7 Steps to Getting Out of the “Clutches” of the Waiting Place

by Shariann Tom

“You can get so confused that you'll start in to race down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace and grind on for miles across weirdish wild space, headed, I fear, toward a most useless place. The Waiting Place...”

~ Dr. Seuss

The “Waiting Place” is visited by every cancer patient, survivor, and caregiver. And, while it is not our goal to enter, it is inevitable. The Waiting Place can be filled with fear, worry, panic, or even hopelessness, as you wait for an answer, a result, or the next step – the unknown. It’s a quiet space where our monkey-brain has too much time (even for a minute) to create fear stories and pictures of a “what if…” or “doom and gloom” future. Then, the negative future story ignites a wash of emotions that feed the story and you are caught in a swirling downward spiral that can paralyze you. 

So, how do you get out of the stifling clutches of the Waiting Place whirlpool?

1. Realize that we all are going to visit the Waiting Place at some point. It’s a part of everyone’s journey through life. 
2. Notice when the fear story and emotional swirl begins. Once you notice the fear story and emotional swirl, you can do something about it. 
3. Acknowledge the fear story and emotions. Hear it out and feel the feelings, because as much as you’d like to not have the fear story and feelings swirling in you, ignoring or pushing them away will only keep them close. The goal is to release them. 
4. After you’ve heard and felt this fear story and emotions, remind yourself that this is only “one way” to see your current circumstance and that there are other options.
5. Begin to note what the other options are (by writing them down or speaking them out loud to a trusted friend or your cancer journey coach). Involving another person in this activity is helpful because we often can get stuck in the story and believe that this “is” how things are. 
6. Give yourself a chance to explore the different options until you find one that feels energizing rather than depleting. 
7. Once you’ve found the option that lets you stand in your power, choose to stand here for the next couple of days and see what happens. 

After doing these 7 steps, you may find that the Waiting Place is filled with more self-insight, self-discovery, and self-acceptance and the fear story and emotions are released. 

If you'd like what you've read, we have more to share with you. Join us for our Taste of Cancer Journey Coach Training, on June 6th, 2019 from 10am - 12noon PT, by clicking on this link: https://bit.ly/2WgLfda