ACTION TO ENHANCE POSITIVITY

My previous article “Mindset Matters: A Positive Mind, A Positive Life!” is about tuning to a right mindset. In this article, I focus on action.

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Understanding our needs

I would like to draw readers’ attention to this Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, created by Abraham Maslow in 1943. When we are aware of our own needs, we can take steps to boost our happiness and well-being.

Humans are complicated. We need to fulfil our basic needs (physiological and safety), which are essential to our existence. After satisfying our basic needs, we can focus on meeting higher-level needs, which leads to more satisfaction. Love and belonging are emotional and interpersonal needs that lead to feelings of connection and support. Esteem needs are related to self-worth, accomplishment and respect. Self-actualisation, the realisation of a person’s potential, is the pinnacle of the hierarchy of needs, which not many individuals aspire to pursue, often due to a necessity to fulfil more basic needs first.

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Staying healthy

Maintaining work-life balance, eating healthy food, exercising and having enough sleep and rest are critical to our wellbeing. However, sometimes when we are focusing on accomplishing our goals, our health becomes less of a priority. It's worth remembering that without good health, we cannot achieve and sustain our goals. A healthy body will generate a happy life, but it requires our conscious effort. I suggest individuals include exercising and exposure to sunshine and nature into their weekly routine. If one does not like sports, walking in nature to breathe in fresh air is still beneficial. A healthy body will have energy to pursue goals, stay motivated and when faced with adversity, it will be better equipped to weather the storm.

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Financial stability

A stable income stream supporting all basic needs is a cornerstone of financial health. Hard work and smart career choices are essential to income growth and coupled with self-discipline and an investment portfolio are the main ways of securing a degree of financial comfort. Some people, eager to follow their passion or diversify their sources of income, create a side business in addition to their main career path.

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Enhancing relationship – treat others the way you want to be treated

To receive kindness, fairness and respect from others, you must act in the same way towards them. If you are impolite or disrespectful people tend to shy away from you or respond rudely. Your life will be happier when you treat others nicely.

Positive Relationships, another crucial element of the PERMA[1] model, are essential to one’s happiness and well-being. Strong interpersonal skills with authenticity help you to build genuine and sincere relationships, leading to a happier life. An arrogant, inconsiderate, disrespectful personality is a hindrance to forging positive relationships.

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Happiness is contagious

Remember to smile more. When you are happy, you will affect the vibe of your surroundings and lift the mood of the people around you. Conversely, if you release negative energy, your environment will be full of negativity. A happy person will be more welcome everywhere and attract positivity.

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Learning how to love others

Knowing how to love others helps to earn love. As everyone has a different perception of love, applying what is important to ourselves to others may not mean love to them. Understanding what others need means we can take relevant action and generate positive impacts. For example, our children prefer our presence over presents - they want us to attend their school performances and celebrate milestones together. Therefore, we should make time for shared activities and put them in high priority.

Love must be expressed in words and aligned with action. Love in your mind without delivering any message and action is pointless as others don’t know it and cannot feel it.

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Exploring and understanding other’s perspectives

Exhibiting empathy is critical in a healthy relationship. Listening to understanding is an essential first step, asking relevant questions, expressing agreement and paraphrasing in similar words, and giving friendly touch are helpful. By playing different roles in life, we can experience various perspectives.

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Exercising self-love and choosing the right people

Self-love is necessary for sustaining long-term relationships. One must know how to love oneself before loving others. Setting boundaries and detoxing from negative relationships are beneficial to creating inner peace. Difficult people always teach you a lesson, but you must learn it and move on.

Surround yourself with authentic, kind, respectful and positive people and shy away for those who complain and drain your energy. Positive people will bring in more positive impacts to your life. Cherish them and don’t take them for granted.

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Making the best choices for yourself

Understanding yourself is crucial. When making critical life decisions, spend more time thinking. Collect information, compare pros and cons and make the best selections for yourself. After thorough thinking, it is about putting effort into achieving goals. There is no ideal situation, but it is all about no regrets.

