7 Mistakes of Impact and Purpose

When I retired from being a professional housewife and travel entrepreneur, due to a divorce, I underwent a true transformation. Some call it the dark night of the soul, others call it a rebirth of the phoenix, or a spiritual awakening. It was all of those things. It was what I needed, to shake me out of my autopilot program and open me up to a life of purpose and passion. That was ten years ago and I've learned quite a bit since then.

Back then, I really had no idea what I was doing, other than wanting to make a big difference, a big impact on this planet. Truly. I knew nothing. I embarked on an investigation of impact and purpose through trial and error, and so, in order to perhaps save you some of your own trial and error, I will share some of my errors with you.

Since then I have hosted many family offices conference and events, founded or led several impact networks, founded a mentorship firm, and am now focused on root-level systemic transformation. Here are the 7 things I've learned along the way, in the 'framing error' category :

1. Trying to educate people on the "facts" of sustainability or impact - We humans like to present ourselves as data-driven and objective, but at the end of the day, people make decisions with their emotions, and then justify that decision with curated facts. You can talk to their minds all day, but until it reaches their heart, the actions won't transfer down into their hands. They may agree with the data, but it will remain "someone else's task" until it strikes that emotional chord.
2. Trying to create consciousness - You know you're supposed to eat healthy, exercise, or repair that broken relationship, but you don't want to feel the pain of change, consciously or unconsciously. In the same way, others avoid 'waking up' because they know that so much of their life will be disrupted, down to their base security and philosophical foundations. Very rarely does anyone choose consciousness, but rather, a crisis will bring it about. And pushing someone into a conscious awakening is a form of spiritual harassment and control that isn't aligned with sustained change.
3. Believing in a lack of sustainability solutions - there are incredibly few, and I mean incredibly few problems out there that we don't already have several viable solutions for. And even those that we lack solutions to, we are often only 2-5 years away from those solutions being available to the market. In fact, the problems lie more in the category of "wheel reinvention", as most of the inventions being developed on this planet are being made redundant by 3-4 other teams working on the same issue without having shared information through lack of knowledge of the existence of each other, or through falsified egoic thought (false superiority or competition).
4. Believing in the abundance of funds for impact - this is by far the greatest issue I see in the impact space; amazing innovations sitting on shelves collecting dust, amazing projects running dry, brilliant inventors and entrepreneurs living hand to mouth, and large organizations touting success while being in the red. The volition and passion are there, but when you peek under the kimono, there's nothing but passion and enough money for a beer. As I am a trusted person in the space (because I just speak my mind), people tell me their secrets constantly. And you know what the number one, most shameful, most pressing, most shocking secret I hear is - no matter the source? We don't have money. This is changing now, but we're not nearly there.
5. Believing that the wealthy are responsible for and capable of funding the change - First of all, most wealthy people rely on wealth managers to manage investments, and those wealth managers are highly, highly risk-averse... meaning that the word "change" is scary. Secondly, the most inspiring, revolutionary wealthy people I know have a limited scope of time and attention. They choose 1-2 topics that they know well, and are near and dear to their hearts, and invest in those. Again, these are often emotionally based decisions, but more importantly, this is all they have the mental and emotional bandwidth for. Likewise, they don't have time to due diligence all the potential investments coming their way. So one way to support the wealthy in investing for impact is to pre-due diligence the for them offers - and as always - organize, communicate, and collaborate!
6. Believing that people are already well-connected - People tell me what an amazing networker I am because I know so many people in the family office and impact spaces, and yet it's just a tiny fraction. And when I ask them - have you met so and so, who is working on the same thing you are? - they rarely ever have. It's actually quite shocking, how difficult it is for people to find the very people that could unlock their problem or potential. It's a game of luck and volume, and it's mind-meltingly inefficient. If you've ever attended a conference and collected business cards, you know what a "needle in a haystack" strategy this is. That's why I host the House of Balance
7. Building more cars without building the freeways - Yes the world needs innovations and impactful businesses, but the truth is that most of those businesses will die an undeserved death. Why? Because the ecosystem doesn't exist to support their growth. We are still functioning in silos, echo chambers, and financial deserts. There are so many cars, driving around in search of resources and clients, and running out of gas. What we need is a massive sharing of information and resources and a place to do it with full data and personal sovereignty.

And there you have it. But there's good news! This is the year, when all the networks and communities start talking and working in collaboration instead of competition. This is the year when people stop being stingy and paranoid with their contacts and start planting seeds of change and connection. This is our year people: humans. The year we say no to our fearful limitations and say yes to our shared abundance. This is where we take the reins, like the fearless children we are.