After ERE....and the words of wisdom

April 2-4 I had the opportunity to attend and support the Spring ERE conference. This is a conference that I always look forward to attending because it is well organized and well attended. This year in particular I looked forward to hearing Janice Bryant Howroyd as a keynote speaker. More than just the owner of a billion dollar business, she is a superhero who has persevered in an industry that requires both poise and power. It was with great anticipation that I arrived to the ballroom to hear her speak. I was fortunate to sit close enough to the front and catch the attention of the Maisha Cannon who was supporting the Q&A session, passing the microphone to those who had a question. As a new business owner I had a ton of questions for this legend and chose to ask her the one question that was most important to me: can you tell me about a mistake you made and how did you overcome it?  Please know that I was not challenging her incredible journey. What I was hopeful for is that she could share with me a situation that tested her will but also allowed her to learn and grow. 

I was not prepared for her response and had no clue about the emotions it would evoke. She talked about not forgiving herself for being smart. Growing up in North Carolina, in a time where segregation and racial tensions were pervasive, she had been given an opportunity to attend a “white school” because she was smart. Her father insisted on it. She spoke about the burden that the opportunity carried and what it took for her to finally forgive herself, for being smart. I was blown away and a little teary eyed. 

Her answer helped me in a multitude of ways. One, as a minority woman and business owner, I am constantly interacting with clients, potential clients, and business partners. It is imperative that I present myself in an astute, professional, and intelligent manner. I want to be viewed as a trusted subject matter expert and I hope to not be viewed as less knowledgeable or credible than my industry peers. But her comment went much deeper for me as I recalled a conversation I had with a previous employer. I had been hired to help evolve a team and a process that had put the organization at a competitive disadvantage in the talent market. Creating new processes, new strategies, identifying and implementing new technology, and developing new expectations for engagement were necessary to be successful in this role. I eagerly accepted the challenge. So imagine my surprise when the Chief HR Officer attempted to admonish me for what she classified as “always trying to be the smartest person in the room”.  Dare I say, she often found herself at a disadvantage when I was present in meetings. This is a result of her having to repeat information that I had shared with her. It was ok for me to be smart when she needed me, but not so much when she felt impacted in a detrimental way.

Janice’s answer not only made me recall the “smartest person in the room” comment, but I also began to reflect on a multitude of other statements that had been spoken to me:

·        You need to cut your fingernails because they give you that hey home girl what’s up feel – a Talent Acquisition Director.

·        We gave you that mobile device because it had been dropped in the toilet – the entire Staffing Department.

·        You don’t have the mental capacity to understand the difference – an internal candidate.

·        Can I touch your hair? – the Executive Coach assigned to me by my employer.

·        I can help you with diversity because I’m Hispanic – a Talent Management leader.

·        …..because they have the good Indian students, not the ones right off the Reservation – an Engineering Business Manager. 

Life is never easy. No one’s life is perfect. As a minority woman the challenges I am faced with are often compounded, exponentially. I’ve had to be thoughtful and strategic in how I deal with and respond to situations. What I have decided going forward is this:

I am unapologetically talented

I am unapologetically ambitious

I am unapologetically accomplished

I am unapologetically smart

I am unapologetically phenomenal

I will not “dumb it down” to make other people feel better. I will make my best effort to share my knowledge and intellect with whomever I work or partner with. I will utilize every one of my super powers to be a successful business owner, a great sister, an awesome friend, mentor, and advocate. I hope to one day enjoy the same measure of success that Janice has achieved. And I hope to be able to provide the same type of advice that she provided to me.  I wll close by simply saying this - shout out to all the Smart Girls!