9 Questions to Stop Asking and What to Replace Them With
Devin Keane
Making meaningful connection a habit | Building the positive BeReal | Writing the newsletter for meaningful relationships
Your questions are turning conversations to a dead end—here’s how to start asking the right questions.
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Over the last five years, I've been lucky to spend a lot of my time around my cousins' young children. Right now, all five are ages two through five. One thing that becomes clear after spending just a few minutes with them is that they are endless question-asking machines.
Some of them make no sense at all…
I did my best to think back to when I was at that age. I couldn't remember any specific questions I asked but I certainly remember never feeling shy to ask them anytime and anywhere.
It turns out, the average kid asks over 40,000 questions between the ages of two and five.
But at some point in adolescence, that comfort with asking questions fades. Asking questions becomes a strangely vulnerable activity. Almost as if we're always admitting to not knowing something.
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That becomes a bigger pill to swallow when society tells us
Because if we do show who we really are or the knowledge we lack, others might not like us.
We then either avoid questions that don't show how well-informed we are, or we stick to the safe and boring ones like "what do you do?" or "what's up?"
In the worst case, we don't ask any questions at all.
How can we break free of these bad questions and refocus on the right ones?
Avoiding the Worst Kinds of Questions
"Perspective taking is untrustworthy but perspective receiving works quite well. I don’t get to know you by peering into your soul, it's because I have a skill of asking the sorts of questions that will give you a chance to tell me who you are." - David Brooks
The worst kinds of questions come from...
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Best of luck building,
Devin
Applied physics.(JOIN ME) the work presented here is entirely new
10 个月Or we could simply redefine nature.... simplify.... nature https://www.dhirubhai.net/posts/mark-alan-bartholomew-brandnewphysics_and-the-headlines-read-as-morality-activity-7196476293670940672-FYed?utm_source=share&utm_medium=member_desktop
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10 个月Curiosity goes a long way in building relationships, Devin Keane. Most people's favorite subject is themselves. Asking questions is a key way to connect with others. But not through trite ones like "How are you doing?"
Making meaningful connection a habit | Building the positive BeReal | Writing the newsletter for meaningful relationships
10 个月?? full edition here: https://www.build-better.io/p/asking-the-right-questions