Adding Up the Little Things

It’s the little things. Those four words capture so well the big impact that small moments can have on our lives.?

It’s sometimes easy to miss that impact when we’re smack in the middle of it. It’s only when looking back that we realize just how much those little things mattered, and how much the little things added up.?

I often think of this when I look at my three sons. They’re all in college or graduate school now. The time’s gone by so quickly. My wife and I are proud of the men they’ve become, and we can’t help but think of all the small moments that went into making them who they are.?

My wife and I are proud of the men our boys have become, and can’t help but think of all the small moments that made them who they are.?

We can’t take all the credit, of course. We know that people and places outside of our home helped shape them; that friends and situations influenced them; that they experienced joys and challenges. Even so, we recognize that the seemingly mundane, everyday interactions we had with our boys occasionally and unpredictably had an outsized impact—for them and for us.

Individually, these small interactions may not seem like much, but little by little, they add up. Like bricks, they set the foundation of the people we are and the people we become.

Individually, these small interactions may not seem like much. A smile here, an absence there; a terse response, a sincere compliment, an unexpected kindness. Not a big deal in the moment, and maybe not even something you’d recall if asked about it in a day or two. Little by little, they add up. Like bricks, they set the foundation of the people we are and the people we become.

I can’t go back and redo the moments I’ve missed, but I continue to try to make the moments count and to remember that it’s sometimes the smallest decision that has the biggest impact.

I can’t go back and redo the moments I’ve missed—as a father, a son, a husband, a banker, a colleague, or a friend. None of us can. All we can do is to continue to try to make the moments count and to remember that it’s sometimes the smallest decision that has the biggest impact.

To quote Maya Angelou: “…people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” It’s those feelings—of being valued, supported and cared for—in moments large and small that make all the difference. ?