5 for 5. [5 children taken by NZ courts for 5 years still not returned to their home.]

I am a loving mum, and this is my story

0n the 18th of May 2016 my five children were taken from me by CYFS- now known as Oranga Tamariki.

For the past 5 years I have been tortured and tormented through extensive court abuse, alienation, manipulation, extreme and relentless psychological and emotional abuse which has destroyed me and my family beyond repair. I have not seen or had any contact any of my children since April 2017, over 3 years ago.

Despite my efforts to try and bring to light the truth of the horrendous concealment of facts, fabricated evidence, brainwashing of my children and alienation and child programming they have suffered, I continue to be persecuted by the Family Courts for fighting for myself and my children's rights to be together and protected from this systemic abuse.

At the time my children were taken in 2016, they were 15, 7, 6, 5 and 18 months old. My eldest son is now 21, he lives in England. He is an adult now and we do not have a functional relationship. Not because he doesn’t want to, but because he can’t as a result of the abuse we have suffered and the fatal damage that has caused our bond as mother and child which is carried on into adulthood. He has confided in me his guilt and tried to explain the damage we will not recover from by stating: “Mum, I know I should talk to you more but I can’t. We were fine until CYFS came into our lives. They destroyed our lives.”  This is a painful, almost unbearable truth that is a reality for so many.

Our story is not unique, but it will be shared for my peace and in the hope it will protect others from the harm that has been caused to us.

How my nightmare began:

I, like most people, made mistakes. I was married to a violent man, the father of my four eldest children. Our marriage lasted for 11 years however we had been separated for 10 years at the time my children were taken in 2016.

This pattern of domestic violence followed on with my next partner, the father of our youngest child, who was 18 months old at the time of her uplift. Although we had our issues, usually disputes about trivial things, there had been no reports of domestic violence for over 8 months. We were both loving parents. Dealing with a lot of stress around the time in May 2016, regarding relocation as we had a court case for the tenancy tribunal after our land lord attempted to back out of an agreement whereby we had done thousands of dollars of renovation for our bond and they were going to evict us so we were in a transition period, with mattresses on the floor and our furniture in storage awaiting the decision of the tribunal. My partner had been admitted to hospital and I was working long hours holding down a job as well as home renovations each night in between caring for my 5 children.

My children were and are my whole world. My son at 15 was a young man who I was so proud of. He was so smart and loving, my 7 year old girl was so full of life and laughter, she loved unicorns and mermaids, my 6 year old son had learning difficulties and couldn’t speak so we always kissed him on the head to show him affection and tried to stick to routines to keep him calm and happy. My 5 year old girl was gorgeous and we had so much fun together and my 18 month girl was precious, we were forming a beautiful bond.

My 6 year old boy was the focus surrounding the uplift. All of the older children attended the same school and I wanted to keep them together. Because of his learning difficulties, he was in a satellite class where a specialized teacher would work with him.

Although my son couldn’t speak we communicated and had a natural bond. He had a new teacher and over the course of two months she was reporting me to social workers almost weekly with complaints and criticisms against me as a mother as a result of my sons behavior towards her. I was concerned about reports of him spitting at her as he only ever spat at people he didn’t like. The teacher alleged I was “coaching him” to behave that way.

I was becoming increasingly stressed about the schools conduct and bullying towards me and I felt vulnerable to their mounting allegations doing my best to be a good mother. On one occasion earlier that year I had my 18 month old asleep in the car and I had suffered a white tail spider bite that later resulted in me being hospitalized. Even then, I succumbed to the pressure of the school to try and force me to meet with them where I said, “I am not well enough to attend.” I notified the school reception I was cancelling the teacher parent appointment and to please watch my daughter who was in the car. The teacher coerced me to attend the interview despite my obvious injury, stating words to the effect: “come on, it will only take 5 minutes”. I was almost passing out and didn’t have the energy to fight so I agreed. They then woke up my 18 month old who I couldn’t carry due to the spider bite and my weakness who they placed in my arms and proceeded to criticize me for my sons behaviour. I see now this was entrapment and an instance used against me to allege I was neglectful of my daughter for being bullied by the school when I was unwell. Reading their report that “even my daughter was non-responsive and seemingly unloving towards me” was soul destroying considering they had just woken her up and forced us to undergo their scrutiny. The school had to drive me and my daughter home due to my spider bite swelling up and the position travelling to my heart requiring hospitalization and observation.

