5 minutes with.... Abigail Barnes

I first came across Abigail Barnes who was a presenter at a conference in 2019 organised by Nicky Christmas aka Practically Perfect PA.

Abigail came onto stage, glowing yet commanding with a soft dress blowing ever so gently in the breeze in the room.

I sat there, listening to her wise words, wishing I could be her. Now, despite my flaws, I’m happy being me and there isn’t anybody I’d rather be, but for that moment, I was wishing I was Abigail.

The conference was fantastic and exhausting due to so much content over two days and I left motivated to get back to work and carry on finding ways to promote development opportunities for assistants in Liverpool.

A few months later I spotted a post on LinkedIn written by Abigail and I knew that I would love to have Abigail come to Liverpool and share her wisdom with my peers. I dived straight in and added to her post ‘Fancy a trip to Liverpool?’. Her reply flawed me, she was up for it. Now that is Abigail all over. Abigail has this ‘can do’ attitude, is passionate about helping others and seeing life as an adventure. When you read her story, you will understand why.

Abigail, tell us about that ‘moment’ when life changed for you.

It was Saturday 25 February 2012 and I was in Boston Massachusetts, America for a work business trip.

The symptoms started around 7:30am first with a headache and dizziness, quickly turning into an aversion to light and sickness (at first I thought it might be a migraine). I was staying at a friends parents house so that we could hangout in Boston ahead of a week of work, she’d flown in from New York especially.

Her Mum upon consultation was more cautious and called an Ambulance (which at the time I thought was a tad dramatic, but actually most likely saved my life) because by 8.00am I was paralysed and struggling to breath finding myself hitting deaths door and begging God, the Angels, the Universe for a second chance to live.

At which point the ambulance crew came crashing into the room. And 24 hours after that I was in the hospital being told by a Dr that at 32 years old I’d had a stroke.

What led up to that day?

The lead up to that day was one of long days, early starts and late nights, but that was the norm in the finance sector.

It turns out that at some point in the run up to the trip I’d sustained a knock on my neck (hard to tell when or how) causing a blood clot that could have burst at any time. Effectively I had been a ticking time bomb. Thank goodness there were people around me when it happened and I wasn’t on the plane or alone in a hotel room.

How did you overcome those circumstances and turn life around to what you are doing today?

The doctors say strokes like this are rare and that I was lucky to come away with only the mental health/PTSD side affects of the trauma.

Returning to the UK I was scared, paranoid, angry and depressed for the first month or so. Which is normal after a stroke as the brain recovers from the injury and tries to make sense of what happened.

Thanks to YouTube and personal development I was able to see that what happened to me actually happened for me to change the direction of my life.

I quit my job, wrote a book and started a business.

What is Success by Design Training’s mission and what is the 888 formula?

Success by Design Training is on a mission to help 1 million individuals get better work/life balance by 2025. Working with ambitious professionals and visionary organisation that want to improve their productivity & wellbeing.

The 888 Formula is a cutting-edge, holistic approach to work life balance. A practical framework that helps individuals audit their life and identify areas for development against 3 key metrics based on science and social norms.

"Life for me is about learning to adapt and grow"

One minute you write articles, the next you are travelling the country speaking and training, you are an author, now you record videos and arrange and present virtual conversations bringing together industry experts. How do you adapt so effortlessly?

I am grateful for a second chance at life and want to make the most of every moment. Life for me is about learning to adapt and grow, and never being afraid to fail because because that’s proof I’ve tried and now I have data that I can use the next time around.

I wouldn’t describe adaption for me as effortless, I describe it as a constant daily choice to live outside my comfort zone and try new things.

How do you cope when life is perhaps a struggle?

There will always be challenging days that’s life and the quicker I can get to the acceptance stage when I do have one of those days the better.

The pain comes when I make myself wrong for not feeling ‘100% excited’ about life.

What helps me at these times is a combination of journaling, a walk outside, a gratitude rant (where I list 8 things I am grateful for as quickly as I can), a glass or water (not chocolate or caffeine), lighting a candle, or spraying perfume and playing my ?? Dance Party playlist on Spotify and dancing around to it.

Finally I remind myself that this too shall pass. Life is a miracle and time is a gift.

Who inspires you and why?

I am inspired by everyone that chooses courage over fear, by humans who have overcome adversity and are using it as a solid foundation to build on.

What is next for Abigail and where can we find out more about you?

2020 is the year of the unexpected so who really knows! The plan is a new book and getting the 888 Formula into the lives of 1 million people by 2025.

This year it seems like a lot of those interactions are going to be online and socially distanced.

Website: www.succcessbydesigntraining.com

Linkedin: uk.linkedin.com/in/abigailrbarnes

Instagram: instagram.com/abarnesauthor/

Facebook: facebook.com/abigailbarnesauthor

Twitter: twitter.com/abarnesauthor