abundance, receiving & allowing ?

Happy Wednesday humans!

Is anyone else thinking "how on earth is it already August 17th??".

Here am I, preparing to write about abundance and can't help but notice the sinking feeling that I have about the scarcity of time... are we in a time warp?!

If you're experiencing this, know that I'm right there with you.

Time is truly our most precious resource. Why? Because it's not renewable. Thus, it's only natural to feel like it's slipping away from us, especially in a society that overvalues moving at a fast pace.

Yet the belief that there isn't enough time is not one that is empowering.

When you hear someone (or yourself) say "there just aren't enough hours in the day", how does that make you feel? I'm not a betting person but if I was, I'd go all in and say that it makes you feel pretty darn crappy. Am I right?

The cool thing about time is that no matter what your beliefs are about it, it's going to keep on passing by. Given that a belief is simply an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists, we have a unique opportunity: beliefs can be changed!

What if we tried on a new belief about time? One that made us feel empowered about how we view our most precious resource? One that inspires us to spend our time on earth wisely?

I once heard someone say:

There is always enough time to do the right things.

Whoa ??. Talk about a powerful belief system.

You might be thinking, Joanne - that's a nice idea but how could that possibly hold true? I've got a bajillion things to do and there simply isn't enough time in the day to get it all done.

My response to that would be, you're right. There isn't enough time to get it all done. Thankfully, there is enough time to get the right things done. The question is, do you know what those right things are?

If I ever find myself in a downward spiral thinking that there isn't enough time, it's because of this: I've lost sight of what really matters and, inadvertently, have started treating *everything* with equal importance.

No two things are equally important.

Often when we start living our lives from this place of scarcity, we manage to do everything except for the very things we say are the most important - like making time for ourselves, our loved ones, and the meaningful activities that truly bring us joy.

This is why I'm an advocate for creating powerful outcomes and developing a practice of coming back to them, over and over again. The challenge is that most of us haven't been trained to think in outcomes. In a culture that is obsessed with productivity, we have a tendency to reward activities which only reinforces the very thing we are trying to do away from.

Create your week using powerful outcomes

If you're tired of letting to-do lists run your life, here is a 7-step framework to help you take charge of your week:

1?? Without looking at your calendar, reflect on what you really want to achieve this week:

• What experiences do you want to have?
• What emotional states do you want to experience?
• Who do you want to connect with?
• Who do you want to serve?
• What impact do you want to create?
• How do you want to grow?

Jot down whatever comes to mind.

2?? Using your brainstorm from Step 1, identify 3-5 major themes. These themes can be translated into outcomes. Here are some examples from my week:

• Creating financial abundance.
• Delivering impact to my clients.
• Building meaningful relationships in business.

Note that these are broad and do not fall into traditional goal setting frameworks, like SMART goals. This is purposeful. You want your outcomes to be broad enough to capture the essence of your desired experience. This makes it easier for you to see how your day to day activities connect to your desired outcomes, leaving you with a feeling of progress. That feeling carries over into the next thing, ultimately building momentum throughout your week.

Tell me that this is not infinitely better than feeling constantly behind ??. Let's continue.

3?? Without looking at your calendar, identify what activities would help you move towards your outcomes. Continuing with my example, I slotted all of my business meetings under "building meaningful relationships in business" and all of my client work under "delivering impact to my clients".

4?? It's now time to open your calendar. Scan for commitments that are not already on your list and add them to the appropriate outcome. If you find yourself with a commitment that does not fit into an outcome, place it in a parking lot.

5?? Here comes the hard part - decision making time! Review the activities within each outcome and identify 1-3 that are most likely to move the needle forward. Using my client deliverable example, it's clear to me that some of the activities are absolutely necessary because they are time sensitive, whereas there are others that theoretically can wait until next week should the need arise. It's also time to review your parking lot to see where these activities fit. Perhaps you need to create a new outcome? Or (this part is scary), you may need to defer/delete them!

6?? Schedule it. My belief is that if it's important, it should be in your calendar. If you want to get fancy, you can categorize using colours. Here are some examples from my calendar: personal - spirituality, relationships, health, financial abundance; business - systems, client time, business development, administration.

7?? This is arguably the most important step. Track your time. I update my iCal throughout the day to reflect how I actually spent my time. You could also use a timekeeping application, like Clockify (I love this for client work). I know it sounds onerous but trust me on this, if you aren't monitoring and measuring how you are spending your time, how do you expect to find solutions? This is not to shame yourself for checking one email and then getting sucked into your mailbox for 55 minutes. This is to get connected with the truth - and you know what I always say.

