Active listening - An often lost skill

Aspects of active listening

There are five key active listening techniques you can use to help you become a more effective listener:

• Pay Attention. Give the speaker your undivided attention, and acknowledge the message
• Show that you're Listening
• Provide feedback that is relevant to what you just heard
• Defer judgement. Better yet don't judge at all
• Respond appropriately. As it relates to what was just told to you

I would add that empathy plays a huge part in active listening. A real understanding of what the person is sharing with you.

I have been on many sales calls with colleagues. I have also been the client. I could not count the amount of times that a sales rep did not answer the question the way it was asked. Or, because they have a set way of working their pitch, they ask questions that were not relevant in a reveal by the client earlier in the discussion. Worst of all they ask a question and then begin their pitch before the full answer is given.

Whether in business or in life, the most powerful tool we have as human beings is being able to actively listen. Then provide empathy with an understanding of what the person is speaking about.

So many "leaders" in today's world speak without listening. Which means they either do not care about what matters to you, or they prefer to hear themselves speak. To "dictate" to you what should matter to you.

Remember when you went on a first date with someone that really impressed you. How deeply you listened to them. How many questions you asked them to discover what made them tick and what kind of person they are. How much you shared about yourself. Why? Because it mattered. Doesn't it still?

It's time we elect leaders that listen to us in that same way. It is time we hire salespeople who not only ask questions of their clients, but listen to their answers. It is time we stop our lives for a bit, to take the time to listen to our partners the way we used to when we first met. Not to mention our children.

It is time we become more human!