7 Habits Top Executives Do That Help Them Stay Happy, Focused, And Driven

7 Habits Top Executives Do That Help Them Stay Happy, Focused, And Driven

Everybody that's made it to the C-suite or Executive Team knows all too well the struggles and demands required to remain at that level. There's an entirely different reality than what people assume. It certainly isn't all rainbows and Unicorns!

I've seen very high achievers burn out and damn near go insane, simply because they allowed themselves to be on call 24/7. In March 2014, I received a call at 4:27 am. Yes, I remember the time because I jumped out of my skin thinking there was a family emergency. The caller had an out of state area code, so like anybody would do...I let it go to voice mail. The coach in me made me check the voice mail...just in case. I could feel the desperation in his voice. His entire message said, "Debbie, my name is 'Frank Smith, with Blah Blah Corporation.' 'Eric Reynolds' strongly suggested I give you a call. Please call back at your earliest convenience." Immediately I sprang out of bed. Not only was I excited to get a call from this well-known man, known and highly respected for his leadership ability, as well as being a top player in his Industry...there was an undeniable sense of urgency in his tone. I knew of him, but was about to get to know him on a whole different level. About ten minutes passed when I called him back. He was sitting in his car contemplating walking away from the success he busted his hump achieving.

After fifteen minutes of niceties, the real stuff began to surface. At that time he'd recently turned 48 years old. His marriage of twenty three years ended and the divorce was finalized that week. His youngest son was graduating high school in May and the realization set in that he missed out on so much time with his three kids. Instead of feeling pride for his professional accomplishments, he felt disgust and guilt. All he could see was the price he paid for not learning earlier how to create harmony between his professional and personal lives. He had an all-in or all-out way of thinking, which was why he was ready to throw his hands up and walk away from his career. I knew my job that day wasn't to delve into the great deep waters, I simply needed to talk him off the ledge (career ledge, not actual suicide).

If I told you that he was an easy client, I'd be a liar. He was determined to change, but resistant on almost every action I gave him. Once I fully earned his trust, he was all in and his life made a 360 degree change, all while continuing to grow in the profession that he truly loved. Today, almost four years later, he continues to be my client but has much different goals. He was unable to rectify his marriage and his ex-wife remarried, but he has a new found friendship with his ex-wife and her new husband. He learned that he cannot make up for lost time with his three sons, but new experiences and memories could be made...and he is very intentional about making sure his kids know that time with them is top priority to him. Professionally, he's never been as satisfied. He has become a more effective leader and chooses one up and coming employee to mentor for one year.

"Frank Smith" is an absolute success story and is still going strong. Change never occurs unless consistent, intentional actions are taken...daily, hourly, and even minute by minute.

I'd like to share the top seven habits "Frank" and many of my clients do daily that help them to stay happy, focused, and driven.

1. Identify daily priorities - Before the next day begins, have in writing (or electronically) your top three priorities for the day. Since there is no true separation of work life and personal life, the top three are mixed with work and non work priorities. Some days you'll have three work related priorities that trump personal priorities, and some day you'll have three personal priorities that trump work priorities. Regardless of the category they fall into, they are YOUR top three for the day. What this does it is sets your state of mind for the upcoming day. Such as life, things do come up without notice. When one of the unexpected situations pop up, if it trumps your top three then you'll not add to the list, but replace one of your top three's with the new one. This is key to maintaining focus and drive as you already know what takes precedence before the day begins.

2. Manage time - Everybody has the same 24 hours in a day but how you use it is what will determine your results. Top level executives didn't earn that degree of success by doing the minimally required, in fact most are initially most comfortable working long hours and six to seven days a week. Eventually, I don't care who you are...that's the recipe for burnout, breakdown, and heartache. In order to become and remain happy, focused, and driven, you must be intentional with how your time is spent...even and very importantly, sleeping. Every single work day should have time scheduled for alone time AND family time (If you aren't married or have kids, add more self-focused time). Take the time and pre-write how your day or week is going to look, before it begins. Taking control of how your days will be spent may sound tedious, at it is at first...but when you notice the positive changes that come into your life, specifically due to being intentional with your 24...this won't seem tedious at all, it'll often be your saving grace.

