Achieve Success By Living A Balanced Life

In order to overcome real-success #challenges, we need to instill within ourselves the intrinsic ability to focus on what is important, too foster true #values and #principles in support of people #growth and #development, instead of turning people aside in order to achieve monetary desires. The biggest challenge however, is overcoming the habitual thoughts and actions we’ve been programmed with throughout our lives. Today, we probably associate with more people in a week, than those three generations ago probably did in a lifetime. Things were simple then. I remember overhearing my Great Grandmother once, comment; “I don’t understand what has happened to American society. It wasn’t too long ago when it was uncommon for someone to have an enemy, or know of anyone you disliked.”

 On another occasion, prior to her passing, I remember asking my Great Grandmother, what she believed was the reason for her and Papa achieving the level of success and happiness they did in their lives. Her response was; “A large family, lots of friends and acquaintances.” Pondering this for years, and working with many organizations, I constantly sought a defining reason for my Great Grandmother’s concerns so many years ago. Why the shift in the relationship-building pattern of society?

 I believe it’s evident. Societal mindsets have changed. Our social ability to collaborate and associate with others, finds itself in a chaotic state. Today, instead of being focused on people relationships, our culture is a culture focused on what I like to call ‘BIG things’. In today’s society, BIG things determine our level of success, but bring little happiness. Just look around, BIG is everywhere -- BIG homes. BIG boats. BIG cars. The ‘BIG things’ mentality often times leads to segregation of the individual from social, team, and family environments. The person focused on ‘BIG things’ expends most of their energy and time on activities that will move them closer to BIG things. Don’t get me wrong, I believe we should all work hard, enjoy life and our success. What I am talking about here, are those individuals who virtually separate themselves from those around them to achieve their own personal desires – with little to no consideration for other’s wants, needs, or desires. For example, as a single Father, I’ve had the opportunity to meet many other single parents around the country. Many of their stories are the same. A spouse/parent has cast aside their wife and children – only to go after their own personal desires. Many forgo being a responsible parent, do not associate with, nor support children left behind. The fabric of society is only as strong as our ability to develop and expand our influence to others.

 Our society is centered on monetary goals more than people goals and needs. There is little to no consideration for others, especially those in need. When was the last time you volunteered just one day of your time in a Hospice, Shelter, or Soup Kitchen for the homeless? Or, when was the last time you offered to mentor someone at work, and teach the skills you’ve learned, so they have an equal chance to succeed? Crime and violence is dramatically increasing (The United States Crime Index Rate increase from 1960 to 1991 was 313%). There are Wars and rumors of Wars all around the globe. Road rage is the norm, both in and out of rush hour traffic. These selfish and non-tolerant behaviors and traits are not only evident in our personal lives, and work lives, concerning enough; they are also evident in our children’s lives. How many times has your son or daughter come home complaining they’ve been teased? Even worse, violent crime has become common place in school yards and campuses all across the United States; with many of the perpetrators being children themselves.

 We can find this lack of consideration and respect for others everywhere, just turn on the television. Reality shows are thriving as a result of society’s inability to develop valued relationships with others, and an insatiable thirst for seeing others weakness, pain, and suffering. Over the past 15 years, American Blue Collar jobs have dramatically decreased through lay-offs, acquisition, and companies going out of business. On the opposite side of the coin, the Nation has seen a dramatic increase in White Collar jobs; jobs requiring the inert ability of employees to build valued relationships with customers, clients, and co-workers. How productive and successful will our Companies and Nation be moving into the future, if our ability to effectively develop valued relationships is eroded further? How successful would the Realtor, Consultant, or Insurance Sales Person be if they were unwilling or unable to building long-lasting relationships with their clients?

 Throughout my career, I’ve worked within the Government and Corporate America to develop and implement employee commitment surveys. Out of all the competencies the surveys analyzed, there always seemed to be the same standard issues across almost every organization. #Employeefeedback echoed common concerns; there is an ever increasing lack of support and caring on the part of #management towards the employee and their goals, as well as a lack of positive#employerecognition. These areas are crucial to the success of any organization. I’ve been asked on more than one occasion, why I believed this to be the case. The only response I could deliver was, I am surprised at how many companies talk about how important their employees are, yet they do not understand how crucial employee #recognition, #performanceimprovement support, and common #goals are to employee job satisfaction and business success. As individuals, we thrive on acknowledgement of our efforts through monetary and non-monetary means. Recognition makes us feel good and communicates to us we are doing a good job. As members of the human race, we yearn for human connection and acknowledgement.

