5 reasons why most New Year's resolutions don't stick, according to a psychotherapist

Every year as the New Year approached many people make New Year's Resolutions but only very few of them actually keep them. Often promises relate to getting in shape and living a healthier life, finish long ago postponed projects/degrees, and the list goes on.

I have come across an article on the 5 reasons why most New Year's resolutions fail (https://www.businessinsider.com/reasons-why-most-new-years-resolutions-dont-stick) and thought to share it as I know many of you are hard at work making your list of New Year's Resolutions for 2020.

According to the article 'a study conducted by researchers at the University of Scranton found that 23% of people quit their resolution after just one week. And only 19% of individuals are actually able to stick to their goals long term (two years, in the case of the study)'. Which group do you belong to? The one who sticks it out or the one who abandons the promise within the first week?

Let's review the 5 reasons and let's loom in the mirror and see how we fare on each of these reasons. I cannot recall ever having made New Year's Resolutions as I never believed that a specific date would trigger me to change, let's see why for me it is not a date that should trigger change but the need for change should come from within:

1. NOT READY TO CHANGE - In order for me to stick to a commitment I have to believe that a change is needed and that the change is for the better. Knowing that being healthy is a good thing but it requires commitment and discipline if you are not ready to make the commitment to change your ways you will never succeed with your desire to become healthier. You have to be ready for the change physically and mentally otherwise your resolution will only be an unrealized dream!
2. NO SELF-MONITORING - If you cannot measure it you cannot improve it! This is the same methodology we apply at Athletic Republic when we start working with Young Athletes who have made the commitment to change or have the desire to become better at their sports. We measure and test the athletes at the beginning of our program and periodically re-test /measure them to monitor progress. You cannot expect miracles so the measurement period needs to be far enough where realistically you can expect to see results/improvements. You can also share your New Year's Resolution with a few of your close friends/family who can help you monitor progress and encourage you to stay on track! Alternatively, if you don't want to share your goals, you can always track your progress on Apps; unless you are very motivated and committed a small set back can get you easily off track and potentially end up giving up your resolution.
3. LACK OF PLANNING - Without a plan dreams/resolutions are harder to achieve. Think ahead and make plans what has to change (how you include exercise into your busy day, a well planned grocery list, healthy snacks when you are on the go, etc). Think about it as a project that requires a detailed project plan!
4. OVERCONFIDENCE - 'Change is hard. Acknowledge that it's tough to delay gratification and push yourself when you're tired. Saying it's going to be difficult to stay on track doesn't mean you're weak. It means you're being realistic'. When you are overconfident you underestimate detractors to your resolution and you might not be as laser focused as you would need to be otherwise. Stay humble, focused and realistic and your goals will realized!
5. NOT LOOKING AT WHAT HAS TO BE GIVEN UP - This all goes back to planning, when you take the time to think through on what changes you have to make to achieve your goals you will quickly realize that some activities might need to be 'dropped' to make time for those activities that will get you to your objectives. If your New Year's Resolution is to become healthier you will have to make time to go to the gym. Your commitment to your New Year's Resolution will require you to reprioritize some of your activities to find time to fit in new ones. You have to be a realist otherwise you will find yourself saying 'I cannot find time to go to the gym' and there goes your New Year's Resolution.

As I mentioned before, I am not the one who makes resolutions, for me any day is a great day to make a first set towards a personal/professional objective. I am a realist so know that success does not happen over night, I always attempt to set interim goals so that I could celebrate small successes along the way as I keep my eyes on the prize!

Years ago at McKesson our Divisional CEO, @Pam Pure (a mother of three) once said (and I paraphrase) 'Every day I have the opportunity to try to be the best wife, mother, professional daughter, friend, etc. Not every day do I achieve my goals but I know that the following day I will have another opportunity to try ...' - for me Pam's thinking could be applied to New Year's Resolutions; we should not give them up after a couple of bad days, we should stick with our commitment and try the following day to do better