90 Days In: A story of the search

Nearly 6 months ago I knew that my restaurant management position was slowly but surely coming to an end, and I began the search for a more stable, corporate position that would help me make good use of my skills on and off paper. I use the term search loosely because as you'll see, my job hunt is unlike many I've seen. And to be frank, I couldn't handle the grind at the restaurant for another minute and in an effort to regain a positive mental health status, I made some big changes.

Yesterday I celebrated 90 days at Burns and McDonnell. I couldn't even tell you what I applied for, but when a recruiter reached out stating I had the skills they were looking for, I was overjoyed and committed to following this through. Mind you, this was also about 2 months after I had already left the management position and found myself in a bar up the street slinging drinks for cash.

Leaving a job before having another lined up is a matter of lengthy discussion I've had with family and friends. Is it the right move, probably not. Do I seem to take that path every time I find myself in this situation, absolutely. I'll always be on the "wrong" end of that convo, but my post-graduate journey has led me to believe that I haven't faltered too greatly in my decision making thus far.

2 weeks before I graduated college, I got a call saying that the externship I had been planning on moving for was no longer an option and I was about to graduate without a job lined up. At the time, I was terrified. Graduation felt like the real beginning of adulthood, and I was not prepared to stare bills and loans in the face without a steady paycheck. Fortunately, my last semester of college was light (I could have graduated early but chose not to...are we seeing a theme?), and I spent the last two weeks on every job search outlet applying to anything with marketing, communications or administration in the description.

Side Note: I refused to become a journalist at a local paper despite having a degree from one of the top journalism schools in the country because I believed entry-level journalist weren't paid nearly enough for the lifestyle I wanted.

The stress of the search left a lasting?impression and the hastiness of my decision felt like a miracle in the moment, but later lead to my demise when I realized I took the job for every reason but the right one. I needed to stay close to my then boyfriend while he finished school; it was in healthcare, which would make my mom happy; it had marketing in the title, so there was another box ticked. Full transparency, I was fired. They were really nice about it and did make an effort to help me get back on track after position changes and a lack of connection with coworkers, but I was checked out and experiencing my first mental health downward spiral after I realized all of those reasons didn't matter if I wasn't happy.

Nearly 6 years later I am now one of the only people I know that purposefully takes time in between jobs to prepare, plan and wait for the best opportunity to present itself.

I took another 2 months in between that first position and my restaurant management job. The training program and potential for rapid growth was enticing and I wanted a new environment with people I could better relate to. Every promise was fulfilled and I began to learn and grow with the restaurant group immediately. I received 3 promotions and raises in the first year. I made the move to Detroit, was able to afford an apartment downtown, and when the pandemic hit, I was fully supported to move back to Columbus because it was what I wanted. But as any restaurant industry employee knows, the pandemic changed everything. Working in the restaurant was never the same and it made it easier to actualize yet another career change.

Mental health has been the major deciding factor on my job choice over the years. Before I left the restaurant management position, I spent 8 weeks receiving in-person treatment for an eating disorder. 5 days a week I would spend 6 hours with counselors, dieticians and other patients divulging every thought and feeling while learning skills to make my way to recovery. Every Friday after treatment, as well as Saturday and Sunday, I would head back to the restaurant and work my 10 hours to keep my health insurance and have some sort of money coming in. There isn't a better way to say it, it was a lot. So, after a while, I decided to do what I do best, take a break to regroup and refresh.

I didn't hit the ground running with the job search the way I once did. I would have moments of fear and panic that I wasn't going to be able to pay my mortgage or that I had made a huge mistake leaving a company that treated good enough for nearly 4 years. But I didn't want to find myself in the same position in a few years, mentally drained and on the brink of a breakdown.

Burns and McDonnell has given me a balance I forgot was possible. It's not the grind that I became accustomed to in the restaurant, but the transferable skills astounded me. One of the main reasons I got the interview was my ability to deal with people as a restaurant manager. All the conversations with my mother telling me, "Working in a restaurant wasn't a good long-term goal" felt vindicated when it was why they wanted me. The cherry on top, my now supervisor applauded me for taking time in between positions. My team is communicative, appreciative and constantly checking in to make sure my workload is manageable.

I understand that not everyone is fortunate enough to take time in between jobs due to financial reasons. I know that is always the # 1 concern my family has when they get the phone call saying their daughter is off in Columbus assumably galivanting around without a job to hold her down. Fortunately, my mental health isn't attached to money, it's time.

With my new position, I have time for me. I have time to take care of the little things that fell by the wayside, like cleaning my floors. I don't spend my days off laying in bed all day because I told myself my body needed the rest after running around the restaurant all weekend. I can more easily plan a trip home to see my family. I can have the night to myself to plan a dinner with friends or stay home and cuddle my cat (I also finally allowed myself to get a pet). And when I want to make some extra cash and scratch that itch to be around a bunch of strangers enjoying some amazing food and drinks, I'll bartend once or twice a week. I don't have it all down just yet, but I'm working towards a more balanced life every day.

I'm not going to tell you that your path will or should look anything like mine. No two paths will be the same, but I choose to believe things tend to work out the way they are supposed to. At 27, I have been very fortunate to have gained experience in different fields and worked with people I would have never crossed paths with that have helped me grow into the person I am today. There is great value in every job opportunity and it's always easier to see it when you're bringing your best self to work each and every day.