Ah, the Innocence of Youth

Ah, the Innocence of Youth

When my daughter Margot was six years old, she had a younger brother and an older sister. We lived in a nice town in Connecticut, and I commuted every day into New York City. We were well off, but certainly not rich. We taught all our children to be frugal, and not to waste money on silly things. Just midway through first grade, Margot didn't yet even have an allowance, but she knew her fourth-grade big sister did, and she was looking forward to it when she got old enough.

So imagine my wife's and my surprise when we opened and read our little girl's very first letter to Santa:

The little darling.

And she was SO on the "good list," too. Never whined, rarely pouted, never demanded that we buy her anything at all, at least not that I recall.

Now a veteran reporter for the Daily Mail online's "Femail" section, with more than a thousand stories carrying her by-line in just her first 18 months on the job, who would have thought that Margot's very first literary accomplishment would be so...brazenly... acquisitive?

We could mark this down as a comment on our times, perhaps. After all, we have definitely entered the Age of the Consumer, when even the poorest families have large-screen TVs on their walls and iPhones in their pockets. Margot's little brother is a student at the University of Chicago now, and last term his very favorite course was titled "Consumption." Seriously.

His course examined the sociology of our ever-more-consuming culture in the Western world. Some of the implications they considered had to do with the increasing "commodifcation" of life; these days, people tend to make dollars-and-cents value judgments on everything, not just groceries and cars and consumer electronics, but relationships, knowledge, and even happiness itself. But another of the writers they studied suggested that buying things for others, whether doing the weekly grocery shopping or picking up a Christmas gift, was in truth a form of love, of serving. It is an inherently selfless and considerate act.

Selflessness is the lesson we need to take from the gift-giving season. It isn't getting gifts that makes you the happiest, but the giving them.

I asked Margot recently whether she actually remembered writing this letter, which we have framed and put on display each Christmas season at the Peppers-Devenney household now, so many years later. She said of course she remembered it. And she remembers putting the polar bear book and stuffed animal on her list too, not because she really wanted them, but because she had accidentally spied those gifts already in her mother's closet, and she didn't want her mom to be disappointed.

This season comes but once a year. Use it wisely, and practice taking pleasure in others' joy.

Deane' Fenstermaker

Business Development professional that enjoys -- Creating business relationships for the benefit of others.

10 年

Don, I loved this post, particularly because your little darlings know mine! It is such a delight when they can begin to take pleasure in the joy of others.

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Chips Lindenmeyr

Lindenmeyr Euro Ski, LLC

10 年

I remember her 'way back then' - the parental seeds of appreciation were well laid so P&D be proud and happy Boxing Day! Cheers from here, Chips

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Barry L Anderson

Retired and enjoying time with family

10 年

This is very insightful story about the real value of giving. Thank you for sharing!

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