3. Begin with and end with Gratitude - The very first thing and very last thing they do every day is mentally or verbally express gratitude for what they have and don't have in their lives. Being grateful increases happiness instantly. You can't be grateful and a black cloud simultaneously. Gratitude will often highlight your "whys" and acknowledging your "whys" intensifies your focus, which thrusts your drive. It's a beautiful domino effect!

4. Volunteer - As a top dog executive, it's easy to get a big head...cocky/full of yourself/ a God like complex...so being intentional with keeping your feet on the ground will help you to keep a grip on reality. I'm talking about physically going to a spot and volunteering with and for people that need your time and money. Volunteering puts a lot of things into perspective. You will feel gratitude for the things and people you have in your life, which easily adds to your happiness. You will have a new found motivation, which will add to both your focus and drive. Besides being the human thing to do, volunteering adds positives, any way you look at it.

5. Choose happiness - Happiness is not connected to circumstance, it is a choice that is always available, to every single person. Being in an executive or higher position (or any position) can and does bring potentially stressful situations that if allowed will drain your life of joy. The result from choosing happiness is happiness...true happiness. When happiness is your choice, you are not only creating a happy life, you are removing the weight of stress and opening up room for focus and drive. If happiness appeared simply from holding a high position, collecting nice material things, and having a nice home...the rate of divorce, addiction, and suicide would be drastically lower. Happiness is nowhere to be found but within yourself.

6. Spend uninterrupted time with the ones you love - The hard ugly truth is your loved ones will go on with their lives, with or without you...but if you'd rather it be with you, make it happen. Unless you raised asshole kids, they will value the time you spend with them far more than the material things you buy for them. Even if it's one hour a day and one whole day on the weekend that you focus on them, it'll make all the difference in the world to them and you. Children of high level achievers know that their parent/s work a lot, but that doesn't mean their needs for attention are any different than other kids. And you, as their parent will gain a sense of purpose and the feelings of guilt will be replaced with feeling fulfilled. Making time for your spouse. Marriage does not last if it's stagnant. Your spouse needs to feel valued and prioritized by you. Chances are that if you hold a top executive position, you can afford a few date nights per month...set it up and schedule it in! The time that you put into your loved ones will come back tenfold. The happier your personal life, the happier your professional life. It's a win win.

7. Know the difference between rubber and crystal events - You're a top level executive...you are going to miss certain family events, but you don't have to miss them all. A rubber event is one that if missed, all parties involved will understand and be okay with you having to miss it. Example: Johnny's football practice. Sandy's soccer game. Your crystal events are those that are detrimental to a relationship if missed. Example: Johnny's graduation. Sandy's prom. Having a clear understanding of the level of event and communicating this to the ones that are affected will help you to remove unnecessary guilt and be able to focus on the event you are attending.

Of course, these are just scratching the surface, but even a little scratch from each of these seven will affect your life in a positive way. Delving deeper into each will absolutely change your life for the better! You didn't get to the level you are at by sitting by and letting life happen, so place that same determination towards creating a healthy work/life harmony and the results will be happiness, focus, and drive!

Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed this article and feel its helpful information, please share, like, and comment.

Debbie Dickerson is an Executive Life Coach that works with successful happy Executives and Entrepreneurs that desire more success and happiness, personally and professionally.

If you are interested in learning more about my individual or group coaching services, please contact me to schedule a brief consultation.

If you are interested in focusing specifically on work/life Harmony, I've put together an incredibly effective individual coaching 12 week program (See flyer below). Time slots are filling up quickly, please contact me today if you're interested.

















Hello Debbie, thanks for sharing this, and as a newbie Coach i can relate to this. Please allow me to point out a small slip of the pen in your article. As i am also a sailor (captain my own sailboat) the term you used that your customer made a 360 degrees turn... that is factually not correct... (because 360 degrees means full circle.. as in arriving at the same spot where he was before), it is my humble opinion that what you actually mean is a 180degrees turn... that would mean indeed a movement in the oposite direction. Again, thanks again, and i will keep following your publications. Best rgds Pieter Kommerij

Maria Ortiz

Director of Global Trade Compliance at Donaldson

6 年

Could not be more true! I have had that exact philosophy for many years and it WORKS! I hope many read this post and apply it.

Giovanni Cancino

Leader Customer Delivery Security Services

6 年

nice reading!, I enjoyed a lot and made my notes

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