Advance Your Career? Build Your Business? Sit With Strangers

“I’m sorry, did you say your name was… John Rambo?”

When you share a name with one of Sylvester Stallone’s most famous characters, even when it’s spelled differently, you get used to the question. From an inquisitive seatmate on a cross-country flight. When being introduced to a new customer for the first time. At the check-in desk at a hotel in Paris.

I’ve not only made my peace with my famous namesake – I have found that it has been an asset as I live one of my best pieces of business advice.

Sit with strangers.

As humans, we tend to gravitate toward the familiar. How often do you enter a room at a social function and scope out the room to find someone you already know? Or grab lunch with your office mate who you spend all your time with?

And as focused professionals who spend our days and weeks engaging with a multitude of colleagues and customers, the idea of engaging with one more person we don’t know can at times feel downright exhausting.

Still, the idea of connecting with others is fundamental to business success (and why I’ve benefited from the instant conversation starter that my name provides).

Opportunities to sit with strangers can come at any time. When you work at a large global corporation like Lockheed Martin, they arise in the normal course of the job. I spent several years leading the international aspects of F-35 for Lockheed Martin – and if ever there was a role where one could find comfort in familiarity, it was that one. 

We had more than 10 international F-35 customers at the time. As I traveled the globe, dropping into unfamiliar cultures and customs, it would have been easy to run for the nearest known American. But I was determined from my first day in the role to immerse myself and unlock the full potential of each experience. 

One such opportunity was a company function where we hosted a Japanese government and industry delegation. Before dinner, I approached a Japanese gentleman who was standing alone and struck up a conversation. We traded views on our respective cultures and I spent much of the evening with him, offering insights into American cultural norms (including those of Fort Worth, Texas, which can be a challenge even for the average American!)

When we next met, I was in Tokyo and the tables were turned. We were entering challenging negotiations with a Japanese company that was to manufacture F-35 components. My newfound friend knew this company well, and also knew the lead negotiator. He offered me some very helpful cultural tips and negotiation strategies, and with his help we were able to conclude the discussions successfully. 

One dinner. One conversation. One person. Had a significant impact on me – and our nation’s largest defense program!

Are you sitting with coworkers who are strangers? Studies have shown that the most diverse organizations are the ones that perform best – but we only can fully capture that value when we engage with that diverse population in an inclusive way. Are you partnering across your enterprise to deliver maximum value for your customers? Do you even know what you don’t know about other parts of your organization, or could sitting with a stranger help open your eyes?

Are you sitting with customers who are strangers? Do you have one point of contact who you always deal with? Or might there be a rising star in the organization who will be a key decision maker soon?

Are you sitting with people who are strangers? Have you paused to consider the uniqueness of each person you encounter? That behind each person, each face, and each (famous movie character) name is a one-of-a-kind story? In a time of intense tribalism and “us-vs-them” mentality, have you thought about how much every one of us can learn from one another? Does sitting with strangers unlock not only the potential to be better at business, but better as people?

Try sitting with strangers. It may be uncomfortable at first, but I don’t think you’ll regret it.

I’ve shared one of my stories. Do you have a great “sit with strangers” story? Share it in a comment. And if I’m a stranger to you, come sit with me virtually – I recently started on Twitter @realjonrambeau.