5 ADHD Building Blocks of Success
I love hearing stories from people I follow and admire about the reality of their situation. Not the sugar-coated version that seems so “inspiring” but yet somehow “unattainable”.
I don’t ever want to give off the impression that I think I’ve got it “all figured out”.
My goal is to share what I’ve learned for those perhaps just a few years behind me in their journey, or those just for the first time exploring the idea they may be ADHD, (I like “be” vs have because for me it’s not something I “have” it’s something I “am”), and the truth about what I am discovering in real-time for those who are looking simply for support or validation that?they are not alone?in this.
That said, just like most of you, I too have struggled throughout my life with too many thoughts and ideas racing through my brain that it can be a challenge to actually convert ANY of them to a “finished product”.
Cut to:?It’s Sunday at 10:42am as I am writing this. I intentionally did not set a specific time that these go out on Sunday for this reason. So I could avoid being “late”. Of course, I still want to judge myself and find all the reasons why I?“should have done this earlier in the week”, but I won’t.
Instead, I will focus on the positives in that a couple hundred people now have raised their hands and said they would like to hear from me to better understand their ADHD and improve their lives. That’s powerful.?
What I will do instead of shaming myself is use the momentum I’m building to get excited about creating it earlier in the week next time. And even more important than?when?it goes out is,?if?it goes out and?what it says.
This week has been powerful for me and I am beyond proud of the?online course?I put together and launched to the world. We are starting our first weekly coaching group tomorrow along with body double co-working sessions and I’d love for you all to join us. You can learn more about that?here.
So back to this current moment.
Son is hyperactive and trying to play, playdate coming over in hours, trying to build a trampoline, you can get the picture.
Yet I have this commitment to put out something of value to my audience so?how can I bring myself to step away and find the calm mind and the focus to gather my thoughts?
I coordinated a 2-hour block of time right now with my family to step away and create a chamber of silence where I can focus uninterrupted and allow my nervous system to relax enough for my brain to access the part where magic comes from.
So now sitting here with a calm body and clear mind, what could I share with you all that would add something to your week and your life in some meaningful way?
Well, I realize that,?just a few years ago, this very moment, where I can sit uninterrupted on a weekend to put energy into something I am so deeply passionate about and energized by, in a constructive way, that helps the world,?would have been impossible for me.
What changed?
Here are a few of what I believe are the?building blocks of my current success?and how I have been transforming my life and my relationship with my ADHD over the past 5 years:
#1) Boundaries:
I have learned the value of powerful boundaries and learned the skills to cultivate them in all areas of my life. More to come on the complex ADHD relationship with boundaries in the future but, here are some of the ways I’ve strengthened them to create the space I need:
#2) Structure:
I have components that contain me and help me?stay focused without too much analysis?or second-guessing myself. Some of these key structures include:
#3) Accountability:
I have created dependencies that hold me accountable which is a?HUGE driver of follow-through.
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#4) Interest alignment:
I have embraced how CRITICAL interest alignment is for my motivation and I plan to do an entire newsletter soon on the ADHD brain and our?“interest-based nervous system”. (*In the meantime, to learn more about this connection, watch the video?in this article.)
When learning how directly tied to our performance this element was, I turned to a recently made famous framework for discovering my “true purpose” called?“Ikigai”. If you’re unfamiliar with it,?this video?explains it really well.
What is my Ikigai? Well, building an online business focused on coaching people with ADHD checks many boxes for me in terms of interest which makes it SO much easier to get in FLOW and show up in a powerful way. Such as:
#5) Autonomy & Flexibility:
This is critical for us ADHD folks. Some of the ways this plays a role for me is:
We will continue exploring these elements together. I encourage you to reflect on the role each of these is playing for you in your own life and try to identify areas you could focus on improving this week.
One of the things I talk about in my new online course is the idea of how difficult “completing tasks” is for us ADHD folks. I compare it to landing a plane and how we get stuck “in flight” and struggle to close things leaving them perpetually as “open tasks”.
Well as I sit here running out of my negotiated time to work on this, and the pressure kicks in to “finish” this newsletter,?I am at a loss for any profound and creative way to end it.?
Instead of trying to come up with something brilliant, I will leave you with something that I hold very dear to my heart. ????
I love you all:
PS - For additional reading about the topic of structure, below is some fantastic information I grabbed from ChatGPT which you are welcome to browse through!
Here are some examples of what experts might refer to when discussing "structure" in the context of ADHD:
These examples illustrate how structure can be implemented in various aspects of an individual's life, including daily routines, physical environment, task management, time allocation, and external supports. Implementing such structure helps individuals with ADHD?better organize their lives, manage their time, and maintain focus, leading to improved productivity and overall well-being.
Maintaining structure can be challenging for individuals with ADHD due to several reasons:
It is important to recognize that the challenges in maintaining structure for individuals with ADHD are related to underlying neurocognitive factors. However, with?understanding, support, and the implementation of strategies tailored to their needs, individuals with ADHD can develop strategies to overcome these challenges and establish a structured environment that promotes their success.
?????Trusted IT Solutions Consultant | Technology | Science | Life | Author, Tech Topics | Goal: Give, Teach & Share | Featured Analyst on InformationWorth | TechBullion | CIO Grid | Small Biz Digest | GoDaddy
9 个月Ian, thanks for putting this out there!
Director | Digital Customer Experience, Data Enablement
1 年Recently read this commentary from James Clear that highlights the importance of routines and task separation: https://jamesclear.com/schedule-goals. I have found success in focusing on a schedule for operation rather than a deadline for performance: staying on schedule becomes a "win" and hence motivation to reach ultimate performance goal. “Instead of giving yourself a deadline to accomplish a particular goal by (and then feeling like a failure if you don’t achieve it), you should choose a goal that is important to you and then set a schedule to work towards it consistently"
Founder & CEO - Insightful Hub | Helping you to grow your business online
1 年Your post is so inspiring Ian! Thanks Ian Tenenbaum for helping entrepreneurs skyrocket to success also for sharing your experience and wisdom to help us rise above who are facing this problem called 'ADHD'. ????
Lara Acosta Launching my newsletter on here also. Good idea ??♂? What do they experts say about this lol?