Advice from the Father of the Bride

Father of the Bride

This message is specifically for dads. I’d like to provide some insight what to expect and how to effectively navigate planning a wedding. This is based on more than 35 years of experience in the hospitality industry and nearly as long as a father.

We recently celebrated my daughter’s wedding at #hotelUMD. At first, she and her fiancé were hesitant to book a location that wasn’t their alma mater or an exclusive destination venue, but once they visited the hotel, they immediately envisioned a wedding of their dreams.

Because of my affiliation with the hotel, I was intentional about remaining unbiased, but I knew the property was ideal and the staff would deliver excellent service. What I didn’t expect was just how far they would exceed my expectations.

Executing any successful event requires effective planning, clear communication and attention to every detail, regardless of venue or destination. Wedding planning, however, adds a substantial twist. One I wasn’t exactly prepared for.

In our case, every detail had a significant amount of emotion attached to it and no short supply of opinions — some as important as who will officiate the ceremony to smaller ones such as how the napkins should be folded. There are hundreds of details and most require multiple conversations, any of which can send you over the edge. I tried to keep in mind the advice of a close friend: Relax…this is supposed to be a fun experience. He will soon learn it’s not that simple when his four kids come of age!

Now that I’ve been through this experience myself, allow me to share the lessons I learned. I promise that you will look back as I did and say it was all worth it. It was truly one of the happiest days of my life.

Tradition

??There are many traditions that have evolved or changed entirely, but to the best of my understanding, the bride’s parents are still on the hook for the wedding.

??Elopement is always an option, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t consider offering it. I’m happy I didn’t.

Authenticity

??What works for one couple may not work for another. Remember, this is about celebrating these two individuals as they join together, and the event should be a reflection of them.

??The wedding is for a day and the marriage is for a lifetime, so be sure to make it about your daughter and her future spouse.

Budget

??Expect to go over your budget. Trust me, though, you will look back and be glad you were able to help give the couple the wedding they envisioned.

??A major advantage of planning a wedding at a hotel is that you have access to professionals who can help maximize your budget.

Emotions

??Emotions will ebb and flow. There’s no getting around that.

??When situations get intense, be the one to gently help others reign them in.

You Can’t Control Everything

??Accept that there are some things, such as weather, that are beyond your control (despite what your daughter demands).

??Come up with contingency plans that will ensure the day is still, if not more, special.

Planning

??Hire the right wedding planner, one who will get involved at least three months out.

??Find one with a solid reputation for overseeing even the smallest detail and working well with hotel staff.

Venue Selection

??Whether you’re going for a simple event or want all the options available with a hotel wedding, venue selection is the most critical decision of the planning process. It sets the stage for a successful event, which is the reason we selected #theHotelUMD.

??This particular hotel allowed us to have each event in a different and distinct location while remaining conveniently under one roof. In our case, each area was already outfitted with great décor, which reduced the cost of decorations and flowers.

??Having our guests stay and interact throughout the weekend without the need to travel or rely on shuttles was not only convenient, but a key component to providing a great experience for everyone.

??Visit the location you choose more than once — and at different times, such as brunch, dinner, drinks and weekend getaways — in advance of your event. This gives you an opportunity to get to know the staff.

?Welcome Reception and Brunch

??We were fortunate to have a groom with generous parents. They sponsored a cocktail reception for visiting guests after the rehearsal dinner and an informal brunch at checkout.

??A welcome reception helped set the tone for the weekend and allowed guests to get acquainted or reconnect.

Service Team

??You can choose the best venue in the most beautiful location, but if the service team is not up to the task, the event will not meet your expectations…and there is no dress rehearsal.

??By patronizing the property multiple times, you’ll not only develop human connections, but you will also see the team in action.

If you have read this far, you must be planning a wedding. I hope you’ll consider The Hotel at the University of Maryland, as the bar is set high, and they will leap over it for you.

Congratulations and enjoy the process. Remember, you’re helping make beautiful memories that will last a lifetime.

#weddings #weddingvenue #fatherofthebride #hotels