5 powerful steps to take when you fail

Sometimes, no matter what we do, things don't go the way we expect them to. Many things are beyond our control and even if we have done our best, sometimes it just isn't enough. It is normal to feel defeated and down when that happens. Our friends and family want us to feel better immediately, and they tell us things like 'Don't feel bad,' or 'It wasn't meant for you.'

While they say those things to comfort us, many a time it has the opposite effect. It makes us feel worse because it?feels like they do not understand how much it meant to us, and it feels like they aren't allowing us to express what we deeply feel. It's happened to me many times. Over the years, I devised a way to help myself and it has helped me a great deal. Today, I thought I'd share it with you.

?Here are five simple yet powerful things to do when things do not go your way.

1. Mourn: Allow yourself to feel sadness for whatever it is that you have lost. Accept your feelings. Accept the disappointment that comes along with it. It is okay to feel sad. If you are unable to bear the grief, write down your thoughts. The act of writing down untangles feelings which are jumbled, and you will be surprised at how much the simple act of writing down your feeling helps.

2. Reflect on what you can do: Once you've accepted and taken stock of your sadness, set some time aside and reflect upon what you can do. If you are able to take some actions to solve the problem, then put that into motion. Calmly and logically, think about whether this disruption that has happened is truly ruining your life. Are you reacting from a place of overwhelming emotion or from a place of logic? Five years from now, will this catastrophe matter? Think about the past adversities you have faced which seemed insurmountable back then. You've overcome those. You will overcome this too.

3. Focus on things within your control: You cannot control how others behave or act. You can control how you respond to them or to the situation. Focus only on that aspect which is within your control

4. Take baby steps: If the loss that you have faced is devastating,?accept that loss. Once you have accepted it, take small tiny steps?towards your goal every day. Do this consistently.?Before long you would have advanced a great deal towards your goal.

5. Take support/ help: If you are unable to cope, ask for help. Speak up, and seek help. Don't try to carry the whole burden yourself. You will be surprised at how many people are willing yo help you when you ask them.

Many a time we're so overwhelmed when we face difficulties that we forget the above, simple steps.

Hope these tips helped you as much as they've helped me.

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Ps: If you likes these tips, check out my self-help book 'The Magic Mindset' which was voted as the most popular self-help book on amazon India in 2021.