Actually, I can

Hey Friends,

If you have been with me for a while, you know that I LOVE the new year. I love it because in my world a new year means new goals and dreams to work towards in the year to come.

Nothing gets me more excited than a blank notebook just waiting for me to fill it with my thoughts, ideas, dreams, and aspirations. Sunday I spent hours doing it and walked away from that time feeling like a total badass, ready to conquer the world.

But today I don’t want to talk about goal setting and getting in the ‘new year, new me’ mindset. Last year I wrote, one of my most popular blogs called “New Year, New You – Goal Setting” and I would highly recommend reading this for a step by step guide on exactly how to go about your goal setting this year.

But again, that’s not what today is about.  Today is about looking back at the past year(s), remembering how far you have come, and all the obstacles you overcame. Pumping yourself up to see how much of a badass you already are.

I had the idea for this blog about 9 months ago when the movie Captain Marvel came out and Aerie (my favorite store) came out with a Captain Marvel themed clothing line. Captain Marvel is about a female superhero who is a total badass and pretty much the best superhero out there. The movie came at a time of transition in my life and after I saw the movie I was so jacked up I bought the sweatshirt pictured above. Well played Aerie, well played.

I don’t necessarily remember the “Actually, I can” quote in the movie, but I left the movie theatre with that exact feeling, that I could do anything.

In the movie, many people tell Captain Marvel she can’t do something or isn’t “enough” to succeed, but then she saves the world. So, actually, she can. Jokes on them!

I wanted to bring this up today because before we look at the year ahead and start to focus on where we want to go, I want us to take a good look back and see how far we have come. I want us all to make sure we stop to remember everything that went right in the previous year. All the victories, big and small.

Before we take on something new, all of us need to celebrate the wins and rejoice in what we HAVE done already, not just focus on what we HAVEN’T done yet. It puts us in the mindset and feeling of “I am a winner” when you are setting yourself a new set of goals.

It’s also important to be in this “can do, already did” mindset because on the journey of chasing our dreams there will always be obstacles and people out there trying to knock us off of our path.

In the past, there have been so many times when someone told me I wasn’t smart enough, experienced enough, or talented enough to succeed.   

When I was in high school, I loved Chemistry and wanted to take AP Chem, but my teacher literally told me I wasn’t smart enough to take the class.

When I was Miss Wolcott, people would say I didn’t have enough experience to win Miss CT.

When I transitioned from Accounting to a recruiting agency, and then agency recruiting to internal recruiting, I was told I wasn’t talented enough to succeed and it would ruin my career.

I have been told that I was arrogant and ignorant for dreaming big and setting myself high goals.

 Let me say that one more time for the people in the back…

I was told, to my face, that I was arrogant and ignorant for dreaming big and setting myself high goals.

L-freaking-O- L. 

I have been knocked down time and time again, but I never stopped getting right back up. And not for one second did I let myself believe that what they were saying was true. I just carried onward and upward.

After my teacher told me I wasn’t smart enough to take AP Chem, she ended up letting me take the course but said I would have to come for extra help every day to keep up. And you bet your ass I did. Every day after school I showed up, studied and practiced problems with her, and then I would study until late at night after I got home from dance classes.

I did struggle and needed A LOT of extra help, but every day I kept showing up and gave it my all.

At the end of the year, there are awards typically given to the two top performers in the class. That year my teacher gave the first award to the top student, then she gave the second award to the last student in the class. She gave that second award to me. To this day I still get tears in my eyes thinking, talking or writing about it. It gets me because she didn’t award me for being the smartest, but the hardest working and never giving up.

She told me I couldn’t when actually I could.

After I was told I didn’t have enough experience in the pageant world to win Miss CT (because it was my first and only year ever competing), I again gave it my all. I ate super healthy, worked out a ton, practiced my interview multiple times a week, and went on hundreds of visits throughout my town to prepare me for the job of Miss CT.

Then, when the big night of Miss Connecticut finally arrived, I was the last to be called out on finals night. I was #10 out of the top 10. We competed again, and then I was called into the top 5. Then they started calling off 4th runner up, 3rd runner up, 2nd runner up until it was just me and one other girl. The top 2. “Your NEW Miss Connecticut for 2012 is….. MISS WOLCOTT, EMILY AUDIBERT!”

They told me I couldn’t when actually I could.

When I transitioned from Accounting to Recruiting, I was told I shouldn’t make the switch into sales, that I didn’t “have it in me…” The first year I was a total mess and again found myself at the bottom of the pile. Then my second year I not only had a comeback tour, but I finished the year among the top 5 recruiters at the entire company.

Two years after that I was told I would ruin my career if I were to move from agency to working with one client internally… Not only did I surpass my goals for the year, but it has been one of the most rewarding experiences in my career and I have learned SO much about the other side of recruiting. What I have learned and gained from this experience has been priceless.

They told me I couldn’t when actually I could.

Now, why am I telling you this?

I am telling you this because, at one point in my life, all of those things were major goals I set for myself. I wanted to take and do well in AP Chem, I wanted to be Miss Connecticut, I wanted to be a successful, respected recruiter. All of those goals and dreams that I had for myself, other people told me I couldn’t do it.

When actually I could. And I did.

Every year going into the new year, I like to remind myself of those accomplishments and of what I had to work through to get there because those were some of the hardest goals I set out for myself. They were goals that no one believed that I could do when actually, I could.

They were the type of big wins I go back to, to remind myself that I can do anything that I set my mind to. Those wins remind me that I can reach for the “stretch goal” or the outlandish dreams that I have, even when other people think I am crazy because I am not crazy. I am more capable than I ever realized.

This is how I want you to feel going into 2020. I want you to feel all the feels of “actually, I can” because you can.

You can do absolutely anything in this life that you want too.  You are completely capable and more than enough to go after that dream.

I believe in you. You just need to believe in you too, and then you will get there, I promise you that.

This year, instead of being the ‘little of the engine that could’ saying to yourself, “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.”

I want you to stand tall with your hands on your hips in a Captain Marvel stance and say to yourself,  “Actually, I KNOW I can.” And don’t let anything or anyone stop you.

Now go get em!