ADHD and Getting Unstuck: A Candid Conversation Among ADHD Coaches

Today’s learning partner session with Suzette Doucet, ACC , Tina Squire, PCC, ACCG and @Anna Schlapp, my colleagues from the ADDCA ADHD Coaching Advanced School, was incredibly enlightening. We meet once a week to ensure we have the intellectual support we need, sharing our challenges and solutions. This week, our conversation centred around a vital topic: getting unstuck.

As ADHD coaches, we know that people with ADHD have an interest-based nervous system. Since you're the reader and you might not know this, let's get one thing clear: stimulating interest and moving energy is crucial for us in our ADHD management journey. The conversations we usually have in our ADHD Coaching revolve around these key points. But what happens when the main thing is missing? Whether you’re looking for a job, trying to ramp up your business, or recovering from burnout, these are all very common scenarios for individuals with ADHD.

Let's see!

Shhhh - I used the transcript from our session to generate these 5 steps. So you’re getting a behind-the-scenes on what 4 Advanced ADHD Coaches talk about when they meet- the good stuff. Obviously, this is just a snippet of what we discussed, but I hope you find it helpful.

Step 1: Remember Your Purpose

Yes, we all want to leave something behind us, but get let's get more specific. Don't keep it general (as we tend to do when we have ADHD). You have to move from general to concrete. Think about the things that make you come to life and identify the feeling you want when you wake up in the morning. One of us shared how discovering her purpose gave her the energy to move forward even on challenging days. It's not just about a vague legacy; it’s about pinpointing exactly what makes you tick.

Take some time to reflect on your core values and passions. What are the things that light you up? Is it helping others? Creating something new? Solving complex problems? Once you’ve identified these elements, translate them into specific goals. For instance, if you love helping others, maybe your purpose involves mentoring or volunteering. If creating excites you, set goals around projects or artistic pursuits. Getting clear on this will drive your motivation and give you direction.

Step 2: Break Tasks into Small Steps

The journey of 1,000 miles begins with one step. Once you’ve identified what you need to do, start somewhere. The idea is to follow the model of BE-DO-HAVE. Start anywhere, have anything, or wish to feel anywhere. The question then becomes: Who do you need to be to feel that way? What do you need to do to feel that way? Fake it until you make it. Find ways to create that feeling.

For example, if your goal is to feel successful, try working from a five-star hotel reception. Surround yourself with successful people. Conversations about positive things will lead to positive feelings and positive actions. Do you understand the circle we’re trying to break and intrude upon? Roxana shared her experience of using luxury environments to boost her mood and productivity, which is a perfect example of a small, actionable step leading to significant changes.

Step 3: Create Pattern Interrupts

Get really good at pattern interrupts. We spoke about inertia—an object in motion stays in motion, and one at rest stays at rest until something changes. You need to create a pattern interrupt to change your current state. Where you are right now, you won't magically wake up somewhere else. You need to actively create a change.

Experiment with new environments or routines. If you always work from home, try a library or café. If your daily routine feels stagnant, shake it up with a new activity. One of us talked about using pattern interrupts to break the cycle of feeling stuck, like scheduling spontaneous outings or engaging in new hobbies. The idea is to introduce a disruption that sparks a new flow of energy and creativity.

Step 4: Manage Your Energy Levels

There’s a strong element of being self-aware enough to understand how much energy you’re dealing with today. If you're just at 20%, putting pressure on yourself to work at 80% is not smart. First, understand where your energy level is. Then, work smart, not hard.

I emphasised the importance of being kind to yourself and recognising your energy limits. If you only have two productive hours today, what is the most important thing you could do to create a pattern interrupt and change the dynamic? Track your energy levels and plan your tasks accordingly. This way, you make the most of your high-energy moments and allow yourself to rest when needed.

Step 5: Seek Support and Accountability

You don't have to do this alone. Connection is one of the things that stimulates us. Find a way to track progress and process this. Just like I meet with my ADHD Coaching partners every week, even though we finished school a long time ago and got our accreditations, we know that what keeps us going is connection. Despite being busy and life happening—I can't really spill the beans and tell you everything, but some really big things happened this year, including my wedding—we still find time to meet almost every week because we know in theory and in practice how important support and accountability are. Whether it’s a friend, a coach, or a group, having someone to check in with keeps you motivated and accountable. Celebrate small victories together and share your challenges. It makes the journey less daunting and more enjoyable.

Final Thoughts

Getting unstuck when you have ADHD is about real talk with yourself. It’s about leaning in and understanding your energy levels, your interests, and the "laws of physics" that govern our behaviour. Work with them, not against them, and you can use them to your advantage. I hope you found this useful. If you did, I'm more than happy to share insights from our group of musketeers, where we tackle ADHD coaching challenges on a global level. I’m pretty proud of these amazing, kind, and switched-on women who live life authentically and share the same values. They are a big part of my success as an ADHD coach, so I also want to take this moment to thank them for being in my life and foresee them remaining a part of it.

Feel free to share your thoughts and experiences on this topic. Let's support each other in finding purpose and getting unstuck!