The truth will set you free.

I get that this is intellectually easy to understand but can be challenging in practice, simply because it requires a radically different way of thinking and changing habits takes consistent practice. That's why starting in September, we will be launching a series of free community events that help you, the busy changemaker, take these tools and put into practice in real time.

Onto abundance

Each year, I select a word or series of words to represent the essence of how I envision my year unfolding. This year, I chose: becoming, abundance and magic ?.

For me, abundance is first and foremost a state of mind. When I am connected to the mental state of abundance, I operate from my highest self - one that is creative and resourceful. The opposite of that - operating from a place of scarcity - leaves me uncreative and unresourceful. That's why I know that the most effective way for me to create impact in my work (and life) is to maintain being in an abundant state.

I believe that:

Abundance is the continuous flow of resources.

For this to be true, there must be a seamless flow of giving and receiving.

Thanks to a few decades of cultural conditioning, I've evolved into an amazing giver. I'm happy to admit that being a giver is engrained into my identity. It's part of who I am. If I'm honest, I love this part of me. Giving to others brings me a tremendous amount of joy. That's why make a living being a catalyst for sustainable, positive social impact.

Receiving... well, that's a different story. I recall being a little girl being told not to take too much from others, even if they were offering, because it would imply that I was greedy. Or worse - needy. I was raised to value self sufficiency. "Be the strong independent woman", they (society) said. While intentions were good, the long term impact can translate into one's biggest abundance block.

Often, when I am on the receiving end of someone else's generosity, I become squeamish. It makes me very uncomfortable. Most of the times, I feel guilty. The inner narrator in my head tells me that I am putting that person out and now I "owe" them something. I know this makes little logical sense because when I give, I have zero expectations of getting anything in return. Why would that same logic not apply to those who want to give to me? Yet, I continue to resist.

As I dove deeper into this, I saw that I have rules and conditions around receiving. I'm actually totally okay with receiving from specific people, in very specific circumstances. My receiving blocks exist in situations where I perceive that I have not "earned" whatever I am about to receive.

Bringing this back to business

Knowing what I just shared, how do you think I feel about charging for my services? More specifically, how confident do you think I feel for charging what I charge for my services? How much ease do you think someone with these blocks experiences when talking to potential clients?

It doesn't take a genius to see that having a resistance to receiving can manifest itself in self destructive behaviours in business.

In discovering this, I knew I had to make a change.

My business is the vehicle for creating social impact at scale and in order to do that, it has to thrive - and so do I! It was time to rewrite my rules about receiving.

Important?? I'd like to clarify that abundance does not only translate into financial abundance. Abundance so much more than that. Living in abundance means being abundant in love, living with ease, creativity, opportunities, partnerships, support, possibilities, groundedness - of life itself!

When I am living in a state of abundance, I make better decisions because I am operating from a place of spaciousness. I can connect to my inner wisdom and take inspired, aligned actions towards my goals. I feel safe to surrender to what is not in my control and trust that I can figure things out.

The opposite can be said about living in a place of scarcity. This is where anxiety and fear take control of the wheel. They say never say never but let's be real. Never has anxiety and fear lead me to a quality decision.

When I tell clients it's time to break up with busy, what I really mean is it's time to tap into the energy of abundance. I'm committed to helping the collective break free of this broken "hustle" paradigm and lead to us to a brighter, more fulfilling life.

As I prepared to attend an Abundance & Receiving Entrepreneur Retreat late July, I crafted the following intention:

It's August 10, 2022 and I have let go of the guilt that I feel when someone does something kind for me or someone is generous towards me. I have let go of not feeling worthy - or that I need to earn my worth. I have let go of thinking I need to give in order to receiving. I have received in my life ease in calling in support when I need. I have received connection to people who really get me and can offer me support. I have received unconditional love. I am grateful for the freedom that I have created for myself. I have grateful for my adventure in Kelowna. I am grateful for my new friends who hold space for me.

They aren't kidding when they say your environment is everything. Being immersed in a community of conscious entrepreneurs who are willing to face their shadows while building soul-aligned businesses for 4 days was truly an abundant experience.

