The Adventures of Selling Medicare Advantage Plans: A Tragicomedy in 4 Acts

Act 1: The Tempting AD

Picture this: a famous celebrity promising free food on TV. The catch? It's for signing up for a Medicare Advantage plan. Cue the phone calls from elderly folks lured in by the siren song of freebies.

Act 2: AIM-ing Sales

Enter the sales training, where the newly licensed insurance agents learn the sacred mantra AIM: Acknowledge, Inform, Move on. Translation: Dodge questions like a pro and redirect the conversation. "Free food, you say" Sounds like you're trying to save some cash. By the way, what is your zip code.?"

Act 3: The Great Resistance

With 50 years of sales experience under my belt, I vowed not to succumb to the dark side of slick sales tactics. But the young sales managers had other plans, insisting I stick to their scripted nonsense. Spoiler alert: I didn't.

Act 4: The Plot Twist

Just when I thought I had the game figured out, life threw a curveball (It always does.) A call came from MD Anderson Hospital: my little sister was battling for her life. In a moment of clarity, I chose to rush to be by her side. Little did I know it was going to cost me the job.

Epilogue: Lessons Learned

In the end the money wasn't there and it certainly wasn't worth the moral compromise. Selling Medicare health insurance to vulnerable seniors who don't understand what they are buying should be illegal (Are you listing CMS?) Not my proudest moment. But hey, at least I got a crash course in the absurdity of the 21st-century sales tactics, a proud accomplishment of Gen X and Z - ewww.

Final Grade: F for failing on ALL Fronts - Morally, Ethically, and Professionally. Here's to hoping the next generation learns from their mistakes and learns more genuine, human connections.

Because when you are older and perhaps on your death bed, you can look back with pride on what you did and face God with clean hands. That's my hope for you.