The 5 Love Languages of Cats: Where Do You Rank in Their Hearts?

Cats show their affection in a multitude of ways. But unfamiliar with the visual cues they give, you might think cats are unfriendly and aloof. If they are, maybe it's not too late to learn their love language, speak it, and bond or re-bond with your feline friend.

All You Need is Love

To be fair, the Beatles said it first. But truth is truth. Sound made up? Think about why you got a pet in the first place. The need for love drove your decision–unless it was forced upon you.

And not only the love you felt for the pet but its love for you. Quid-Pro-Quo. You gave it love by adopting it into your home and feeding/caring for it. You gave it a name and a place to belong. It wants to return the favor.

The love of a pet is one of the greatest joys a human being experiences or can experience. It's unconditional. And that makes it remarkably rare in this world. Whether you're a dog or cat person, you can learn to speak their language and develop a deeper bond.

What About Love

Don't get me wrong, I love dogs, too. It's just that they're so much easier to win over and read. Dogs show love in easily identifiable ways:

• Wagging Its Tail
• Licking Your Face
• Sleeping On You or Beside You
• Letting You Pet It and Rub Its Belly
• Following Your Commands

But a cat's love is harder to identify unless you're a Neko No Sasayaki: a Cat Whisperer. Fortunately, yours truly is here to help. Let's dig into the five ways your cat tells you it loves you.

1. The Tail Test

Cats use their tails for balance and aerodynamics, but to the trained cat whisperer, their tail is also the first reveal of their feelings about you.

• A tail flat or down shows fear and timidity. If afraid of you, the tail will stay that way until you remove the reason it's worried.
• When their tail takes the form of a question mark, it means just that–it's curious or questioning.
• Unlike Mr. Waggles the dog, a cat's flicking tail shows irritation or anger. You best be ready for the kitty octagon.
• A tail straight up shows it's doing great and is happy you're there. This upward tail displays that it feels safe with you around. It's often the first sign that Miss Kitty likes you.

They will, over time, turn their rear end toward you with their tail up as a sign they trust you with their vulnerable parts exposed. They know you won't harm them.

2. Rub-A-Dub-Dub

Cats are remarkable animals with several ways to mark their territory. One of these is rubbing their bodies on you as they circle your legs.

How they walk by or with you is their way of saying you belong to them and with them in the family. They're glad you're theirs. It also says they accept you as their superior. You've got status!

You may not be happy when you trip over them or step on them and incur their wrath, but aside from the possibility that Miss Kitty is trying to trip you for kicks, cats circle the owners they love and rub themselves on them. Repeatedly.

3. Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep

When your cat trusts you and has bonded with you (and cats bond through play, not petting as a dog does), it may decide to take a siesta in your lap or on your keyb%#^$%$&$&*T*oard as you try to work.

This is usually accompanied by a deep purr that has been shown to have healing properties for the cat and its human. To sleep with your warmth, scent and touch shows absolute trust and affection.

4. A Blink by Any Other Name

Try this: Look into your cat's eyes and blink slowly. Repeat this step without staring too long–that would suggest a challenge—just slow blinks.

What did your kitty do? Did she wink back, turn her face away or stare at you? If she blinked back at you slowly, that's a sign of affection, akin to an "I love you, too."

And who doesn't want to hear that?

Repeat these steps several times and enjoy the love connection.

5. The Kiss

Cats have scent glands on the sides of their cheeks and use them to mark surfaces they find calming, pleasant tactilely, and a part of their kingdom. They also use them to kiss the one they love.

When you receive these face rubs, your cat trusts and loves you.

It may feel odd at first, but learning to speak their love language at the highest level is something many people never experience.

Please don't blow it!

You Had Me at Meow

Reading a cat is different, to be sure, than reading a dog. But cats offer so many levels of emotion akin to humans like you and me. It took me a long time to grasp all of their subtle nuances, but to know I rescued any animal and earned its affection, is the best feeling in the world.

Thank you to Shekel (first dog, deceased), Gandalf, Radagast, Strider (deceased), Samwise (deceased), Pippin, Nessa, Elrond (deceased), Tauriel Meraidoc, Gypsy, Lt. Frank Drebin–Police Squad, Tigress, Matrix, Glitch, and Fievel. Honorable mention to our part-time feral kitty–White Sox, and the tiny kitten exploring the house now and then–Dot.

One day we'll meet again, and that will be the greatest day of my life.