40 to 40: Vocation

I turn 40 years old in 40 weeks.?I'm using this as an excuse to reflect on (what I hope is) the first half of my life, capturing 40 lessons learned as I count down to my birthday.

Today I'm thinking about vocation.

Vocation can be understood in many ways. It could be something you feel God (or anything greater than yourself) is calling you to do. It could be something for which you are especially well-trained. It could be something where your natural talents really shine. Or it could be a mixture of these things.

However you choose to think about it, a vocation is not a job. It means a lot more than a narrow transactional activity, performed for compensation.

Why am I thinking about this right now? Well, in case you missed my wife's post, I'm going back into the Marines as a reservist. The only way I can explain this decision is that I see it as a vocation.

The hardest part about the decision was trying to explain it to my children. I wrote out a long explanation, rewrote it several times, then shared it with my wife to make sure she was comfortable with it. This is what I said to my children:

I made an important decision that I wanted to share with you. I am rejoining the Marine Corps.?

This is a big decision and I want you to know some important things about it. I hope this explanation will help you understand me better.?

First, I talked to your mother throughout the process. I didn’t make this decision on my own, and I would not have done this if she wasn’t supportive. Your mother and I are a team. She supports this decision, even though she is worried about me.?

Second, I will still work at BMNT. This is more like a second small job, not a new big job. This job doesn’t pay enough money for us to live in this house and go to private school and go on trips, so I have to keeping making all the money from BMNT.?

Third, I’m doing this for one specific project. The Marine Corps is starting a new team to do a special mission. I can make a big difference by helping them because I have a lot of experience.?After this job is done, I will?probably not stay in the Marine Corps.?

Fourth, I’m doing this because I love the Marine Corps. It’s almost as important to me as our family because it helped me become who I am today. When I love something, I work hard to make it better. Someday you both will work hard on the things you love, too.?

Fifth, I will not be in any danger. The Marine Corps does a lot of things, not just fight wars.?My job will not be fighting, and I also expect to stay in the United States.?

Sixth, this job will take me away from you sometimes. I can do most of the job from home, but I will need to get together with other Marines sometimes. The hardest part of this job will be missing you two and your mother while I’m away.?

Seventh, I am doing this to serve our country. I talk to you both about this a lot, and I want to follow up my words with deeds. Your family on both sides has served and I also expect you to serve, but that doesn’t have to be the military.?

Eight, it’s important to me that you know I am excited. I love adventures, just like you. I will get to do hard work that makes a big difference. That’s an important part of life, and your mother and I expect you two to live this way as well.?

Ninth, I am scared. I’m worried about the extra work, about being away from you, and about whether this is the right decision. I’ve prayed about it a lot, though, and I have peace. I think God wants me to do this.?

The next thing that will happen is cutting my hair. I invite you both to come with me on Tuesday afternoon. Mr. Dave will cut my hair very short. I will look different, but I will still be the same person. When I leave the Marines again, I will grow my hair back out.?

The last thing I want to say is I love you both so much. I am ready to answer any questions you have.?

Ultimately, this long explanation is an attempt to capture a vocation. A calling. I learned about the specific opportunity?in the Marines through a random connection I don't know very well. I immediately clicked with the unit's commanding officer, and totally bought into his vision (he reminds me of my cofounder and BMNT's CEO Pete Newell). Each person I met increased my enthusiasm and this vague but profound sense that this is what I'm meant to do.

Maybe I'm wrong. Certainly I've been wrong in my predictions before. But each time I feel this kind of calling and I turn the situation prayerfully over to God, I am filled with a sense of confidence and peace. I know this is the right path, regardless of the obstacles and sacrifices. And what can I say in response?

Onward.