Adversity: (Coping Series) Toxic Media Trauma

With so much loss in recent months, it can feel like the world is falling apart. Mass shootings, celebrity deaths, murder by police. It all can be overwhelming. Especially if you are dealing with mental illness. Feed after feed is a different kind of death.?Here are some tips on how to deal with loss, trauma, and the media.

Take Time to Grieve

For some people this is hard, but everyone should?take time to grieve. You can do this?in many ways. Crying, remembering, spending time with loved ones, or consulting your support system. Taking time to grieve is even necessary for the strong and silent kind of person like me. Any and everyone that is alive needs to grieve. It’s important because death is the opposite of life and can be a shock when it comes abruptly. Grieving is also important because it marks a new life phase. Change needs to be grieved because something was lost. But in the midst of all the sadness it is important to note what has been gained. This can make the loss feel less bad. So cry, have your own memorial, or write a poem. Do whatever makes you feel better, as long as it is healthy.

Take a Time Out

You?can’t grieve?without a space to do so. Funerals and memorials are very common. Another way you can?take time out is to have planned days off from your obligations. Taking time out for yourself is important. You don’t have to have a mental illness to do this, but either way, it is beneficial. Plan a day to call in sick and do appropriate overtime on a different day or take a sick day. If that is not possible, make grieving an obligation on your day off.

Leave Social Media Alone

All of my methods here have been practiced, but this one is fairly easy and won’t cost you a paycheck. The media, social and mainstream have no mercy for those who can’t always handle being up to date on the latest dreary news. When Robin Williams died, and during just about every influx of news reports on mass shootings and murder by police I took time off from?all?media. You can do this by turning off your notifications or just uninstalling the apps. I leave the room when the news comes on to go to a happy place. I try to avoid every bit of it. Or at least as much as I can. I don’t listen to the radio. I avoid media like the plague. This might sound hard to do, but I promise when you come back you will realize that you didn’t miss anything. I usually give it a week or a month, depending on how close to home the latest catastrophe hit. When Micheal Jackson died of cardiac arrest, like my dad, I avoided all media for like two months. If two months doesn't work for you, or you have never taken time off from media then start with a one day?and work your way up. Remember to take it one day at a time.

Consult with Your Support?System

Celebrity deaths, mass shootings, and murder and brutality by police can be hard to deal with alone. Sometimes you need to grieve as a community. Talking to someone about how you are feeling can be a good way to get through it. In spite of all these horrific things, life is expected to go on. But it’s hard to keep going when your life feels disrupted all over again. Even if you were not directly affected by the event. Therapy is one way to get through and I swear by a good therapist that listens and understands you. A relative, a close friend, or even a willing stranger can also be a good support system. Find someone that you trust and who will not judge your thoughts or feelings. Tell them how you're feeling and what you are thinking to get it off your chest and out of your head.

Things to Keep In Mind

During times like this, the suicide rate often goes up. It is important to do self-checks on how you are feeling to make sure that you are in a good space to handle your priorities. I do self-checks before I make an important decision after a big relationship change has occurred in my life, and when I notice a change in my thought patterns. It is important to be aware of your thoughts and feelings before you do something or make a big decision. Do some self-checks by asking yourself how you feel and observing your thoughts and feelings. If you or someone you know starts to have suicidal thoughts or actions remember these?few things:

1. You are loved by someone
2. That someone doesn’t want you to go
3. Things suck right now, but no pain is forever
4. You are not alone
5. I love you

Yes, I may not know?you but I love you anyway. Life sucks sometimes and I know how you feel. Yes, I actually do. I have been there. I have felt the pain, loneliness, emptiness, hopelessness, all of that. Sometimes life can feel full of pain, misery, and injustice. But these tips can lessen the pain and make it bearable. If these tips don’t help then please contact a professional or the anti-suicide hotline?at 1-800-273-8255 (United States).