The day my children were taken I remember it vividly,

On the day of the uplift, I had arranged an interview for a new job, so I dropped my kids at school around 8:20am, which was earlier than usual. My 6 year old was a bit unhappy and I called him over for a kiss goodbye. He didn’t look at me so I jokingly said “Oh, don’t you love mummy? Come here for me to say goodbye.”  He turned his cheek for me to kiss him on the forehead which is why I distinctly remember at the time he was dropped off at school he did not have any bruises to his face. I had informed the teacher earlier he had a scratch across his forehead from falling out of a tree climbing over the weekend.

I was working as a manager for an IT company in Auckland when I received a call from the school at approximately 2:15pm on 18th May 2016. They were asking me about the injuries to my 6 year old sons face. No one mentioned anything about bruises so I assumed they were talking about the scratch I had spoken to his teacher about earlier. As the complaints about me from this teacher were weekly, I was somewhat used to this criticism and thought “here we go again.” I had concerns for my son with her but never in a million years did I think that it would be the last time I saw my children for months.

At 4:15pm I received a call that CYFS were taking my children and they could be placed with family. I couldn’t believe it, I was absolutely in shock. I called my partner who was only just out of hospital recovering from treatment. He went to collect our 18 month old girl.

I wasn’t able to leave work until I had management approval due to the limited supervisors on the floor, so I rushed to after school care “OSCAR” as soon as I could get out. CYFS social workers had my 4 older children detained in a classroom until 10:pm with no food and unable to speak to me or their dad. It was clear the children would not be placed with family. This was a devastating and deeply distressing experience that still traumatizes me to this day. All of this was done without any court orders or a warrant from the police. The police officer I pleaded with to allow me to see and hold my children, asking how he could do this without a warrant, refused us our rights, stating: “You will do as I say.” Without any lawful grounds to dictate or facilitate this uplift or separation for the children from me.

I was prevented from having ANY contact with my children until after Evidence Video Interviews [EVIs] were conducted. These took a couple of months to take place after the uplift and were used as grounds to continue to isolate me from the children. When I did finally see the EVIs I was horrified.

My 5 year old girl said I was her “best friend” in her questioning the day of the uplift. My heart broke. She looked confused and when the interviewers continued to ask her the same leading questions she broke down and said “well at least I got some of the questions right” It was obvious to me, as her mother, she had been coached and was stressed about not remembering all of the answers she had been told to give.

My 6 year old boy can’t speak so there was nothing disclosed about what had happened to him between me dropping him at school at 8:20am and how he sustained bruises while in the care of a teacher he was spitting at by 2:15pm. She was not interviewed nor any other teachers or children from the classroom.

My 7 year old girl said I had punched and kicked her in the stomach, closely followed by; “Where’s my gift- I was promised a gift if I came here” She had no injuries and there were no photographs or evidence of bruising or corroborating stories from any of the children regarding this alleged disclosure. I have never kicked or punched my daughter and it was soul destroying to hear her words as it was clear she had been programmed to say those things for a reward.

My eldest sons statement was withheld.

On completion of those videos I was refused all access for contact with my children.

Since that day in 2016, my life has been a living hell. The distress, depression and anxiety I suffer has been debilitating. This psychological and emotional damage has manifested into physical damage which has seen me undergo a radical hysterectomy which almost killed me. I had 29 cancerous cysts removed from my body as well as my uterus. Although I probably wasn’t going to have any more children, the fact that I now cant, compounds the devastation I feel at having my birth right as a mother taken from me and my children. This is something no amount of time, acknowledgement or compensation will ever repair or replace.

