5 Must Have Traits for Success: #4 THINKING RIGHT, BEING POSITIVE (by @PhoenixMarcon)

We shouldn’t apologize to ourselves. A sense of the dignity of life, and the sovereignty of the soul, should keep us strong and positive. We should be too big for that little habit of making excuses. Self-depreciation never won a single battle of life. It has, on the contrary, killed ambition, weakened the will, and incapacitated thousands of men for noble work. Apology is weakness on parade. Avoid it. Observe some man who comes toward you, walking with short, jerky steps, his dress careless, the corners of his mouth turned down, keeping well to one side of the walk. As he passes,he gives you a hasty, frightened glance, which shows you, unmistakably, despair, discouragement, and failure. The man's whole life probably has been negative in its character and outlook. The daily, and perhaps hourly, streams of false suggestions poured into his mind have at last overwhelmed him and his life closes in an eclipse.

Many people who are tormented by fear and timidity does not realize what a flood of negative thoughts daily affects them. They hem themselves in with suggestions of limitation, incapacity, and unworthiness. They constantly think not of how they will succeed, but of how they will surely fail. When Washington Irving was asked to preside at a public dinner for Charles Dickens, upon his visit to America, he hesitated and said he would surely fail. It was pointed out to him that he was really the man to be the toastmaster for that function, and at last was prevailed upon to accept. But to many friends he repeated his fear that they would fail. The night came, and before a brilliant gathering Irving arose to speak. He made an excellent beginning, but suddenly stopped and brought his remarks to a close. As he sat down, he whispered to a friend on his left, "There, I told you I would fail, and I did!"

In developing the habit of positive thinking--of seeing only the best in yourself and others--of regarding yourself as capable of great things—it’s well to bear in mind that our thoughts really make us what we are. What you did yesterday makes you what you are today, and what you do today determines what you will be tomorrow. Suppose you put these practical questions to yourself: Does negative thinking pay? Is it desirable for me to encourage thoughts in my mind that break down, hinder, and incapacitate me for good work? Do I want negative thoughts that inevitably bring discontent, unhappiness, and ultimate failure in their train?

Your answer will be, of course, that you don’t want them. But such thoughts work insidiously, and will find an entrance into your mind if you’re not extremely vigilant. The surest way to keep them out, however, is to fill the mind completely with vital positive thoughts, to think constantly of yourself as a person of unlimited possibilities, growing daily in mental and spiritual power, equipped for great things, a necessary part of God's glorious creation, and moving forward toward a triumphant and immortal destiny.

It’s difficult to construct positive thoughts out of the poor stuff from which dreams are made. People should devote themselves particularly to the practical things of life. Some people learn this lesson all too late, for, as Thoreau says, "Youth gets together the materials for a bridge to the moon, and maturity uses them to build a wood-shed."

The habit of positive thinking, when firmly established, becomes a source of attraction. Good thoughts soon become great thoughts, and the mature mind attempts even the impossible. The power of a single thought at the beginning of a day can NOT be over-estimated. It can change despondency into hope, and fear into courage. It can nerve the arm for great and noble deeds. It can strengthen a weak and timid character into a whole person. It’s possible for it to set in motion an influence that will reach the ends of the world.

The importance of positive thinking is its effect upon doing right for YOUR life. How many disastrous mistakes are made for lack of proper thought? How many of life's failures are due to a careless and unwise selection of a business or profession?

It was Sidney Smith who said: "If we represent the occupations of life by holes in a table, some round, some square, some oblong, and persons by bits of wood of like shapes, we shall generally find that the triangular person has got into the square hole, the oblong into the triangular, while the square person has squeezed himself into the round hole."

But meditation, too, is an essential part of positive thinking. A writer said that there is not much real, honest thinking done in the world, but I’m not inclined to agree with him. Much of the thinking is honest enough, but it is badly organized, and even more badly applied. We must learn to brood more over our thoughts, to dwell long and intently upon ideas that seem dark and obscure, to fashion patiently intricate links of truth into chains of powerful argument.

In his pursuit of positive thinking the student should learn the art of definition. Thoughts fully matured in the mind are seen to be there in so many words. What do our thoughts or words really mean?  The first step is to define them, and next to consider their truth. The habit of "constant and searching reflection," recommended by Gladstone, is what more than anything else produces right thinking.

"I wish to congratulate you, Mr. Webster," said a young admirer, "upon your wonderful impromptu effort to-day." "Impromptu!" exclaimed the great orator, "my young friend, I have been thinking out that speech for over six months!"

"How long does it take to prepare a sermon? " some one asked Dr. John Watson. "If you mean to write the manuscript, then a day may suffice; but if you mean to think a sermon, then it may be ten years!''

It’s good sometimes to think out loud, when you’re alone, in order to bring your thoughts out into concrete form. There is the advantage of definiteness, of getting an impression of the sound of words, and of making them seem real. Thoughts when uttered take on a life, reality, and character they didn’t have before. They can better be considered, analyzed, and assigned to their proper duty or thrown in the garbage. The very act of giving expression to our thoughts illuminates and invests them with new power and significance.

An excellent way to furnish the mind with material for positive thinking is to commit to memory some of the sayings of great men and to ponder them at leisure.

This helps you establish a standard of truth, and at the same time furnishes the mind with many nourishing and useful thoughts. Here are some examples: 

"The confidence which we have in ourselves gives birth to much of that which we have in others.''--La Rochefoucauld.

