#49 July 1st, 2022

Thought of the newsletter: It's easy when going into conversations, especially ones that deal with a tough topic or ones that involve lots of emotions, to have the mindset of talking at the other people rather than with the other people. You go in with the goal to prove your point, change other's minds, and to be the one who is "right." But what happens when everyone goes in thinking that way? Nothing really changes, no one learns or grows, and it can also damage relationships. You have to put the other people above your ego's need to be right. Who knows, maybe you'll hear a perspective you've never thought of and you can improve on what you think. We should question what it is that we think we know. Have a genuine curiosity and desire to learn what other people are thinking and how they developed their viewpoint. It is okay if you do not get to bring up every point that you want to make. It's better to actually listen to the other people rather than only thinking about the next thing you want to say. Be a person who focuses on growing positive relationships!

https://affordanything.com/to-do-more-do-less/

A very common reason that people struggle to achieve their goals is they are simply trying to do too much at the same time. You cannot transform every area of your life or reach five specific goals within one area (like health) all at once. Focusing on a smaller number of things and making small changes over time is the way to success. It’s common advice from very successful people that you need to limit your focus to a very small number of goals, maybe even only three or four. Then come up with clear metrics and habits that you can do every single day to move closer to those goals. Inevitably distractions and other goals may pop up to try to take you off course, but make sure you focus on just that one metric that really matters today. If your current plan is clearly not working you can always change it, but just make sure you’re not hopping from goal to goal giving up too easily and never actually making progress. Switching too fast will only ensure that you don’t change anything about your life.?

Family Issues: Tension Between Your Parents and Your Spouse

This article explores the common marriage problem where one spouse feels caught between their partner and their family. It’s a very difficult position to be in, as your allegiance for your whole childhood was probably always to your family and parents, but now your allegiance should be to your partner first. There’s that conflict and pull between the old and the new. But in the authors opinion there is a clear choose: spouse/partner over parents. You did not choose your parents when you were born but you did choose your partner. Your partner is who you are building a life and a family with for the rest of your time. Most likely you and your partner are going to be alive and together after your parents are gone. You do not want resentment to build up between the two of you because of your family. It’s a very difficult choice, but whatever you choose will naturally come first and you don’t want to lose your marriage for your family.?

A Simple Guide to Enjoy Cooking

Maybe cooking is a habit you want to try to do more of in the second half of the year but you’re not quite sure how to approach it or you have some concerns going into it. This article has a lot of simple tips and tricks to enjoy cooking more, which will make it easier to create a new habit of doing it regularly. It’s a straightforward but important to make sure you’re actually cooking meals that you enjoy eating. There’s a healthy intersection of food that is healthy and food that you enjoy, and that is where you want to be.??Using proper and high quality kitchen tools and ingredients will inevitably lead to a better final product which in turn leads to more enjoyment from the whole process and motivation to keep getting better at cooking. It’s a skill you can get better at with time and practice.?

When to Prepay Your Mortgage Instead of Investing - Keep Thrifty

Many people may wonder is it better to invest extra money in the market as opposed to paying off your mortgage early since stock prices are relatively low and many people got a mortgage during the historic run of law rates we had over the last several years. Of course there's always the risk stocks could keep going lower, I want to make sure to acknowledge that. The author of this article actually did a historical analysis to break it down from a numbers standpoint and in 75% of the outcomes they studied you would indeed be better off investing than pre-paying. But we should now financial decisions are not purely numerical. You need to think about the stress and mental factors too. There is relief that comes from reducing your mortgage debt. Your mortgage rate is a sure thing whereas stock could keep going lower despite how bad returns have been this year. You have to weigh all of those risk factors in your decision.?

Say Farewell to Sunk Costs — Life and Whim

This article gives a good high-level overview of what the sunk cost fallacy is and why we need to make sure to not fall victim to it. We definitely should study the past and learn from it, but we should not make decisions solely based on it especially when it comes to the effort or time that we have put into something. You cannot get any of that time back and what’s done is done. The time is gone. Don’t stay stuck in a bad situation just because you have tried to fix it. If something needs to change then you should change it now, don’t worry about what would have been different if you’d tried to change it sooner. The past should not be an anchor holding us down. Don’t maintain the status quo just because it is what is easiest. Do what is actually best for you now even if that requires difficult change. Think about your future self more than your current self.?