Think of a time when you felt you did a great job, and were proud of your efforts. So much so, you wanted to share your accomplishments with everyone. Only to find you received little to no recognition from your manager, even though you had a positive impact on the team, department, or organizational goals. Write down how this experience made you feel and How did it motivate you in the future?

Now, think of a time, where you receive recognition or praise for a job well done. Write down how this experience made you feel. How did it motivate you in the future?

If we want to find happiness in our lives and achieve job satisfaction we need to align ourselves to achieving success. This can only be done through a consistent focus on what is truly important; the drivers for success: our peers, our coworkers, our families, and a spiritual ability to focus on a power greater than ourselves, no matter who we consider that higher power to be. We need to learn to live balanced lives. We need to live each day with passion and commit ourselves to synergistic social, family, and work environments. We need to shift our focus towards helping others find happiness and success. By doing so, we write our personal epitaph for success and happiness.

 There is no better story, which demonstrates the impacts of living or not living a balanced life, more than ‘A Christmas Carol’ by Charles Dickens. The story is about a wealthy Business Man, who cared nothing for others or himself, all he cared about was his wealth. His firm was known as Scrooge and Marley. Marley Scrooge’s business partner in life had died seven years previous; and lived by the same values and morals as Scrooge in life before his passing.

The story opens with Scrooge working in his counting house. Scrooge left the door open between his work area and his clerk, Bob Crachits’ small cell like room, where Bob is copying letters. Bob Crachit has a very small fire, which hardly warms the small room. Bob Cratchit is unable to make the fire bigger, because he is unable to stoke the fire with more coal, because Scrooge kept the coal-box in his own room; and very seldom would allow Bob Crachit to collect new coal to keep his fire burning, as a result, Bob Cratchit often could be found wrapping himself up in his white comforter, and trying to keep warm over the candle which is burning on his desk.

 As Scrooge was preparing to leave his office, two portly gentlemen come into the counting house. Because of the festive season, they had come to ask Scrooge for donations to help the poor and destitute, those who suffered greatly during that special time of year. When one of the men stated, “A few of us are endeavoring to raise a fund to buy the poor some meat and drink, and means of warmth. We choose this time, because it is a time, of all others, when Want is keenly felt, and Abundance rejoices. What shall I put you down for?” Scrooge responded, “Nothing!” Scrooge felt it was not his business to help those in need, that it was the responsibility of others and the government.

 When Scrooge turned down the covers for the evening, he received four visits; one visit from his previous business partner, Marley, and three additional spirits. Each focusing on different areas, which in all, put things the way they should, they helped scrooge balance out his life, which in turn generated a shift in his life, and the lives of those around him. Specifically, the crippled Tiny Tim, son of Scrooges Clerk, Bob Cracthit. By morning, Scrooge had transformed his life from one of loneliness and greed, to one of caring and the receiver of riches he had never before had.

 Living a balanced life means demonstrating consideration for other’s needs, and exhibiting Trust in others abilities. Through living a balanced life, we focus not only on our own social, emotional, spiritual, mental, physical, and financial needs; we also focus on the social, emotional, spiritual, mental, physical, and financial needs of others; by doing so we generate unity and trust within the family, team, and organization.

By focusing upon the needs of others, we generate a personal consideration and trust for others, which greatly determine the level of personal success to be achieved. Additionally, we are able to more effectively promote consistency in people’s efforts and activities, team performance is more consistent and focused upon achieving success, and our personal efforts and activities better support the achievement of personal, team, and #organizationalgoals.

Answer the following questions about this story:

 1.     Prior to Scrooges life changing experience, which areas of need, was Scrooge balanced in in his personal life?

 2.     Which areas of need, are you balanced in, in your own personal life?

 3.     Prior to Scrooges life changing event, how did Scrooge demonstrate consideration for, and trust in others?

 4.     What level of consideration and trust in others do you exhibit in your own personal life?

 How Balanced Is Your Life?