I have fought so hard for so long for myself and my childrens’ rights to justice.

I have been tormented with the most horrendous experiences of corruption, dishonesty and systemic failures from the family courts and social workers employed by them who profiteer from their abuse of me, my children and the court processes.

It would seem hysterical to even begin to share the truth of the matter of what happens behind closed doors in chambers and the threatening emails I have received from judges silencing me prior to hearings to prevent the truth coming out.

Just as an overview to give some understanding of what has taken place:

In 2017 my children were hurt in care, one of my daughters broke her arm and I was not allowed to see her. Another daughter when I saw her in April 2017 she apologized for “making a mistake that day” and I didn’t realize what she meant until I saw a letter produced from an Aunt later on a perfectly cut our love heart saying “I wish my Cousin was my mum”. Children are not weapons and should not be programmed, alienated and manipulated to abuse others or court processes. My daughter was crying at the window that day in April 2017, begging me to take her with me. She also gave me a letter where she wrote Crying Letter, I will cry, I will miss you, I will think of you mum. I love you heaps and to dad I love you and Dad.My heart broke as I left and I had to look away to hide my tears from her. I didn’t leave by choice. I’d realized a year earlier I had no choice, that ideal had been replaced with a sense of defeat and blind hope that this nightmare would end when the truth came out and my children would return home.

My greatest regret is when the social workers asked me if I wanted my oldest boy returned to my care. Of course I desperately wanted him home, along with all of my children BUT I knew how devastating that would be for the younger siblings being separated from him so I said: “No, don’t separate them, I won’t them all to come home together.” I now know that was a pivotal moment that has cost me and my eldest son our relationship, when that was the very thing I was trying to protect and preserve for all of my children.

On 30 August 2018 Judge Ida Malosi placed another crippling nail in the coffin for any hope of myself and my children reuniting by granting a 101 order ,Under Section 18B where I most certainly am not a person who reaches the criteria as 18B is a person who has murdered a child or previously had a child placed in home for life and courts ruled you can never have children in your care, commonly referred to as: “home for life” where they are, which means my children will remain estranged from me. This decision was made on the recommendation of Oranga Tamariki social worker “Jane Freeman.”

In the Notes Of Evidence from that hearing in 2018, the judge is on record addressing my concerns of unconscious bias by stating “I am bias, but only in a professional manner”. This admission is one that continues to haunt me as an ultimate injustice to myself and my children’s rights to be a family and protected from such bias which has caused so much harm to us.

I have had 4 separate social workers assigned to this case in 5 years. One of whom “Eileen Mahe Tupou” caused significant harm to myself and my children. She brainwashed them to believing she was their mother, made sexual advances towards my ex partner to leverage his contact with the children, revoking contact when he refused her. She subsequently terminated his contact alleging he had distressed our daughter by telling her that he was her father.

I later found out this woman “Eileen Mahe Tupou” employed by CYFS- renamed “Oranga Tamariki” was not even qualified to work as a social worker as stated by the registry I contacted, however she had been given the role and fraudulently mislead myself and countless others to believe she was qualified. To date there has been no action taken against her criminal and damaging conduct nor a remedy for the harm she has caused my children, myself and the court proceedings littered with her false statements and defamation against me.

I have had ongoing litigation with Oranga Tamariki, the privacy commissioner, all of whom have investigated and confirmed significant evidence has been withheld from the courts and substantial failings have occurred, yet these matters remain unresolved as Oranga Tamariki refuse to compensate me and my children by issuing a formal statement of facts, instead attempting to silence me with a gagging order and $5000 which I have taken as an ultimate insult to the injury they have caused myself and my family. This offer was declined.

Judge Rogers recently revoked my guardianship of my children rendering me legally powerless to have any rights or involvement in my children’s lives.

