5 things to get clear on right now

“If you don’t know where you are headed, it doesn’t really matter what which path you take”.

Imagine being on a crowded subway train in New York City, heading out of the city to Brooklyn, Harlem, Queens or any one of the 5 boroughs. You are there with literally hundreds of other people, each as unique as you, all going somewhere.

Every single one of you has a life, just as precious and important (or insignificant) as each other, here on this earth for a tiny fraction of the infinite timeline of the Universe.

You look around, most people are checked out, some asleep, some reading a book, some staring out the window but most scrolling on their phones, thumb swiping up, and up, and up as they get caught up on the uselessness of social media.

Literally hours spent a day doing nothing, then more time binge watching on Netflix to detach from the hard day at work before doing it all over again the next day.  

That guy is a plumber, this guy is a stock market analyst, she is a grocery store clerk, he is an accountant, she is a lawyer.

How did all these people on this train end up where they are right now?

Was it all intentional or did the course of life just randomly land them into the role of ‘what they do’, who most people also consider ‘who they are’. And on that note, who am I and how the f*ck did I end up where I am?

Are any of them happy? Am I happy?

The reality is wherever anyone is RIGHT NOW is a result of actions or lack of actions in the past. And everything you are doing RIGHT NOW will create a reality of the sameness that you have always experienced; unless you start doing something that you have never done before.

Living life on autopilot, completely checked out, left to the randomness of the Universe and getting by day to day is something I cannot image nor accept.

5 things to get clear on:

How do you define success?

This is one of the biggest traps that people get into, thinking that success is a ‘milestone’ like a certain amount of money in your bank account, how much you want to make in a year, the job or career title.

The problem with that is once you get there, you are fulfilled temporarily, then it wears off and fades away, and you get back on the treadmill again. This is why so many millionaires and billionaires are depressed and even commit suicide, because it is never enough.

For me success is:

1) waking up in the morning with air in my lungs, able to live life for this day and appreciating how precious it is.

2) having incredible relationships

3) having love in my life

4) embracing the journey and not the trophies at the end

5) more money than I need

Success to me is a ‘feeling’ just like happiness or gratitude, not a milestone or a box that can be checked off. It is never ending.

Where is that you want to go?

Do you have a short, mid and long-term goal mapped out? I like to have a goal for the next 3-6 months, a goal for the next 1-2 years and a long-term goal of 5-10 years.

I write these down at least once per week and re-affirm them in my head.

I keep 3x5 cards around and most days I will write all 3 goals down, short, mid and long-term on one side. Then on the other write 3 action steps (big or small) that I can take towards each of them. If I’ve crossed of all 3, I’ve made momentum for the day towards the future I am creating.

What will your legacy be?

What is it that you want to leave behind as your mark on the tiny blip in time that you are here? How will you be remembered? Will you be remembered? Have you ever thought about what your obituary will say?

What is it that makes you happy?

This sounds like a crazy question but do most people even know what really makes them happy? And if they do know, are they actually doing it?

Make a big list of everything that brings you joy and makes you happy. Then make a list of everything that you ‘do’ every day. Are both lists even close to being the same?

Take for example giving and helping other people. This is something that ALWAYS feels so good, so why don’t we do this more? Why do we resist volunteering or donating money?

If you are saying “I’ll be happy when” then you are on the treadmill.

What are your CORE VALUES?

Last week Hallie Avolio and I hosted a Jam Session (Group Zoom Call) where we did an exercise to find our core values, here is a link to a list of personal or professional core values to define what is important to you. Select 5-10 on this list and start to narrow down what is most important to you and find out if you are in alignment with these:

https://jamesclear.com/core-values

By getting clear on what it is that you want, you will truly be living and you'll find an unlimited source of energy to keep you thriving in life.

I am getting on a train and I know exactly where I am going. It's leaving no matter what, but it would be better with you on it.