7 WAYS TO LOVE WHAT YOU DO ON A MONDAY MORNING

What if living a 'wild and precious life' means more than moving somewhere wild and exotic, and doing wild and crazy things?

A few years ago, I was sitting on my sofa on New Years’ Day, chatting to my sister and husband feeling a bit glum about the world. We’d had an incredibly busy Christmas and I was looking down the barrel of very busy January in a job I didn’t enjoy. I asked them what new year’s resolutions they had made and the pair of them looked at me in surprise

‘We don’t have any. Yours should be to get a new job.’

Really? I could do that could I? I could change what I was doing?

I immediately started to think of all the reasons why I couldn’t - I’d done a lot of training to do the job I didn’t enjoy - nine years in all. I couldn’t think of what else I could do, where I could do it or if anyone would want me to do it.

Then I came across the last line from Mary Oliver’s poem ‘The Summer Day’

‘Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?’

That stopped me in my tracks. She was right, my life is so precious, and I only have one.

I have friends who have been through long, drawn out therapy for cancer who can testify to that. I realised that no-one on this earth can plan my life except me, and as such, I am responsible for holding, shaping and making this precious life as wholesome and creative as it can be.

But wild?

Hold on a minute – don’t you have to do something crazy and incredibly brave to live a wild life? Set up a medical programme in Madagascar? Live in the Indian Ocean running a recycling and sustainability project? I know people who have done all of these things.

This isn’t an option for me, I have stuff going on here - the kids are happy in their schools, plus I quite like it here!

So what did I do?

The first step was to own the problem, I wasn’t satisfied, change was needed. I started to explore my options, my skills and my passions.

I tried to be curious. What made people happy at work? What did other people love to do? What were their common causes of pain? I saw a pattern – that people like me felt trapped, overwhelmed and sometimes helpless.

As a GP, I was constantly signing people of work with stress, many of them ended up on medication, taking a lot of time off and eventually leaving their jobs. I noticed that a lot of these people needed support to make the changes needed - often in looking after themselves, having boundaries, and being able to prioritise their workload. This is something that GPs just don’t have the time to offer.

I began running wellbeing workshops and training sessions on resilience and coaching. I started to coach teams who were having issues with communication, resilience and workload. I soon noticed that this made a real difference.

But still there was that question

How do you have a ‘wild and precious’ life on a Monday morning in the 9-5 and 24/7 you already inhabit?

I went away on a business retreat to the Alps to think this through (throughly recommended for some head space https://www.thehappystartupschool.com)

While I was away, I was able to do a lot of thinking, chatting and reflecting and realised that, for most of us, having a ‘wild and precious’ life will not involve moving away, taking massive risks and starting anew somewhere wild and exotic.

What it would mean however, is living a life true to your interests, passions and callings. It involves making those small changes that enable you to live generously, freely and without inhibition within the life you already have.

So what have I learned?

Well, there’s no silver bullet. There’s no one self-help book that can help you (although I can recommend a bunch). But you can do small things to help you thrive in the work you are already doing:

Learn to say ‘no’ so that you can say a huge ‘yes’ to the things that matter

My diary used to be open to whatever and whoever asked first. I now jealously guard time off and try to live by Derek Sivers' rule ‘It’s either a ‘hell yeah’, or a 'no’

Take control over those things which you can control and stop stressing over the things you can’t

If you need to learn more skills to do what you want to do, find a way to make this happen. So your boss has never offered you some extra training to progress at work? Look for the course yourself, find out how much it will be, how much time is needed, plan how others will cover your job, explain why this will benefit your organisation. Make it easier for them to say ‘yes’. Or fund it yourself.

If you work for an organisation which is never going to have the resources to enable you to do what you want to do, then find one that does. You have control over that.

Do more of the things you love and less of the things you hate

A local hospital consultant was complaining about how much time she spent in the evenings peer reviewing journals and writing articles. This wasn’t necessary for her particular job and she found it time consuming and boring. She thought it might be good for her career in the long run.

She decided instead to focus on teaching and training which she enjoyed doing. Her involvement with training eventually got her noticed, increased her influence and helped progress her career.

We all have to do some stuff that we hate. That's life. But as far as possible, try to do those things you love at work. Have a conversation with your manager about how you could do more of the projects that you enjoy. Volunteer for things and be proactive in making suggestions, set progress goals that focus on tasks you enjoy, and where possible give others the opportunity to do the stuff that you don't like - you never know, this might be the opportunity they are waiting for.

Take inspiration from others and the universe, and listen to your own soul

Read some things that were written before computers existed. Uncover some ancient wisdom, practice prayer, meditation, mindfulness, gratitude – whatever works for you to connect with the deeper truths within the Universe. You’ll be amazed at the inspiration and ideas that come to you in these times.

Work out what your skills and passions are....

The things that I was passionate about and interested in weren’t what I spent most of my time doing. It was this mismatch that was causing me misery and dissatisfaction.

....then work out where your skills and passions overlap with what the world needs

I have a great passion for singing. I do a great ‘Let it Go!’ in the shower. This is not what the world needs. 

I also love connecting ideas about personal resilience, health and wellbeing with coaching, leadership development and team performance in the workplace. This is what works for people.

So spend some time thinking about the skills and passions you already have which others value. Work out what your organisation really needs and find out how you can use do more of it in your workplace.

Find that sweet spot and then go for it!

By taking these small steps in your own world you can begin to live a wild and precious life in the 9 - 5 and 24/7 you already inhabit. This won’t come to you overnight. It’s a journey and will take time and effort. After all, the first line of the quote from the poem is

‘Tell me, what is it you PLAN to do......’

Take the time needed to plan

Put time aside to do this, spend time thinking, talk to friends and family, explore. Get a coach, make a plan.

I can guarantee that it won’t work out in the way that you think it will, but you never know where the journey might take you.

How is this working out for me?

My life is not perfect by any means. I still get overloaded, I forget a lot of this on a daily basis (ask my family) but I’m in a much better place - and I’m still on the journey.

I still live in the same place, I still do some of the same things, AND everything is different. I get to go in to businesses and organisations and help people thrive at work. I get paid to share what I’m passionate about!

Oh yes, and I’m still a GP, meeting people who need to make changes to enable them to thrive in their own lives. That hasn’t changed but it’s become part of my story, part of the wild and precious life that I hope to live out every Monday morning.

I founded Wild Monday to help individuals, managers and teams plan to live a wild and precious right where they are, in the 9-5 and 24/7 they already inhabit. I would love it if you would join us in this quest. Do contact us if you’d like to know more [email protected] www.wildmonday.co.uk twitter @drrachelmorris