5 steps to help an overthinker get unstuck and move forward

Whilst it’s completely natural to want to consider your options before making an important decision, an overthinker will spend an excessive amount of time analysing all eventualities before even feeling close to making their final decision. It becomes an emotional rollercoaster of fears and concerns over the endless ‘what if’ scenarios and they stay stuck in cyclical thought patterns.

But there is a way to combat this habitual thinking and strategies to move you forward.

Here are five?steps you can take to help you to move forward:

1) Recognise when you’re stuck

Notice when you are re-playing something that has already happened – you are essentially rehashing it and going over and over it, questioning what you said and did and what you could and should have done differently. Equally, you are overthinking the future – what might and might not happen and the consequences and outcomes of both, or more scenarios. Recognise that these thought patterns are getting you nowhere. You’re headed off into a cul-de-sac and so you need to re-programme the SatNav with a more helpful route.

2) Be solution-orientated

When you have recognised your thoughts are not serving you well, reframe them to be more problem-solving in nature. Rather than to catastrophise, ask yourself a self-coaching question which can shift your focus:

"That’s interesting I feel like this, how could I reframe it, so it serves me better?"

"What's the healthiest thing I can do right now, to calm my thoughts?"

"Could any of these thoughts I'm currently experiencing, be untrue?"

?3) Question your thoughts

When you recognise the unhelpful thoughts, say to yourself: ‘That’s interesting, why do you think you’re thinking like that?’ It helps to reframe what it is you’re so concerned about. Ask yourself if there is a need to analyse and over-analyse the issue or situation in such depth? It’s not about ignoring what you’re concerned about, so dedicate some time to the thought then ask yourself: ‘How long do I want to worry about this? An hour? A day? Two days? A week? Will I remember the consequences of this decision in a month? Or a year? Five years?’

4) Focus on what you can control

Sometimes you might concern yourself with something that you can have no effect over whatsoever – someone else’s relationship, the state of the education system, or a natural disaster. The one thing you can control is the type of thoughts you are choosing to have. If you can have no effect on something, it’s knowing that and choosing to switch your thoughts to an area of your life where you can make a difference. Refocus your energy.

5) Repeat powerful affirmations

Affirmations create new neural pathways which will enable effective thinking habits. Change your path and create the grooves in your brain that will divert from old thought patterns. Repeat affirmations at least twice daily until your subconscious brain catches up:

"I trust my ability to make good choices."

"I welcome new experiences with an open heart and an open mind."

"I love and approve of myself."

You are not born an overthinker. It is learnt or something you've developed over time, perhaps as a result of a certain event or circumstances. However, if this is an unhelpful habit you've created, you can create a more helpful habit that helps you to move forward with your thinking.

It's important to be consciously aware of the nature of your thoughts - the first step to breaking these habitual thought patterns. By catching yourself doing it, you can reframe those thoughts.

Listen to our podcast on overthinking.