7 Strategies for Building Mental Resilience in Challenging Times

As Realtors, really, simply as people, we experience many ups and downs throughout our careers. The constant pressure to close a deal, meet deadlines, and keep up with industry trends can often leave us feeling exhausted, depleted, frustrated, overwhelmed...need I go on?

In such circumstances, I am grateful for my mental resilience, my ability to control what I pay attention to, my ability to operate with an empowering attitude.

Mental resilience is what I call the skill to be able to control my thoughts, feelings, my moods, attitudes, and approaches to any situation.

It's what allows anyone to manage their emotions and stress levels, bounce back from disappointments, and remain focused on goals.

The question then is, what can you do to build your mental resilience in challenging times? While there is no miracle solution, no instant cure, your mental resilience is like any other muscle - it can be built and strengthened over time.

Here are seven strategies that I've found helpful.

1. Focus on what you can control

In challenging times, it's easy to get caught up in things that are beyond your control. You can't predict market trends or control the decisions of your clients, but you can control your responses to them.

Focus on the actions that you can take to manage the situation, and let go of what's out of your hands.

"Don't worry, be happy" is an annoying and useless message, and at the same time, spending energy focusing on the weather (or any similarly uncontrollable event) is simply not necessary.

There are ALWAYS actions you can take when you shift from being at the effect to being proactive and focusing on taking those actions effectively will leave you with power.

2. Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is the practice of being present in the moment, without judgment. It can help you to manage stress, anxiety, and negative emotions.

Building the muscle of being present takes practice. Take a few minutes every day to breathe deeply, focus on your senses, and observe your thoughts without getting caught up in them.

This simple exercise can help you to develop mental clarity, resilience, and emotional intelligence.

Being present and acting consistent with what is happening will leave you free and empowered.

3. Cultivate a growth mindset

A growth mindset is the belief that your abilities and intelligence can be developed through hard work, dedication, and perseverance - and that there is no top to that mountain.

Embrace setbacks as learning opportunities, and view challenges as opportunities to grow. Again - it might be a cliche but coming at any situation like you can either win or learn (as opposed to win or lose) will make a massive difference.

This mindset can help you to develop a greater sense of self-awareness and confidence.

4. Build a support system

Having a strong support system can help you to navigate difficult times with more ease. Surround yourself with positive, supportive, and uplifting people who can provide you with a listening ear, advice, and encouragement.

The African proverb, if you want to go fast, go alone, if you want to go far, go together, fits here.

There is a reason every great success coach points out that you are the sum of the five people you spend the most time with.

You and I are the product of our environments. Choose yours wisely.

Whether it's friends, family, mentors, or colleagues, having a support system will help you to stay motivated, inspired, and resilient.

5. Practice self-care

Self-care is the practice of taking care of your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. This can include things like exercise, healthy eating, getting enough sleep, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.

Hustle culture is toxic for many reasons, but none more so than the lack of interest in self care.

Taking breaks, enjoying seemingly unplanned, spontaneous opportunities, and spending social time with loved ones, all are critical if you are to be mentally resilient enough to perform at a high level.

When you prioritize self-care, you increase your resilience, decrease stress, and improve your overall well-being.

6. Maintain perspective

In challenging times, it can be easy to lose perspective and become mired in negativity.

Try to step back and take a broader perspective of your situation. Ask yourself, "How important is this in the grand scheme of things?" and "What are the possible outcomes of this situation?"

I always ask myself, "If this doesn't work out, if everything turns to shit, if this completely crashes and burns, how long would it take me to rebuild and create something better?" I have yet to see any situation that would take me more than two years to completely rebuild.

I have found the work of Fernando Flores and Werner Erhard to be massively impactful in maintaining an empowering perspective.

Maintaining perspective can help you to stay grounded, optimistic, and solution-focused.

7. Set realistic goals

Finally, setting realistic goals can help you to stay motivated, focused, and resilient.

It is commonly understood that we will underestimate what we can accomplish in 10 years and overestimate what we will accomplish in one year.

Our brains are lousy at long term planning AND we want everything now.

Don't get sucked into playing that game.

Small, steady, repeatable changes to your actions will outperform drastic attempts to rewrite the script almost every time.

Break down your larger goals into smaller, manageable steps, and celebrate your progress along the way.

When you set achievable goals, you increase your sense of accomplishment, which can boost your confidence and resilience.

Building mental resilience is a critical skill for success.

Remember, mental resilience is not something you're born with. It's something that you can develop through practice and patience.

And like anything else you decide to practice, give yourself the same grace you'd give to a child learning to walk.

Nobody learned to walk by being yelled at, by being invalidated. In fact, every time they fell forward someone was there to cheer them on.

Be that kind of person for yourself, give yourself some grace to practice, fail, stand up, and go again. That in and of itself might be the greatest act of mental resilience.