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Addressing negative feelings

Focusing on the positives will not shield us from life sorrows, trauma, losses, and other difficulties that can torture us. We cannot ignore our feelings; self-acceptance is crucial; we must accept our weakness and be patient for our hearts to be healed. Instead of focusing on immediate remedial action, we may need to talk to someone we trust (friends, family, therapist or coach), or take a break to allow our mind and body to rest and gradually recover. Even after a meaningful rest, sorrow and pain may persist before disappearing. However, life must go on and we must shift back to a new normal gradually and accept the changes. By not disproportionately focusing on the issue, we can channel our energy on our career, business, health, personal growth, relationships or passion.? Accepting the fact that life cannot be perfect is helpful.

I suggest two methods to minimise overthinking:

1)?????? when you want to stop thinking about something, keep counting from 1 to 7 until you successfully shift your brain to something else,

2)????? initiate a meditative state by deep breathing and focusing on your inhale and exhale, which will help to reset your brain.

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“Less is More” philosophy

“Less is More” advocates simplicity and minimalism to create room in our lives free from complexity. The principle emphasises simplicity, focusing on essential elements, and avoiding unnecessary clutter. It is a principle that underscores the importance of prioritising quality over quantity.

Pursuing a luxurious life with more and more possessions can be exhausting. Having fewer possessions but treasuring them is preferable to accumulating a surplus. This principle conveys the concept that reducing clutter, distractions, and unnecessary elements can lead to a more meaningful and fulfilling existence.

Individuals can consider throwing away, donating or selling things that they don’t need, so that they can reserve more space and save time. Gradually, one will realize that life with fewer belongings can be fulfilling and comfortable.

Life is about balance; individuals should constantly strike for their own balance, reviewing priorities and reallocating time and energy. Although our satisfaction arises from our hard work and achieving goals, but a never-enough mindset can be draining physically and psychologically. Sacrificing health or family time in pursuit of more wealth may ultimately prove meaningless.

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Going with the flow

Our disappointment and frustration arise from discrepancies between our expectations and reality. The stronger our desire for control of the outcomes, the more likely we encounter disappointment or even a sense of failure and powerlessness.

However, it doesn't mean we shouldn't set goals and set about achieving them. But we should focus on what we can control and influence and be prepared to tackle outcomes that fail to meet our expectations.

Once we accept that some aspects are out of our control, we will become happier and more relaxed. Occasionally, pleasant surprises may emerge.

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Cultivating passions

When you are engaged in your passion, you don’t feel the passing of time. I agree with the Japanese lifestyle advice called IKIGAI, which advocates for people to develop a passion. It can be your favourite sports, arts, music, dancing, gardening, bakery, or whatever you love spending time on. I have cultivated many passions so that I don’t feel bored, such as travelling, photography, making albums, reading, learning, writing, skiing and hiking.

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Pursuing for personal growth

Many aspects of our life are not fully in our control, for instance, career, business, finance, and relationships. We can put our efforts into pursuing good outcomes and hope for the best, but nothing is guaranteed.

Personal growth is within our control, i.e. choice of areas of learning, and how broad and deep to learn. It is about investing time and putting in effort, which will bring significant benefits in terms of knowledge, perspectives, confidence and resilience. This is a fruitful, satisfying and enriching process.

After spending many years enriching my knowledge in macroeconomics and finance, I am expanding my horizons in the coaching and psychology world. I feel enriched deepening my knowledge and this pursuit will remain my lifelong goal.

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Pursuing life purpose and meaning

Self-actualisation, the realisation of a person’s potential and the full development of one’s abilities, which is the pinnacle of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, isn't something everyone knows how to pursue. Confucius, a famous Chinese philosopher, said 五十而知天命，some people know the purpose of their life in this world only when they reach around 50. Identifying your purpose and being able to pursue it will add meaning to your life journey and become the source of satisfaction.

I have a strong feeling that my purpose is to help and support people. I aim to create positive impacts on individuals, and hopefully to create a rippling effect to spread to more people. I encourage individuals to follow their heart in pursuit of whatever they long for. We only live once and it's ultimately very fulfilling to be able to muster up the courage to chase your dreams.

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Readers can refer to my previous article “Mindset Matters: A Positive Mind, A Positive Life!” https://lnkd.in/dBSVm8eH

[1] The PERMA Model was developed by Dr Martin Seligman which identified five elements to contribute to happiness, they are Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationship, Meaning, and Achievement.