On 16th March 2021 Judge Rogers released a minute victimizing myself and re traumatizing the significant damage and injustices myself and my children have suffered. She highlighted her refusal to allow me to appeal the orders made in 2018 to remove me legally as the children mother repeating Judge Malosi’s ruling: “There was no realistic prospect of the children returning to their parents care.” That decision was appealed but upheld by the high court in their decision issued 31 January 2020. Words like this have a significant impact on people. When I read this decision for the first time, I died inside and the level of grief I experienced was almost fatal. This minute issued by Judge Rogers could be comparable to emotional and psychological manslaughter.

On 12th March 2021 I attempted to file 6 documents outlining the history of the case, judicial failings, false information judges had relied on provided by Oranga Tamariki etc. Judge Rogers refused to accept any of these for the upcoming hearing, and made the direction in her minute dated 16 March 201: “I have put the documents in one bundle and direct that the registry returns them all” to myself. This was for an upcoming hearing for me to fight to have any access to my children or retain any guardianship rights over them as their mother.

The final statement made by Judge Rogers in her minute dated 16 March 2021 was utterly devastating and are what broke my spirit and destroyed me as a mother and any hope I had in ever being able to care for my children again. “The hearing next week must proceed in the context that of the finding that there is no realistic possibility of the childrens’ return to parental care. Therefore the court will be determining [the mothers] access application on the basis that access will be to sustain kinship and identity not to underpin any ultimate return of the children to care of [the mother]. I will not permit any attempt to re litigate the matters which have already been decided. Overarching all enquiries will be the paramount consideration of the childrens’ well-being and best interests.”

A hearing date was set down to murder my motherhood as I saw it, from 23-26 March 2021.

The following day, a minute was released by Judge Rogers refusing to accept any further documentation from me stating: “Further, [the mother]is seeking to raise numerous additional issues which are not currently before the court at next weeks long course fixture. I have received lawyer for childrens’ [Jane Flemings] latest report, and it is very clear to me that these proceedings should not be allowed to be protracted or prolonged. The hearing scheduled for next week needs to bring some finality and certainty for these children, who have been subject to Court proceedings for far too long.”

I was devastated and again felt betrayed by the Lawyer For Child who is supposed to represent the children’s best interests but more often than not, appears to act as a servant of the court to prioritize convenience and maximum profit over the children’s well being. When I read this minute I became enraged by the Lawyer for child and emailed her to express my inability to comprehend her dishonest conduct and active role in preventing me from being a mother to my children. I voiced my heartache stating: “No child ever rejects their parents unless they are taught to”

I was unable to cope with this psychological abuse and I sought help from a medical professional who assessed me as unfit to attend court. I presented a medical certificate to the court dated 22 March 2021 stating: “This patient was assessed by me on 22/03/2021 and in my opinion was medically unfit to attend from 22/03/2021 and should be able to return on 29/03/2021.”

I submitted a request to postpone the hearing for medical reasons and supported this with the medical certificate of a general practitioner as well as a letter of support from my psychologist, confirming in her professional opinion as of 22nd March 2021 “These recent events have impacted [the mother] emotionally and psychologically therefore she is not able to focus on representing herself and preparing her case adequately. [the mother] needs time to recover from this major loss.”

Despite these professional letters and recommendations for my psychological well being and under duress Judge Rogers ordered me to attend a hearing on 23 March 2021. At the hearing on 23rd March 2021, although I was not mentally or emotionally well, I attended under duress and again pleaded with the judge to postpone the hearing. Judge Rogers declined my request and openly criticized my efforts to support my psychological distress with clinical evidence. The judge openly ridiculed my psychologist as “unqualified” and discredited her qualifications because her letter was not on a letter head. My psychologist then swore an affidavit to protect my mental health and her reputation, confirming on 26th March 2021: “It was my conclusion that her application seeking a postponement was highly appropriate”

I was not well enough to stand trial and as a result of my inability to cope with the circumstances I did not attend the hearing on the final day.Judge Rodgers also had threatened me with consequences /jail for contempt of court for prior sharing court rulings. In Judge Rogers minutes dated 31 March 2021 she writes: “The fact [the mother] has left the court and abandoned her proceedings is, in my view, very sad.” It seems ironic the judge implies any surprise or “sadness” that I was not able to complete the hearing, despite the medical evidence advising her of this probability. The judge further championed the Lawyer for child, Jane Freeman, despite her submissions as Lawyer For Child to prevent my access to the children Judge Rogers commended her submissions as “anxious to support some evolution of the relationship between [the mother] and her children with a view to implementing contact in an access setting” I was beyond any point of comprehension and had been destroyed by a system functioning exactly as it was designed, to destroy families for maximum profit.

