5 Easy Steps to Handle Conflict in Meetings

We all have to attend meetings when doing business, whether they are face to face in the office, or virtually online.

Inevitably you will run into conflict with colleagues and clients - you can’t always agree with everyone. Sometimes tension and conflict are good - they create excitement and spur action. But often it affects team morale and leads to resentment and bad feelings.

Conflict in a negotiation or sales meeting could mean that you’re going to fail this deal! But you might not intend to cause offence. It could just be that your communication in English is letting you down.

So, how can you deal with these situations if you have to do business in English and you are not very confident in your communication skills?

How can you be diplomatic and not offend your client, but also not lose your ground?

If you don’t have confidence in how to express yourself clearly to get your message across in a short time, you might make the situation worse!

However, with the right communication strategies, you can stop the conflict before it even starts. 

Here are the 5 steps you can follow to keep your discussions on the right track:

1. Make your words impersonal.

Focus on the WHAT rather than the WHO. Don’t get emotional about discussions - keep an objective standpoint.

E.g: DON'T say "You are making it very difficult for us to ..."

DO say "That time frame/Those limitations/These extra costs make it very difficult for us to ..."

2. Use open questions. Yes/No questions don’t allow the other person to elaborate or explain. They can’t give a real opinion on the topic. Open-ended questions give people permission to express what they want to say. You can encourage them to clarify what they mean.

E.g: DON'T ask "Don't you agree?"

DO ask "What's your opinion about this idea?"

3. Ask questions that focus on finding solutions to the problem rather than focussing on the problem and appointing blame.

E.g: DON'T ask "How did this happen?"

DO ask "What can we do to fix this/solve this problem/move forward...?"

4. Involve people in the solutions. Asking for input and opinions about changes or decisions makes others feel like they are part of the solution and the team, makes them feel valued.

E.g: "What do you think about this?"

"How do you feel about this?"

5. Does the person feel threatened? Clarify what is worrying them. Again, you need open questions to give them permission to explore the problem they have. Maybe the threat doesn’t really exist.

E.g: "Could you explain what is concerning you?"

Handling conflict using the above techniques allows you to be in charge and stop the problem before it starts - which is a win-win for everyone! Do a little preparation before you walk into your next meeting so that you know the strategies and how to express yourself diplomatically in English.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments. 

You can send me a message if you'd like to book a free 30-minute strategy session with me for some advice on improving your job performance by advancing your communication skills.