60by60

I turned 59 today and I'm beyond my normal birthday excitement. Let me tell you why...

Today marks the beginning of a 365-day journey to make the most of my 60th year on this planet, in this body and with this heart and this mind. It’s a journey I’m calling 60by60.?

60by60 could be seen as a very simple initiative. Just a list of 60 things I want to do before I turn 60.?

But it’s much more than that to me… 60by60 is a brightly shining beacon, which will set my course for the next 10 years of my life. I feel blessed and incredibly excited.

Feeling immense gratitude

When I turned 50, I was in a very dark place, with both my personal and professional life imploding and exploding at the same time. There was no desire for me to celebrate my life, only a desire to end it. An overwhelming feeling of hopelessness.

Fortunately, one day, I was shown a light in all this darkness. It was a beacon of hope. Not only that, but I was given a gift from an unexpected source, which was to forever change the course of my life. And so began my journey towards this light. I had no idea where I was going, but I had two mantras to guide me: “Have faith” and “Be open”. Two mantras which I continue to abide by to this day.

I am deeply grateful for this gift of light, which after much reflection, I now understand was the torch leading me back to my spiritual self. Something I had lost way back in my childhood. I am also immensely grateful to all the people who have guided me on this journey, both wittingly and unwittingly, over the last 10 years.

I am also deeply grateful to everyone who has taught me the hard lessons I have needed to learn during my life so far. Not that I was always grateful, or indeed gracious, whilst learning these lessons, but I now realise just how important those lessons have been on my journey.?

Without these, I would not be who I am today nor where I am today, which is in an amazing space and place, simultaneously at peace with who I am and where I am, and with a burning desire to do so much more during this lifetime.

Gratitude is now a firm part of my daily practice, and it will be an important part of this 60by60 journey. More on that another time, but for now, a big thank you to everyone who has impacted me over the last 59 years.

Time is precious: Carpe Diem and gratitude for the gift of life

So much happened during the first 5 years of my rebirth journey. A story I will one day tell. But today is not that day, so let’s fast forward 5 years.

I was feeling great, experiencing so many wonderful things in my life. One of those things, was an amazing golf trip with two very dear Finnish friends to my home country, the UK, during which we played golf, not only with one of my dearest friends from my school days in England, Simon, but also with my father. I had no idea at the time, but certain things were to happen during the two months following that trip, which meant that that trip was the last time I played golf with my father and that it would be four years before I would be able to play golf, even 9 holes with a buggy, with Simon again.?

This is another story I will tell one day, but for now let me just state that these events drove home to me an understanding of just how precious life is. How it can be there one day and gone tomorrow. Something I was certainly not appreciating when I was planning on taking my own life those 5 years early.

I made the decision that summer, to seize the moment whenever I could, and the line “never take a single breath from granted” from Josh Groban’s Granted song became added to my list of mantras.

I also made the decision that summer to start counting down my years, imagining that I had turned 30 when I was 50, so now had 25 years remaining to ensure that I had done everything I wanted to experience by the time I was 80. Not that I had any intention of dying then, but to ensure that everything I did and experienced after 80 was a bonus.

Speeding things up

The world feels like it’s spinning faster. That time is moving more quickly. From the conversations I’ve had on this topic, I am certainly not the only one to sense this. This increase in speed, or rather this heightened sensation of a lack of time, has felt especially intense post the covid-19 pandemic, and I believe it is a rather direct result of the increased influence of technology on our lives. Something which is proving to be simultaneously a great gift and a great challenge.

This perception I have of time moving faster, has prompted me to move my “experience it all” deadline forward from 80 to 70 years old. Let me reiterate that I don’t intend to stop living then, but rather I intend to have done everything I desire to do and experience in this lifetime by that age. To have no regrets when I turn 70, no wishing that I had only done x, y or z earlier.

Standing still

The list of things I desire to do and experience is long, very long. So, 11 years feels like a short amount of time to me. Now is the time to press on the gas. Why haven’t I done so already I hear you ask?

A good question!?

It’s been a curious last six months in many ways.?

It has been six months of great joy and deep sorrow, disappointment and overwhelm.?

