6 Strategies for Managing Emotions During Difficult Conversations at Work

At some point in our careers, we’ll all face a difficult conversation. Whether it’s providing feedback to a colleague, addressing a sensitive issue with a team member, or navigating conflict with a boss, these conversations can stir up strong emotions. The challenge isn’t just having the conversation—it’s managing our emotions so we don’t say something we’ll regret.

Effectively managing emotions is key to maintaining productive, respectful relationships and fostering a healthy work environment. When we regulate our emotions, difficult conversations can actually lead to stronger trust, better collaboration, and meaningful problem-solving.

Why Managing Emotions Matters

Emotions significantly impact how we communicate. If we’re feeling defensive, upset, or overwhelmed, our ability to listen and respond thoughtfully is compromised. This can lead to misunderstandings, escalate conflicts, and damage relationships. However, when we manage our emotions well, we create space for constructive dialogue and resolution.

As Marshall Rosenberg, the creator of Nonviolent Communication, wisely said, “The most powerful thing we can offer one another is the willingness to listen, to truly listen to the other person’s feelings and needs.” By regulating our emotions, we not only hear the words being spoken but also understand the emotions behind them, leading to more meaningful conversations.

At Inclusivv, we focus on helping individuals develop emotional intelligence through our Managing Emotions with Empathy training. Below are three key strategies we teach to help professionals navigate tough conversations with emotional awareness and empathy.

1. Self-Awareness: Recognize Your Own Emotions

Before stepping into a difficult conversation, take a moment to check in with yourself. Are you feeling frustrated, anxious, or defensive? Identifying your emotions is the first step in managing them.

Inclusivv Tip: Before your next tough conversation, pause for self-reflection. Write down what you’re feeling and why. Recognizing emotional triggers can help you prepare for how they might influence the conversation.

For example, if you need to give feedback to a colleague but past disagreements have left you frustrated, acknowledging this feeling can help you manage it. You might remind yourself: “I’m feeling frustrated, but I’ll focus on the issue, not the past.” This simple shift in awareness allows you to respond more thoughtfully.

2. Pause Before Responding

One of the most effective ways to manage emotions is to pause before responding. When emotions run high, it’s easy to react impulsively. But taking a deep breath and allowing yourself a moment to process can make all the difference.

Brené Brown often talks about the power of pausing, noting that “When we’re able to pause, take a breath, and sit with the discomfort, we have the ability to act in a more thoughtful, less reactive way.”

Pausing gives you space to think before you speak. Instead of reacting defensively, you can collect your thoughts and respond with clarity.

For example, if a colleague’s comment irritates you in a meeting, instead of firing back immediately, take a breath and reset. A measured response like, “I see your point, but here’s another perspective,” can keep the conversation constructive.

3. Empathy: Understand the Other Person’s Perspective

Empathy is about stepping into someone else’s shoes and recognizing their emotions and needs. In difficult conversations, empathy helps de-escalate tension and fosters mutual understanding.

Marshall Rosenberg emphasized, “When we listen to the needs of others and express our own needs clearly, we can find solutions that work for everyone.”

Inclusivv Tip: Before responding, ask yourself: What might they be feeling right now? What do they need from me? This practice helps shift the focus from reaction to understanding.

For instance, if a colleague is frustrated about a missed deadline, instead of immediately defending yourself, acknowledge their feelings first: “I understand that this delay is frustrating, and I see how it impacts the team. Let’s figure out how to get back on track.” By showing you understand their perspective, you create space for a more productive conversation.

Want to Learn the Rest?

These three strategies are just the beginning. To explore all six strategies and gain deeper insights into managing emotions in difficult workplace conversations, read the full article on our blog: Six Strategies for Managing Emotions During Difficult Conversations at Work.

Plus, we’re offering a free workbook filled with practical exercises and tools to help you develop emotional intelligence in tough conversations.

Download it here: Managing Emotions During Difficult Conversations at Work Workbook.

By building emotional intelligence, we can create workplaces where tough conversations lead to growth, trust, and stronger relationships. Let’s start the conversation!