A-Gay-Ny Aunt #16

A-Gay-Ny Aunt is a weekly column written by Gina Battye - about navigating work, relationships, family and feelings, your sexuality and gender and being your Authentic Self in a chaotic and often confusing world.

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What can I do to show that I want to be a non-binary ally when assigning labels to myself is a real trigger for me?

Hello there,

Ah, labels. I have a thing about labels too...

Let's talk about labels for a moment.

Labels can help people to 'understand' your life experience. They can allow us to relate to one another and build connection. But they can also be a destructive force, when unconscious bias creeps in as we make assumptions and stereotype.

From a young age, we begin to accumulate labels for ourselves: daughter, son, mother, father, gay, straight, trans, boy, girl, non-binary, creative, unlucky, student, shy – you get the idea.

When someone asks what you do, you are a health worker, teacher, lawyer.

We HEAR these labels in every day life and relate to them. We USE these labels to describe who we are and our experience of life. And we use these labels to understand OTHER people's experiences too.

Pronouns and gendered language are just one example of this.

If we are not self-aware, we can become defined by our labels.

Back to your question.

Being an ally can look any way you want it to. If assigning labels to yourself doesn't feel comfortable, don't do it.

There are many ways you can show your support as a non-binary ally, both publicly and on an individual basis.

The key thing is to be yourself and do the things that feel right for you.

There are a few alternative suggestions in these two previous columns.

For public support at work start here: https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/a-gay-ny-aunt-15-gina-battye-she-her-

If you are looking for suggestions on how to support individuals, there are some suggestions in here: https://www.dhirubhai.net/pulse/a-gay-ny-aunt-gina-battye-she-her--5e

Hope that helps,

Gina x

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About Gina Battye

Gina Battye is a world-renowned Authenticity, Psychological Safety and LGBT+ Inclusion Consultant and Trainer for Multinational Corporations, Fortune 500s, TV, Film and the Global Press.

As a media friendly experienced expert, with an acting background, Gina's work has been featured widely in the media, including:

Sky News, BBC Radio, Forbes, Psychologies, Cosmopolitan.

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