55 lessons learned from 100 hours of coaching!

This week I hit an important milestone: 100 hours of coaching.?

What has surprised me the most is how much I learn from my clients everyday, and as oversharing is caring. Here are 55 things I’ve learned from 100 hours of coaching!?

1. No two people with ADHD are the same
2. No ones ADHD is the same on any given day
3. Sleep is super hard with ADHD and makes a huge difference
4. Low levels of regular exercise make people way more positive
5. Self-awareness is the biggest challenge with ADHD
6. Overthinking is the second
7. Memory issues affect confidence - when you can’t remember when things have gone well or how you’ve done things
8. People with ADHD will gas light themselves
9. The negativity bias is real - people are their own worst self-critics
10. Self-compassion is more important than organisational systems
11. The best system is one you use already
12. Simplifying systems drives action
13. Coaching other people can bring up your own triggers
14. The answer to is this an ADHD thing? Is normally yes.
15. Progress isn’t linear?
16. Rest with ADHD is hard
17. RSD affects SO MANY THINGS: business decisions, relationships, work etc.
18. Sometimes it’s not RSD, sometimes people are jerks
19. My clients give me more inspiration than I knew possible
20. Habits are important, but the no 1 habit is self-compassion
21. Making assumptions people will react in a certain way, won’t control how people will react
22. Limiting beliefs make a huge difference e.g: everything is out of my control, I have never done X so I can't do Y
23. You can learn so much from the things which have gone well
24. Perceived self-awareness is different from actual self-awareness
25. Clients say the funniest things
26. Mindset changes can make the biggest difference
27. Work trauma - hits deep and leaves scars
28. Planning for the worst case scenario helps with stress
29. Giving yourself permission to do the thing (i.e taking a day off, asking for support, setting boundaries) is often the barrier of doing the thing
30. Accountability is incredibly effective
31. Ruminating and processing are very different things
32. A lot of people with ADHD are verbal processors
33. Even being able to pause and think about what effect your thoughts are having on you - makes a difference
34. Routines are really hard with ADHD but can make a huge difference
35. Things are explained better in your words
36. Writing things down and putting them in visual places helps with reminders
37. Sometimes things aren’t controllable - but what you can control is your self-compassion
38. Procrastination can be linked to RSD, perfectionism, physical environment, energy levels and more
39. People with ADHD often have higher standards for themselves in order to compensate for inner shame about being discovered
40. Work-life balance is harder with ADHD - people with ADHD work really hard
41. 9/10 you’ll be thinking about a situation WAY more than another person
42. Giving people space and time to figure things out themselves is way cooler (and more effective) than advice
43. The hardest thing about being a coach is NOT giving advice
44. 1hr coaching session = 5 mins?
45. Coaching is really creative - I often don’t know where a coaching conversation will lead
46. Motivation is accessible if you can find emotional interest
47. Laughing at situations is often necessary
48. Humour is an underrated ADHD strength
49. Avoiding the thing often takes way longer than the thing
50. ADHD paralysis is real and is the hardest thing to explain to other people
51. People do get free coaching through Access to Work - but the whole system is inconsistent and NOT ADHD friendly
52. There are some amazing bosses who support people with ADHD out there AND there are some TERRIBLE bosses who make people’s lives harder with ADHD
53. People with ADHD need multiple support systems: at work, at home and sometimes professional support too
54. Coaching sessions sometimes have a weird magic where people will just KNOW the solution to their problems as if by magic.?
55. ADHD coaching isn’t the easiest job I’ve had. Coaching people on real problems can be hard, especially when most coaches are empaths who want to help people. BUT I am surprised daily at how resilient, resourceful and amazing my clients are! Best job ever. ?

I was hoping to get to 100 points but I’ve run out of creative spoons now.

Happy Halloween!

Charlotte

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