8 UNCOMFORTABLE TRUTHS that I’ve learned the hard way... but now live by.

1. CONTENTMENT IS WHERE YOU ARE NOW - OR NOWHERE AT ALL. 

It's not a new relationship, it's not a new job, it's not a completed goal, and it's not a new car or a travel destination. 

Until you give up on the idea that happiness, or being content is somewhere else, it will never be where you are. 

True contentment is a deep-seated sense of accepting who and where you are at any given moment. Too often, we get so entrenched in our busy lives that we don’t even notice where we are now. When we finally come up for air, we focus more on where we were or where we want to be instead of where we are now. Does that sound familiar?

Sometimes we stay focused on the future because we imagine ourselves healthier, slimmer, happier, etc., but the only way to get to that state is to take that "content" action right now. 

 2. QUITTING IS FOR WINNERS 

Contrary to popular opinion, quitting is for winners.

Knowing when to quit, change direction, pivot, leave a toxic situation, demand more from life, give up on something that isn't working and move on, is a very important skill that people who win at life all seem to have. They know when to pivot. 

Don’t quit because it's hard. 

Everything gets hard at times. 

Quit because it’s not working for you and your vision. Keep true to the direction of your goals - but it’s ok to pivot and change lanes to reach your vision. 

 3. IF THEY REALLY WANT IT, THEY WILL. 

If you apply pressure, they'll do what you want them to.

If you take the pressure off, you'll see what they'd rather do.

Never waste time forcing something. When people are truly inspired, you never need to motivate them with force. 

Let them go. Move on.

There are plenty of people who’s heart will align and be 100% in it - whether that’s work, love or business.  

It can be a whole range of things but you know — from a corporate executive of 12 years to top tier companies into a lifestyle entrepreneur living in Bali. I find myself now gravitating towards companies that have a very strong social angle because of what’s happening today. The stars have finally aligned.

 4. TAKING NO RISK IS THE BIGGEST RISK OF ALL 

Mark Zuckerberg famously said: "The biggest risk is not taking any risk. In a world that's changing really quickly, the only strategy that is guaranteed to fail is not taking risks." I rather think he might be onto something.

You have to risk failure to succeed. 

You have to risk rejection to be accepted.

You have to risk heartbreak to love.

If you're always avoiding risk, you're risking missing out on life - which is the biggest risk of all. 

 5. CALL YOURSELF OUT 

The most common reason why people keep making the same mistakes is because their insecure ego prevents them from taking responsibility for their own bullshit, their own toxic traits and their own mistakes.

You have to call yourself out.

Every major change I’ve encountered in my last 10 years is the direct result of calling myself out.

This is where transformation occurs. As the saying goes, being sick and tired of being sick and tired. When it comes from outside, it can be shrugged off, and often times it is. When it comes from within, the fire to change burns soooooo much hotter.

Calling yourself out means you care more about your future, your progress and your happiness, than just protecting your ego.

There is something invigorating and powerful about calling your own shots. Especially hen the shots are fired internally. No one else to blame.

Then you just watch your life take a rapid road to joy & success when you start taking radical responsibility for all of it. 

 6. CLOSURE IS A CHOICE 

Closure isn't an apology, or justice, or answers.

That's insecurity. 

If the situation made you feel shit or awful, seeking closure by reopening it is insanity.

Closure isn't something they can give you.

Closure is more important than trying to understand why something happened the way it did.

Closure is internal.

Closure is moving on.

Closure is the beginning.

Closure is YOUR choice.

 7. IF YOU'RE HAPPY ALONE, YOU’LL BE HAPPIER TOGETHER 

One has told me that the key to a successful relationship is to have one with your self first.

If you want to get on the path to loving yourself. Do things for yourself that feel good. When you feel good, you radiate goodness. Everyone else wants to be around you and you do not lose yourself in relationships.

There is no type of love or affection that can fill the void in a person who doesn't fully love themselves already.

There is no independence in dependency.

There is no personal security in attaching yourself to a secure person to fill in the missing pieces. 

Until you have a healthy loving relationship with yourself, you won't make healthy loving decisions about someone else.

 8. IT’S NOT YOUR JOB TO FIX DAMAGED PEOPLE

Your responsibility to help someone will never outweigh their responsibility to help themselves. 

But, it's worth asking yourself why you resonated so strongly with someone that so desperately needed "fixing" in the first place. 

Often, our own toxic romantic and non-romantic attachments tell a story about an issue we have within ourselves. 

"Our job is not to fix people.

Our job is to love people.

Know there is a difference."