The mastermind sessions were pure magic. It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable in a space like that. The reward that awaits on the other side is radical generosity. I was amazed by the quality of probing questions and support that was reciprocated to each person who shared. This space was proof that everyone has wisdom to offer and how life, in itself, is abundant. I couldn't help but think, what if every leader had a space like this? How different would our world be if we could come together and collectively problem solve in a way that brings us closer together??

I digress.

3 doorways to receiving

• Let go of judgements. Throughout the weekend, I noticed how quickly I was to make a judgement about a person or a situation. This is what the mind does - it labels things. Those labels can be helpful because it allows us to 'file information' in the proper compartments. At the same time, those labels can be limiting if we treat them as the whole truth. The reality is, when we hold onto judgements, we are likely doing it because at some level, it helps us feel safe. Being in a group this size did in fact make me nervous and beneath the nerves was a childhood longing to be accepted. Bringing my awareness to this allowed me to give myself what I needed (reassurance) and through that, it became easier to soften my judgements. As the labels slipped away, it felt more natural to be more curious, and that curiosity was the doorway to a new possibility. When I got out of my head and into my heart, I was able to create deep, meaningful moments with others (and myself). I allowed myself to receive what was already there, in the moment.

Where are you presently holding judgement in your life? Perhaps towards a colleague, a friend or a loved one? Or maybe towards yourself? Reflect on why that judgement is arising. What purpose does it serve? Perhaps it's here to protect you. If so, what is it protecting you from? Who would you be without that judgement? What exists for you on the other side of judgement?

• Ask for help. Learning to ask for support has been a fundamental part of my education on abundance. This weekend, I found myself in a few situations where I needed help with something. I'm not talking big stuff. One example is that I needed help with properly closing the clasp on my bathing suit. I noticed how uncomfortable it was for me to ask for help, even with such a menial request. It seems so silly, I know, but if you're someone who has been conditioned to be "independent" and has been rewarded for being a "high achiever" most of your life, I would go out on a limb to say that, to some extent, you similarly take pride in doing things on your own and, consequently, may drag out asking for help.

When is the last time you verbalized needing support? At what stage in knowing you needed help did you call in for that support? Was it immediately? Or did you allow yourself to spin your wheels? Or did you wait until you were exhausted and on the verge of giving up before making the ask?

• Forgiveness. Forgiveness is not about condoning what has happened nor does it mean forgetting what happened. Forgiveness also does not mean lowering the standards that you hold for yourself and what you accept in your life. So what is forgiveness? Forgiveness is being willing to release the energetic hold that a past situation has on you. Forgiveness is about bringing neutrality to how you view the situation. It's saying this no longer has power over me. Holding onto emotions that do not serve us ultimately blocks us from receiving what we really desire. About a month ago, I came to the stark realization that if I wanted a change in a very specific area of my life, I needed to look backwards and reflect on what I was holding onto that no longer served me. Since then, I've been intentionally working on forgiving various people from my past - including past versions of myself.

Do a mental scan of people in your life - both past and present. Notice how your body changes as you bring them to your mind's eye. Do you feel calm? Do you feel tense? What happens to your heart rate? These signals can show you where you are still holding resistance towards others (and yourself). Reflect on what purpose this resistance serves. Ask yourself: "What do I gain from this? What would I need to believe in order to let this go? Who would I be without it?"

I carry these 3 lessons with me into my day to day and am actively working on integrating them at a deeper level as I move through my entrepreneurial journey.

Allowing

If giving and receiving are two sides of the same coin, then allowing is the gateway between them.

This weekend enabled me to see that when I live in a state of love, compassion and surrender, I create space to allow in what is waiting to be received. This is why the lessons that I have shared center around reflecting inwards rather than strategies in how to change the outer world.

Gratitude

A big part of living in a state of abundance is embodying gratitude. While our minds may default to what's missing (FYI - negativity bias is a real thing!), we can intentionally train ourselves to look for what is great. Notice that I said embodying - not practicing. Writing a list of things that you are grateful for is a wonderful entry point into practicing gratitude. Learning to notice in real time and connecting with the emotion of gratitude in that moment is embodiment.

What can you be grateful for in this very moment?

For me, I am grateful for these super cool humans who I got to spend my August long weekend with and for the friendships and partnerships that I know will blossom as time unfolds. Most importantly, I'm grateful for myself for continuing to show up to do the work - both inner and outer.

Until next time... ???

p.s. know someone who needs to hear this message of abundance? what are you waiting for? share this newsletter, share the love ??