5 Ways To Tell If You Are Ready To Date Again

Craving intimacy, connection and love with a partner is something that any person with a beating heart (and empathy) desires.

There's so much out there on how to date and how to be more attractive but where's the real information out there that talks about "when are you ready to date".

Have you ever been on the receiving end of ghosting or where someone you date starts off being warm, fun and exciting to suddenly cold, distant and rude.

Or have you ever been on a date where there's expectations of full blown commitment after the first date? The constant messages, calls and the emotional whiplash of keeping them happy.

Well, welcome to the two extremes of people who aren't ready to date yet. Allow me to walk you through a few things that you should consider way before putting yourself out there!!

1. You Feel At Peace Within Your Own Company

This is one of my biggest indicators that I use with my clients to know if they are ready for a relationship or not and if they are at risk of falling into a co-dependant relationship.

Those who have people pleasing tendencies and/or have a high level of empathy often focus on other people's needs rather than their own and what most people don't realise is this is a form of escapism.

If you are afraid of facing your own emotions or you have the tendency to put your needs last then please be warned that this can have a negative effect on your relationships and it's not just a case of "changing your behaviour".

Sometimes people believe that it's just a case of changing the way you are doing things, the truth is that this is healing self worth, identity issues and sometimes healing trauma. Without that level of healing patterns will continue again and again in future relationships.

In our Love With Intelligence Academy we share with our clients how to get over this FAST without the need of years and years of therapy.

2. You Are Living A Life That You Feel Happy With

When you are living a life that you feel completely happy with, you become more picky about who you are going to share your life with.

Think about it, if you've taken the time to create a life that feels good and someone enters your life who isn't aligned or they are someone who doesn't agree or like the way you are living then chances are you are going to be happier to let them go.

When you have a foundation of feeling good and feeling happy, anyone who doesn't match up to that or who doesn't amplify or celebrate that in your life isn't going to be right for you.

Most people have a lazy approach believing their happiness lies within creating a life with someone else... but would you want to create a life with someone who hates their job, has no friends, feel bad about everyone and everything? Or would you rather share your your life with someone who has love and passion for life, who loves their job, has a great social life and takes any opportunity to make life better for themselves?

There's a science to creating a fantastic life! There's also a science to maintain that life without forcing it with discipline and gritting your teeth to get there!! (We cover that in The Love With Intelligence Academy too!)

3. You Are Happy With Who You Are

We often forget that it's all part of the human experience that you make mistakes in life. Problem is that you are more compassionate when someone you love makes a mistake but you are so much harder on yourself when you make a mistake!

Why am I talking about this? It's because most people are unhappy with past events and often most people have a hard time accepting where they are in life now. This has a huge impact on how happy you are with who you are.

Think about the story you tell yourself about you. Some people can go through a victim narrative when it comes to a break up - They left me because I'm not good enough.

Verses a more empowering story like - It was sad the relationship ended and I'm glad that I now have the opportunity to meet someone who is right for me and can love me for who I am.

Being happy with who you are also affects things like trust and confidence which have been psychologically proven to have an impact on attractiveness and dating. PLUS this also has a HUGE impact on the types of partner you attract!!!

Oh and guess what....we cover that in The Love With Intelligence Academy too.

4. You Are Clear On What You Want For The Future

Have you ever found yourself coming out of a relationship realising that you had ended up over compromising?

Maybe there were decisions you made in that relationship to be more aligned with your ex partner and now you are secretly thrilled that you don't have to follow through with that decision now you are not in that relationship.

This is why it's important to know what you do want for the future. Life is too short to go without!!

The clearer you are on what you want makes things easier to go ahead and get it. So what do you want for your life, what do you want for yourself and what do you want in a partner?

Most people don't know how to meet a compatible partner for them and this is why we have developed a framework that helps you to understand who is right for you.

When you understand this, you know who you can have a long lasting relationship with, how to go and meet them and you'll enjoy feeling confident in your relationship because you have that clarity of knowing that they are right for you.

Oh.... you've guess it - that's in here too - The Love With Intelligence Academy

5. You Are Clear On What You Don't Want Too

Always be clear on your deal breakers. This is where most people fail!

You end up meeting someone who you really like, a few weeks in you start to realise that they are into drugs and you are totally against drugs of any kind.

Instead of ending the relationship, you are secretly curious and wonder whether you can test yourself to see if this is something you can get over or if it's something you can change about them. After all they are a great person and they are amazing in bed..... maybe this could be over looked.

Fast forward 7 years..... when a friend asked why you recently broke up "they had a drug problem".

You always find that the thing that causes the relationship to end is the thing that was OBVIOUS in the beginning!

Be clear on your deal breakers, be honest with yourself and do what's right for you!

If you are single and you are wanting to meet someone right for you (whether you feel ready to date or not) then would it be crazy to change your old approach to meeting a potential partner?

The Love With Intelligence Academy is now open, within six months you will learn how to live your best life, date the right one and build a relationship that lasts (using cutting edge behavioural psychology)