On the 13th of April I received a reminder there would be another hearing for the LFC the next day to continue to diminish my guardianship rights or any involvement in my children’s lives. Again I will ill prepared and still not fit to attend, however, I forced myself to go to court to continue to fight for myself and my children.

On 14th April 2021 I showed up at Manukau Court, I didn’t know what to expect, but certainly not a complete lack of empathy or compassion from the Lawyer For Child. I cant even remember what was said, I just remember being so enraged and devastated by a system that had failed us and a woman, Jane Freeman so heartless to the damage she was causing myself and my children. I recall the judge being more understanding and less abusive that Judge Rogers, but I was in a deep despair and the damage had been done. I think I swore something like “fuck this, I’ve held my character for long enough. I’m tired of being abused by these people. I’m going to pick my bag up and get the fuck out” I think I hit a wall outside and didn’t know what to do. I had to wait for a friend who was giving me a lift home and I saw the Lawyer for Child. I asked her: “Are you happy now Jane?” Did you get what you wanted?”  I don’t know why I think I expected her to be sympathetic, maybe even apologetic for the abuse I had suffered. Her response took me completely off guard. She said: “What, I haven’t done anything.”

I snapped. I don’t remember anything other than hitting her on the head and moving over to the grass before security tackled me. I read a disclosure statement from police as a summary of facts concealing Janes antagonistic denial of any accountability for the abuse and trauma I have suffered, only that I was allegedly waiting for her. This is untrue. I was waiting for my ride.

They allege I hit her seven times with my right hand and that I admitted to the assault as “natural justice”

Now, in addition to the trauma and abuse of isolation from my children, facilitated by Oranga Tamariki, and the family court, I am being processed like so many through the criminal gateway to face criminal charges against one of my abusers, literally for my inability to cope with the emotional and psychological abuse I have suffered relentlessly for over 5 years. This was not a “premeditated attack” as it has been framed to be by the police. I am not a violent or aggressive person. This incident on 14th April 2021 was the result of me being pushed to a limit that I temporarily lost control. This was not a sudden or unpredictable “snap”. This was a highly probable risk the courts were aware of, in possession of medical evaluations confirming my fragile state, prior to further duress. Reflecting now I can see how these court fixtures and correspondence so close together and the criticism of my cries for help were used as entrapment to entice an uncharacteristic outburst from me. Judge Rogers directing proceedings for further family court abuse, when I still hadn’t recovered from the last loss was an act of gross and malicious negligence for the courts convenience to “tie up loose ends” at whatever personal cost this came to me.

I am now facing up to 1 year in incarceration for my failure to cope with this abuse any more. Considering the 5 years I have already served as a victim of family court abuse, perhaps this will feel like a holiday. I am terrified for myself and my children and have a deep empathy for anyone who finds themselves at the mercy of the family courts when Oranaga Tamariki or CYFS are involved. Having my 5 children taken from me has been the most distressing, traumatic and deeply devastating experience of my life and this is a grief I live with daily, mourning the loss of my children who are still alive but, in every way thanks to court orders, dead to me.

I will not stop fighting for them but I should not have to fight an entire system determined to prevent me being a mother, inclusive of life threatening litigation.

https://xlpt.wordpress.com/2021/05/30/5-for-5-5-children-taken-by-nz-courts-for-5-years-still-not-returned-to-their-home/

#justus #unbelievable #notanotherstatistic #familycourtnz #enoughisenough #CHILDRENSRIGHTS #unitednations #ministryofjustice #UNICEFFOREVERYCHILD #sendhelp