The 5 Essential Steps to Becoming an Empathetic Leader

I recently had the pleasure of speaking with Rob Volpe , an expert on empathy, especially in the workplace. As CEO of Insight360 , a marketing research firm, and author of an award-winning book titled "Tell Me More About That: Solving the Empathy Crisis One Conversation at a Time," Rob has seen firsthand how empathy can unlock innovation, inclusiveness, and results.

Our conversation explored the meaning of empathy, its benefits, and, most importantly, how to cultivate it in your personal and professional life.

Defining Empathy

Many people misunderstand empathy or confuse it with sympathy. Empathy is about perspective taking – seeing someone else’s point of view – and feeling what others feel. There are two types: cognitive empathy involves understanding another’s perspective, while emotional empathy means actually feeling their emotions.

Both are important, though we may be more naturally inclined toward one versus the other. The key is recognizing when to tap into cognitive or emotional empathy, depending on the situation and person.

Why Develop Empathy?

Practicing empathy leads to better relationships, communication, collaboration, and leadership. Data shows that empathy boosts employee engagement, innovation, and inclusivity in the workplace.

For example, one study found that 75% of employees say their company is empathetic, but only 25% feel it’s safe to express empathy. Meanwhile, 90% of Gen Z prefers empathetic employers.

Clearly, empathy matters. But make no mistake – it’s a skill requiring courage, self-awareness, and practice. Even CEOs recognize the need for more empathy, though many struggle to demonstrate it consistently.

The 5 Steps to Empathy

Rob shared his 5-step empathy process for productive conversations:

1. 1. Break Down Judgment—Catch yourself when you are judging other people's choices and try to see things from their point of view. Awareness is key.
2. 2. Ask Good Questions – Open-ended questions without leading allow others to explain their viewpoint.
3. 3. Actively Listen – Focus completely on the other person without distraction. Notice their nonverbal signals.
4. 4. Integrate Understanding – Make room to accept different perspectives. Stay curious.
5. 5. Use Solution Imagination – Apply your empathy to meet others where they are and move forward.

Rob gave a great example of using cognitive empathy rather than judgment at an NRA event. Despite vastly different views on guns, he related to attendees’ core motivation – keeping loved ones safe.

Asking follow-up “how” questions also uncovers deeper meaning. As Rob said, the gift is unwrapping insights layer by layer.

Empathy to Compassion to Action

Understanding others is crucial, but compassion requires us to act on that empathy. Wisdom guides our compassionate responses in business.

Empathy is the starting point on a path leading to compassionate action. As Thupten Jinpa says,

"Empathy means understanding others, while compassion takes action to relieve their suffering."

Creating a Safe Environment

A psychologically safe environment is crucial for empathy, compassion, innovation, and performance to flourish. Psychological safety means team members feel trusted and accepted. When people know they can take risks and be vulnerable without judgment, they will share more openly.

Trust is the foundation. Empathy builds trust because it's the ability to relate to others non-judgmentally and reassure them that their perspective is heard. As a leader, recognizing employees' emotions and contexts shows you care about their well-being. This helps create safety.

Rob explained that during the pandemic, many leaders failed to respond with empathy when employees visibly struggled with burnout and balancing work-life realities. This eroded trust and psychological safety, contributing to the Great Resignation.

Empathetic leaders who expressed genuine concern about people's situations maintained engagement and loyalty. Even small gestures to accommodate employees' challenges made a difference.

Lead with Empathy

As Maya Angelou said,

“I think we all have the capacity for empathy. We just need the courage to display it.”

So have the courage to listen and relate to others. Make empathy part of your leadership DNA through modeling behaviors, embedding it in company values, and making it part of regular debriefs.

When empathy becomes the norm, you’ll unlock your creativity and performance. But it starts with everyday one-on-one conversations. As Rob said, approach life as a banquet rather than starving for human connection.

The world needs more empathy and compassion. By developing empathy as a skill, you can create the psychological safety that powers strong relationships, teamwork, and business results.

Check out the full discussion here to learn more about the valuable tips Rob gave out during our discussion.