 1.     Are you focused on the things that are important in life, those things that will truly promote success in your life?

 2.     What’s more important to you, achieving personal financial success or spending time helping others improve his or her life?

 3.     Where do you spend the greatest amount of your time?

 a.     At home with family

b.     At work

c.     In the service of others

 d.     Enjoying personal endeavors and hobbies

4.     Write down at least three relationships at work where you feel comfortable enough to share your feelings and concerns? Do your employees feel the same about you?

 5.     Write down all of the new close friendships you’ve made this year.

 Answer the following questions (Y = Yes or N = No) in each category:

 Social Abilities

 _____ I spend at least two hours per week serving others.

 _____ I am complemented on my ability to effectively listen to others concerns.

 _____ I enjoy being around others.

 _____ I like working with a group of people more than working by myself.

 _____ I value the opinions of others.

 _____ I am always willing to step in and help others succeed, when I believe I will receive little or no recognition for my support efforts.

 Total Yes Responses _____

Total No Responses _____

 Emotional Awareness

 _____ I am able to recognize what I am feeling.

 _____ I acknowledge my own feelings, including those I don’t like.

 _____ I am able to express my feelings.

 _____ I do not hold others responsible for the way I feel.

 _____ I let those close to me be responsible for their own feelings.

 _____ I treat others, as I would like to be treated.

Total Yes Responses _____

Total No Responses _____

Spiritual Connectedness

_____ I live the spiritual values in which I believe.

 _____ I believe in a power greater than myself.

_____ I respect others who worship in accordance with their own beliefs.

 _____ I value the meaning of life and the life of others (human and non-human).

 _____ I apply mediation or prayer in my daily life to maintain contact with my higher power.

_____I understand life’s mission.

Total Yes Responses _____

Total No Responses _____

 Physical Health

 _____ I value myself enough to take good care of my body.

 _____ I am effective at managing personal stress at home and at work.

 _____ I exercise at least 20 minutes a day, 3 times a week.

 _____ I dress for success.

 _____ I like the way I look and feel.

 _____ I get at least 8 hours of sleep a day.

 Total Yes Responses _____    Total No Responses _____

 Mental Agility

 _____ I maintain an open mind.

 _____ I am focused on learning continuously.

 _____ I think things through before I act.

 _____ I actively read on a daily basis to develop my mind.

 _____ I visualize my dreams and thoughts and integrate them into my plans for goal achievement.

 _____ I apply my creativity on a daily basis at work and at home.

 Total Yes Responses _____    Total No Responses _____

 Financial Wellness

 _____ I live within my means.

 _____ I am saving for retirement (401K, Roth IRA, etc.).

 _____ I always think through my purchases rather than being a compulsive buyer.

 _____ I maintain a minimum savings comparable to 6-months of income to take care of unexpected emergencies.

 _____ I maintain insurance for my home, my life, medical/dental, and my vehicles.

 _____ I save for purchases rather than charging to my credit card.

 Total Yes Responses _____    Total No Responses _____

 Now that you have completed the Life Balance exercise, review your responses for each category and enter your results below, then calculate your totals. Divide your total Yes responses for each area of your life by the total number of Questions listed below. This will result in your Life Balance Score for each area of your life.

Looking at your Life Balance Scores, would you say that your life is in balance? Are you balanced in one area more than the others? Or, are you equally balanced in all areas? Think of people you know, how balanced do you believe they are? If you find they are balanced in all areas, is your perception of them, that they are successful and liked? 

A person who has a balanced life tend to be happier with their life, they make friends easier, are more successful in life, and have the ability to develop better relationships with others. In the business-world, they are respected for their ability to effectively lead people and achieve organizational goals more effectively. From a monetary point of view, they may not necessarily be the wealthiest, but guaranteed they consider their enjoyment of life, their family, and their relationships with others as their wealth. What they value greatly influences their team. The more they value, the more powerful the results, the more effective they are as a leader.

? Copyright – Allen Larsen 2009 | All rights reserved