Acceptance: Friend or an Enemy of Change?
Pallavi Kunwar
Environmental Engineer | Appropriate Technologies| Humanitarian Engineering| Climate Smart Solutions | Voluntary Carbon Market | Climate Finances
For the longest time, I thought acceptance was the ultimate betrayal of ambition. “If I accept this, it means I’m okay with it—and I’m definitely NOT okay with it!” Whether it was broken systems, cultural beliefs, or my boss’s peculiar way of doing things, I resisted acceptance like my life depended on it.
In my mind, acceptance equaled defeat. It felt like settling for less, surrendering ambition, or giving up the fight for change. And honestly, who could blame me?
But here’s the thing: resisting everything, all the time, is exhausting. Constantly fighting reality without stopping to understand it doesn’t make you a hero—it makes you tired.
Over time, I discovered a powerful truth: acceptance isn’t the end of ambition—it’s the beginning of strategy. It’s not about liking the situation; it’s about acknowledging reality so you can move forward.
Acceptance as the Fuel for Change
Acceptance doesn’t mean you stop fighting—it means you start fighting smarter. By letting go of frustration about what should be and focusing on what is, you gain clarity to create meaningful change.
1. Societal Change
Working on gender inequality projects, I used to feel overwhelmed by the deep-rooted biases. My instinct was to resist these norms head-on, which only created more pushback.
?? When I accepted that these beliefs wouldn’t change overnight, I found a better way: starting small, building trust, and planting seeds of change. Acceptance didn’t stop progress—it sparked it.
2. Cultural Beliefs
Cultural traditions can feel unchangeable, especially when they seem impractical in today’s world. I used to resist them, thinking, “Why are we still doing this?”
?? Then I realized that acceptance doesn’t mean agreeing; it means respecting the emotional significance these beliefs hold. That respect became the key to finding solutions that honored both tradition and innovation.
3. Workplace Dynamics
Ever had a boss who micromanages or insists on doing things the old-school way? My go-to response was to resist, resist, resist. Spoiler: They didn’t change.
?? When I accepted their style and adapted mine, everything shifted. Instead of wasting energy on frustration, I focused on collaboration. Turns out, acceptance isn’t surrender—it’s efficiency.
4. The Small Stuff
Acceptance as the Door to Happiness
Here’s the unexpected bonus: acceptance isn’t just a strategy for change—it’s a pathway to peace of mind.
Family and Friends
We all have that friend who’s always late or that family member who loves stirring the pot. For years, I resisted, trying to “fix” them. ?? Accepting people as they are doesn’t mean condoning bad behavior. It simply means letting go of the illusion that you can control them. And honestly? It’s liberating.
Ego Check
Acceptance hurts because it challenges your ego. It feels like giving up, but it’s really about letting go. Once you move past that discomfort, you realize that acceptance isn’t a weakness—it’s a strength.
The Dual Role of Acceptance
Acceptance can feel like a frenemy:
Here’s the shift in perspective that changed my approach: Acceptance isn’t the end—it’s the foundation. It’s not about giving up the fight for change; it’s about starting from a place of understanding.
Final Thought
Acceptance is hard. It’s uncomfortable, humbling, and often ego-crushing. But it’s also empowering, liberating, and, dare I say, necessary.
So whether you’re tackling societal norms, cultural beliefs, or your boss’s never-ending quirks, remember: Acceptance isn’t surrender—it’s strategy. It’s the door to meaningful change and, yes, happiness.
What about you? Where has acceptance been your unexpected ally in driving change—or finding peace? Let’s share and grow together. ??
#Leadership #GrowthMindset #AcceptanceAndChange #Happiness
I help students become better communicators. I teach, write, and research.
2 个月I find so much wisdom in your writing. I think I have also come out of trying to change things and accepting things as they are. Thank you for sharing! I love it.
Environmental Engineer | Senior Program & Research Assistant at IIDS
3 个月I'll accept your working style if you adapt to mine. That has to be my key takeaway from this article ??