The main cause for joy was the successful completion of the first Year of Joy and seeing, both quantitatively and qualitatively, the positive impact of the initiative is having on people’s lives. The main cause of sorrow was the ending of a very special and very deep loving relationship.

It has been six months of feeling overwhelmed. Whilst back in late 2022, we were able to inspire companies and individuals to give generously to support the birth of both the Year of Joy and EQJOY, we were unable to inspire them to support the growth of these two initiatives to the same extent this year. I was feeling very disappointed in myself and overwhelmed.?

There was so much I wanted to do to build on the initial success of the Year of Joy and empower even more people to harvest more joy in their lives. There was so much I wanted to do to build on the initial success of EQJOY to bring the power of emotional intelligence to even more children. But with very limited resources at our disposal, I felt overwhelmed and deflated. At times I even felt like giving up. At others, I felt a desire to lighten my load, to give up on some of my dreams and focus more. But, which to focus on in that case, was a question I had no answer to.

I felt myself in a fog. I needed clarity, so went into stillness and I doubled down on meditating and I sought counsel from my spiritual guides. I asked: Should I give up? I asked: Shall I lighten my load and give up on one or more of my dreams??

The answer I got, again and again, to the first question was a resounding NO! Both joy and emotional intelligence are much needed in today’s world and what we are providing through the Year of Joy and EQJOY is of great value to meeting these needs, so no, don’t give up!

The answer I got to the second question was also a NO, but it was not as resounding as the NO to the first question. The answer was in fact a couched YES. Yes, I will need to lighten my load, but no, now is not the time. I was told, again and again, that the clarity on what to shed, when and how will only come through movement, through taking action. I was told to move forward on all fronts and trust that the answers will come as the journey progresses. Not make assumptions in advance. As before, help and solutions may indeed come from unexpected sources. Things I currently have no knowledge of.

Refining my purpose

One great outcome from this reflective period has been further clarity on my life purpose, which broadly speaking falls into three buckets:

1. To honor my soul’s desires
2. To evolve spiritually
3. To create and be of service to others

I was very grateful for this increased clarity on my life purpose, but I still had no idea how to move forward with things in practice. And then I went on holiday to Italy with my daughter…

60by60 is born

Before leaving on our vacation, I had decided not to actively concern my mind with my lack of plans whilst on holiday, and instead focus on enjoying my time with my daughter, which involved lots of swimming, pizza and ice cream, as well as a little exploring and some shopping, whilst being open and having faith things would all work out all in good time.?

It was on an exploration / shopping trip to Perugia, when I was least expecting it, that I got the clarity I needed. My daughter wanted us to pop into the Flying Tiger shop and whilst we were looking around, she stumbled across a self-care journal she found interesting. Next to it a purple journal caught my eye. On the front it simply said 100 things. I picked it up and flicked through the pages and right there, right then, I had the answer. I turned to my daughter full of excitement and said: “I’ve got it! 60 things I want to do before I turn 60. Brilliant!”. The poor thing, she had no idea what I was on about, but being used to me, smiled and said: “Go for it Dad!”

So, my 60by60 initiative was thus born. Over the next few days, I put together my list of 60 things and voila, I was ready!

You can find my 60by60 list here . It may well change as the year progresses but for now I have 60 concrete things to work over the next 12 months.

Earlier this year I had set the intention to make the most of the year leading up to my 60th birthday. And now I have a list of 60 things empowering me to do just that. I’m very excited! I have the most energy flowing through me that I have ever felt.

Asking for your help and offering you my service

It’s going to be a fantastic journey, no matter the final outcome after 365 days. I am determined to enjoy the experience to the full, and celebrate not only the triumphs, but also find the gift in the challenges and disappointments I will no doubt face along the way.

Doing these 60 things in one year will be a significant undertaking and one I certainly cannot do alone. One of the things I will do next year is to better leverage my network. So, as part of that task, I will be reaching out to the people I know to ask for assistance, support and/or collaboration. I have no idea who will say “yes” to what as I extend this invitation for help to achieve my dreams. I have faith that some will answer the call and am open to receiving.?

And as part of my goal to be of service and give back, I will be offering a number of free workshops and webinars.

Thank you for reading this and I hope you feel intrigued and inspired by this initiative.

Let the 60by60 journey begin!?