Afraid of the F Word?

As a young Lieutenant, I was assigned to the 82D Airborne Division, a paratrooper unit renown for its discipline and operational rigor. My first day of work, I reported to Colonel Hoerner. Colonel Hoerner was the epitome of the 82D Airborne: strong, tough, and no nonsense. He always made me a little nervous, probably because he could recite Army regulations the way most can recall their phone number.

I have many memories of my time with Colonel Hoerner, but the most formidable were in my first few weeks. After he met with one of my Soldiers who toyed with a cell phone, he reminded me that I was responsible for teaching professionalism. When a Soldier across a field didn’t salute him, he corrected him, then corrected me for not doing so first. Colonel Hoerner was tough, but he was fair. During evaluations, he would lead off with ‘there shouldn’t be any surprises,’ and he was right. I was constantly improving, because he gave consistent feedback, and never shied away from tough conversations.

When I left the military, I couldn’t have asked for a better supervisor in the corporate world. Doug was vastly different from Colonel Hoerner, patient and soft spoken with a bias toward discussion, Doug would ask a series of prompting questions that led to self-reflection. Our first discussion on a customer engagement sounded something like this, ‘how do you think it went?’ (Of course I always thought things went well). ‘What could you do differently?’ Or my personal favorite, ‘What would you not do again?’ Doug provided feedback with finesse, where I felt as if I stumbled upon the conclusions myself. His style was different, but the outcome was the same. I had a better understanding of my behaviors, tendencies, and gaps.

Throughout my career, I’ve worked with different managers, all with varying styles. Some have been eager to give and receive feedback, while others seem to avoid tough conversations all together. Regardless, I’ve found that the most functional and productive organizations are those where team members (at any level) feel comfortable exchanging opinions. So how can you ensure that you and your team are constantly improving?

1.    Culture

Build a culture where constructive feedback is solicited. Lead by example and request this from your own peers, superiors, and subordinates. I often tell my teams that feedback is a gift, and like any gift, it can be returned or exchanged. Allowing disagreement and encouraging team members to share opinions contributes to accountability, improved performance, and better outcomes. It also mitigates major long term issues, as conflicts are resolved before they fester.

2.    Training

Teach your teams to ask the right questions and respond with respect; providing feedback is not always intuitive. Some basic questions include: ‘what should I continue to do,’ ‘what should I consider changing,’ and ‘how can I be more impactful.’ Responses should be suggestive, not accusatory, and include specific examples. Encourage individuals to be receptive and avoid justifying behaviors.

3.    Reflection

What gets tracked, gets done. Performance management and feedback should not be an annual occurrence. Implement a process or system for individuals to track feedback consistently. Schedule time for self-reflection and encourage your team to do the same. Identify patterns, tease out the ‘noise,’ and spend some time identifying behaviors, traits, or skills that you would like to hone or change.