Be an Advocate, Not an Ally

Last night, I was speaking to a group of human resources leaders about my LEADER Framework. Diversity is one of the cornerstones. I firmly believe that diversity is the secret sauce to innovation and unlocking massive stakeholder value. Given the general lack of diversity in Corporate America, I believe our markets and companies are undervalued. I recognize what a staggering statement that is given the valuation history of the last few decades.

We’re eons behind in the fight to make businesses more diverse. Make no mistake: this is a fight. It’s a bare-knuckle brawl in a seedy bar.

It’s a fight between comfort and discomfort. It’s a match-up of “more of the same” versus “something better, please.” It’s a silent battle royale between the people who care about human rights and social justice and the people who simply don’t. ?

So, how do we move the needle?

It starts with advocacy, not allyship. Advocacy is all about action while allyship is passive. It makes us feel warm and cozy to say we’re allies with certain people or causes. It’s like slapping a bumper sticker on our cars. Colorful and fun, but it doesn’t do anything.

I’ve committed my entire career to change management. Sometimes, the mere mention of that makes people avoid me like a grim reaper of sorts. “Oh, the change lady…look away!”

Change is messy. It requires us to roll up our sleeves and risk something. In contrast, allyship requires nothing but words. ?It’s well intentioned and it sounds nice. But like tepid dishwater, it doesn’t really serve much of a purpose. That’s because there’s no skin in the game.

When we advocate for someone or something, we step out on a ledge. We risk our reputations, and we use our power. When I hear the word “advocate” a picture instantly comes to mind. I saw this picture during the Black Lives Matter protests a few years ago. I’ve searched high and low, and I can’t locate it. Otherwise, it would be front and center in this article.

The picture shows police lined up full riot gear blocking a street. A young Black woman is in the middle of the street walking towards the police. A few White people are in front of her, creating a human shield of sorts. They’re using the privilege and the power that comes with being White it to protect her.

That image perfectly captures advocacy. It’s risky and terrifying. And that’s the sort of commitment we need to move things forward.

Years ago, when I was heading up marketing at HGTV, there were only two women on our parent company’s leadership team. One of the women, the company’s general counsel, portrayed herself as an ally for women. I remember being a new employee, only a few weeks into the job, when she set up a meeting with me. I felt honored that this esteemed woman from two levels up was reaching out to me so soon in my tenure. ?

Imagine my dismay when I learned that her only reason for setting up the meeting was to hit me up for $10,000 for a local women’s charity with which she was involved. She asked me for that sum of money like it was no big deal. I later learned from other female colleagues that this was a pattern for her. She’d pounce on new women and immediately ask them to donate. Many felt obligated and wrote a check. Thankfully, peer pressure has never been my thing.

I thought her behavior was crass and obnoxious because it was a staggering amount of money and had no benefit for our workplace. But she did advocate for something she cared about. She was actually shameless about foisting her values onto the company.

People called her “Church Lady.” It was a nickname I didn’t understand until someone told me the story. Once, the marketing team had done a promo that showed people saying, “OMG!” as their home makeovers were revealed. The promo offended this woman’s religious sensibilities so much that she insisted it be pulled.

I wish she would have stood for something broader and more important that actually benefitted our business, like insisting on more diverse on-air talent or creating a more amenable workplace for women. I wish she would have stepped in when I was being harassed and used as an organizational scapegoat and punching bag. That just wasn’t important to her. She used her power for other things. But she did use it unabashedly.

If we say we support diversity, we have to step out on that ledge and advocate like “Church Lady.” The difference is that we’re advocating for change that will make our businesses better rather than pet projects and preferences.

We must use our influence and speak up when we see unjust, inequitable and short-sighted things happening. These things are not only wrong, they’re a risk to the economic value of an organization. We must use our power to change the rules of the game and to drive diversity-powered innovation.

I will admit that sometimes, it’s exhausting being the change agent. Some days, I feel like a nagging pusher and no one wants my drug. I speak up on a diversity and inclusion issue, and the tone in the room shifts. I see the look in people’s eyes, “Oh, God. Another woke woman.”

That’s why I tether diversity and inclusion to business results rather than a social justice imperative:

“Gee, this is a beauty business that serves Black women. Maybe we should add some Black women to the leadership team so we can innovate, grab more market share and accelerate our growth?”

?“Wow! Look at that growth in our LGTBQ market share. We’re really onto something here. Maybe adding a few folks from that demo to our teams could speed up our progress?”

“Weird…90% of the viewers of our network are women. Maybe adding a few female senior executives could quicken our ability to super-serve the audience and develop more hit shows?”

I’ve spent the last 25 years in boardrooms. A lot of folks don’t want to hear this: many of the people in decision-making positions are not moved by human rights or social justice. It just doesn’t motivate them.

We can lament that and wring our hands, or we can find something that does motivate them. That something is money. Whether we like it or not, money is America’s love language. As advocates, we need to create an empirical picture of what a diversity-fueled enterprise looks like in dollars and cents.

That’s how we move the needle on diversity and inclusion.