A 5-Step Checklist for Your Next Networking Event

The following is adapted from An Introvert’s Guide to World Domination.

For many introverts like myself, deciding to attend an event is a BIG deal. There are several reasons why we might decide to make the leap: to connect with people, make new friends, reconnect with old friends, or establish relationships. We’re acknowledging the possibility that good things can happen when you put an event on your calendar and commit to going.

But then comes the inevitable dread: I’m all-in on attending this event… now what? As someone who’s been to more events than I can remember, I know what happens before you walk through the door is just as important as what happens when you’re there. This is especially true with networking events. If you’re going to a holiday party for your work, you can afford no plan.

But to make a networking event worth your time, you need to show up prepared. So, with that in mind, here’s a five-step checklist that will help you prepare to network like a champ.  

#1: Set Proper Expectations

So, what should you expect when you go in? You’re not going to just go in there and take over the world. A really good expectation is to try to walk out with one solid connection. One person you would like to see again, about whom you would say, “This seems like someone I would like to be friends with, follow up with, get to know, and spend time with.” 

Your goal is to try to find ONE.

You might find more than that, or you might not, but you are trying to make at least one solid connection you want to follow up with that you find fascinating or interesting. 

You wouldn’t think it should be that hard, right? Sometimes things just don’t click, but sometimes they do, and you will get more than one—you’ll get several! But you need to manage your expectations; you’re going for one. If it doesn’t happen, no big deal; that’s normal too. You’re still good, you’re learning. And if you get more, awesome!

So, set expectations at one solid connection. Cool, what’s next?

#2: Dress to Impress

You want to figure out what the standard is for the event you’re attending. You’re NOT trying to blend in. I repeat…DON’T BLEND IN! You’re trying to stand out, but you don’t want to stand out too much. You’re not there to be a peacock with your feathers all on display.

You want to find out what the standard attire is and go just a little bit higher, or dress the standard and add an accessory that will be memorable.

Maybe you have a belt or something that is unusual. Maybe, if you’re a man, you have a pocket square that’s a little different. Or, men or women can wear shoes that are a little brighter or have something different about them. If you’re going standard like everybody else, you need one accessory that is unique; or dress a bit better than the standard AND add an accessory.

Think about people you have met in the past who had something that stood out about them with their clothing. I remember at an event I met a guy who wore a tucked-in Hawaiian shirt and had his hair parted down the middle. I was thinking, “What’s up with this guy?”

But if I live to be 1,000 years old, I’ll still remember him. I’m not saying you should go to that extreme; I’m just saying I’m sure everyone at that event remembers that guy. 

#3: Alone or Plus-One? 

When attending events, is it better to show up alone or with a partner? Usually I prefer to go alone because you can do certain things when you’re alone that you can’t do if you’re with a partner, and I feel I usually end up meeting a lot more people if I’m alone.

However, there are also certain things you can accomplish with a partner you can’t do if you’re alone. For example, there’s a technique I like called the “Magic of Three.” It’s where you start a group of three, and then if you see someone else you want to talk with, you won’t feel bad leaving that group to speak with them. With a plus-one, this technique is easier to pull off.

So, although I prefer to fly solo, a plus-one is cool if it makes you more comfortable.

#4: Show Up Early

You don’t want to be one of these people who shows up “fashionably late” thinking that’s the best way to make an appearance. You also don’t want to show up on time.

You want to show up early. Why? So you can get the lay of the land. You can see what’s going on, see how it’s set up, and then you can position yourself for the best advantage.

If you show up late, or on time, everyone is already settled or getting settled in, people are in their groups, and you have to come in and try to do your thing. You’ll still be able to do it, but it’s way better if you’re one of the early people so you can decide, “Where do I want to set up?”

Then as people arrive, you’re already established. It’ll be much easier for you to engage from an established position versus just popping in late and trying to navigate your way through it.

If you are an extrovert, maybe you show up late because you’re cool like that. But for introverts, I’m telling you this way is better. Show up early and you’ll be more comfortable the whole time.

#5: What About Your Phone?

You showed up early. You’re out in the parking lot. Take this time to get centered. Get your mind right; remember why you’re here. You’re trying to make one connection. Take a few deep breaths and put your phone on silent. You’re not going to mess with your phone.

I’ll say it again: Don’t mess with your phone.

If you’re worried you won’t be able to resist the habit during a lull in the action, you can leave it in the car. Don’t bring it out unless someone is giving you their phone number or something like that, and only then can you bring it out and put the phone number in. But don’t be messing with your phone. It is not going to help you. It’s going to work against you in so many ways. 

Now You’re Ready to Network

With these five steps, you’ll be prepared to dominate your next networking event—which is no small feat for an introvert! There’s also something cool that happens whenever your scheduled event is over: you actually start looking forward to the next one. I know, it’s crazy, right?

That’s because you’ve slayed the dragon and now you have confidence. What once seemed scary—meeting new people and making small talk—is now a walk in the park.

You’ll be on your way to building a thriving network, one event at a time!

For more advice on preparing for your next networking event, you can find An Introvert’s Guide to World Domination on Amazon.

Nick Shelton, “the connected introvert,” has been fine-tuning the craft of effective, high-level social strategy and networking for twenty years. Beginning with his time in the United States Air Force, Nick learned skills that were indispensable to his journey. Coupled with extensive research and fifteen years of experience in the oil and gas industry, Nick finally “cracked the code” and developed tools that gave him the confidence to flourish in social situations. Nick has successfully built a strong, international network of friends, colleagues, and associates and continues to teach introverts how to navigate social events with ease. You can learn more about Nick—and his methods—at www.connectedintrovert.com.