Acknowledging My Grief and Gratitude
Barbara Karnes, RN
Author of GONE FROM MY SIGHT aka: "the hospice blue book", NHPCO Hospice Innovator Award, End of Life Educator
Thanksgiving! A day of gratitude for a year of blessings. For many it is a challenge to find blessings in this chaotic world. For those living with a life-threatening illness, caring for someone faced with end of life issues, or experiencing their first year or even years of grief, it can be hard to find anything to be thankful for.
That’s how I feel today. I’m tired. I’m concerned about the world. I’m sad some of my family won’t be with me this Thanksgiving holiday. I miss my husband Jack.
He was my go-to person for helping me understand the world. He was my guidance when life seemed precarious; a strong, reassuring presence to my uncertainty.
As I am writing this, the thought, “what does this have to do with Thanksgiving?” popped into my head. It made me think for a moment.
My thoughts: I am grateful and thankful for the years I had with him. For the reassurance, the sense of security he brought into my life and our family’s life. I am thankful for the children we raised together, for the love of animals and travel we shared, for the sense of stability our partnership provided. I was not alone. We had each other.
As I reflect on what I have written above, even though he is not here to comfort me with “it will all be okay,” I can be very thankful for all the years that he was a part of my life and did provide that comforting reassurance.
I know I am not the only griever feeling the loss of their special person this season of holidays. If, like me, you are having a challenging time finding something to be thankful for, how about the thankfulness that we are living, we are able to smile, to laugh, to enjoy living with those around us.?
How about thankfulness that we have good times to remember and to be thankful for. How about we focus on what to be thankful for, with our past being the anchor upon which to build our living going forward? That is where I’m focusing my energy right now. Blessings to you during this time.
Something More… about Acknowledging My Grief and Gratitude
Don’t be surprised if you see or hear the person who is dead.
Do know that phenomenon is normal and happens to a lot of people.
From the Do’s and Don’ts section of My Friend, I Care: The Grief Journey
?? Reducing Nurse Stress & Burnout Without Guilt | Creator of the BECOMING Method? | Author | Coach & Speaker for Individuals and Organizations | Podcast Host
3 天前This is such an important topic. Our local churches come together for a Blue Christmas service for this reason and it’s so beautifully touching.
I've lost 9 dear friends and several family members in the past 18 months. Barbara's words remind me to hold them in my heart with kindness and thanks for our time together.
Intake Coordinator/RCD at Enliven Home Health
4 天前I couldn’t agree with you more Barbara, ??blessings to you, enjoy the memories of the life you built with your husband, a powerful love is the greatest blessing of life. All of us past or present hospice caregivers are thankful for you!