50+ After Divorce--Fifth Step on Road To Recovery

Last week, I wrote about the fourth phase on the Road Through Recovery after divorce. The first four are Rejection, Resentment, Renegotiation, and Remorse. You can read about them at https://www.livingabovetheordinary.com

The fifth and final phase is REALITY. During this stage you acknowledge and accept the reality of the situation. You may still feel pain and loss but you can live with it now. You may still visit the other phases but the episodes are less in frequency and intensity. No longer do those feelings totally consume you so that there is no space for moving forward. In this phase, you are ready to extend your arms out and embrace the readiness to move on. Regret and remorse may still be lingering but you can now see the light at the end of the tunnel with hopeful eyes.

Barbara was a widow for five years and married Troy who had never been married. They were married for 12 years before Troy filed for divorce. She was not surprised as the marriage started to fall apart a few years after being wed. Troy was not able to adjust to married life after being on his own for all those years. He decided that since he had many good years left, he wanted to either spend them with someone else or enjoy the freedom of being single as he had for so many years before marrying Barbara.

Although Barbara visited a few of the earlier phases, she was in the REALITY phase. As I said in an earlier post, some may not go through all the phases and Barbara was one of those. Being financially secure, she also had an edge up on many other women who needed to make a lifestyle change after divorce. The burden of finances was obviously not an issue for her. Here are some of the factors she was working on before moving to the next part of the process:

• Willing to take her share of the responsibility for the breakdown of the marriage and forgive herself.
• Let go of past resentments; because in doing so, she is making room for the new life she is about to create.
• There is the fear factor but ready to reconnect with herself and rediscover her strengths, talents, and passion.

As a result of this major change in her life, many things have changed. Life is not what it was but she is ready to make the transition out of staying “stuck“ in the past. She is looking forward to an awesome future of her own design.

If you are divorced and ready to embrace a new beginning creating a new life on your own terms, contact me [email protected]. I offer a complimentary strategy session. There are many of you out there and THE TIME IS NOW.