 "‘Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all.'' --Tennyson.

 "They who has once been very foolish will at no other time be very wise.''--Montaigne.

 "Nothing is said nowadays that has not been said before.''--Terence.

 '' They must necessarily fear many, whom many fear.''--Seneca.

 "Courage in danger is half the battle." --Plautus.

 "The multitude is always in the wrong." --Dillon.

 "Thought once awakened does not again slumber.''--Carlyle.

 '' Second thoughts, they say, are best.'' --Dryden.

 "There is a tide in the affairs of men, which taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; Omitted, all the voyage of their life is bound in shallows and in miseries." --Shakespeare.

 "We should not let others do our thinking for us. Our individuality is too precious to be so sacrificed.” 

Too many persons are like a chief of the South Sea Islands described by Sir John Lubbock. "Wishing to question him, Sir John first bountifully fed him, whereupon they fell into slumber. "When awakened they simply said: "Ideas make me sleepy." There are men who dislike thinking for them- selves; it is too much like work; it makes them drowsy, and, after all, what is the use of it? Such men lack the true spirit of independence and courage. They are not in line; let it be said with pity, for great work, leadership, and noble success.

Positive thinking gives tone and vigor to the physical man, purifies and enlarges his mental world, and leads him into spiritual realization. While our thoughts are building body and character, they are also shaping human destiny.

"What a man thinks in his spirit in the world," declared Swedenborg, "that he does after his departure from the world when he becomes a spirit."

To think that our thoughts comprise "the city of man's soul" should awaken in us a determination not to waste this precious substance in reckless prodigality.

Every person who thinks positively has reason to feel proud of themselves, and they walk with "the magic in their eye." There is no weakness, no timidity, no hesitation, since to them right is might. They have learned to make their thoughts selective; they take the good and reject the bad. They know, too, how to fit each thought into its proper place, make correct inferences, and form well-considered judgments.

This clear and positive thinking is constructive in its character; it builds new power and discloses ever-widening fields of usefulness. Wrong or negative thinking is destructive; it produces nothing but paralysis, fear, hopelessness, and heartrending failure.

Positive thinking means cheerful thinking. It means that a person is an intellectual optimist, who sees nothing but good in himself and in those about him. His thought goes out to clarify and brighten the lives of other men. Let Robert Louis Stevenson inspire discouraged men to similar heroism. Propped up in bed for weeks at a time, and racked by pain, not a weak or negative thought escaped his lips. But his glorious mind framed this: "A happy man or woman is a better thing to find than a five-pound note. He or she is a radiating focus of good will; and their entrance into a room is as though another candle had been lighted. We need not care whether they could prove the forty-seventh proposition; they do a better thing than that, they practically demonstrate the great theorem of the livableness of life."

When a difficult question came to Webster they would say, "Let me sleep on it." He must give his thought time to mature. Deliberateness and patient meditation played a prominent part in the building of his mind.

How would a man exclude negative thought from his life? Certainly not by affirming such sentences as "I have no fear," "I am not weak," "I do not lack ability," "I am not a failure." Remembering that only positive thoughts are constructive, they will avoid even the use of negative symbols as "weak," "fear," "lack," "failure." They will say, rather, "I am self-confident," "I am strong," "I am able," "I am a success." These affirmations will be made both silently and audibly, always with deep conviction and earnestness.

Let the student remember, however, that these affirmations must be confirmed by actual performance. A man might sit in his office chair and continually affirm that he was a success, and nothing but success, until they fell over from heart failure. When you say "I am courageous," you must demonstrate it in your daily life. You may say "I am hopeful, powerful, buoyant, cheerful," but if you then proceed to sit down in a corner by yourself and moan about your fate, you are simply deluding yourself. It is not sufficient that you believe what you affirm; you must be it, live it, and act it.

Every person who aspires to positive thinking should shut the door of his mind against fear thought and negative thought as they would against their most bitter enemies. Negative thought works its way cunningly, by plausible excuse and subterfuge, until it holds a person in its death-like grasp. It subdues, discourages, weakens, intimidates, and at last brands its victim a failure and outcast. To harbor it in one's mind is to entertain an enemy.

Positive thinking means that which constructs, strengthens, and ennobles. It means better manhood, the courage to do and to dare, and the heroism of mighty effort. It knows no limitation, but reaches out daily for new conquests. It is a power unto itself, growing through its own use.

Our habits of thought must be governed by fixed principles. One clear-cut, positive suggestion made in good time may frighten off a thousand petty negative thoughts. The thing we repeat frequently enough in our mind comes to acquire undisputed authority. We should not seek to perform some one great act of courage, but courageously perform all acts, however small, of our every-day life. Pascal says: 

"Positive thoughts come from faith, negative thoughts from doubt; the right fear, joined to hope, because it is born of faith and we hope in the God in whom we believe; the wrong, joined to despair, because we fear the God in whom we have faith; some fear to lose Him, others fear to find Him."

Let us persist in our aim to think positively, and to do right, knowing that "true courage consists in long persevering patience." Let us more earnestly direct our thought toward the lofty and sublime. Above all let us seek the best sources of inspiration, that the great thoughts of other men may become our thoughts, and that we may rise into the fullness of our rich inheritance.