40 things I have learned in 40 years!

1.It is OK to agree to disagree. The world is filled with people who have different views, beliefs, and convictions. It’s OK to lean into this tension from time to time and celebrate differences.

2.Everyone has “feelings”. It’s OK to “feel” a certain way. No one can take the way you “feel” away from you.

3.It’s OK to say NO! I have learned over the years that NO is not a bad thing. It may mean just not right now, bad timing or never but it is OK to say NO!

4.Don’t complain about what you tolerate. Too many times we complain about all the things that we allow in our lives.

5.Don’t be afraid to fail. We will all undoubtably fail at something in life. I would rather fail trying then to never try.

6.You get more bees with honey than you do with vinegar. This is something my grandmother use to tell me, it’s true!

7.Don’t let your heart lead ALL THE TIME. Many of us have good intentions, but often our heart alone gets us in trouble.

8.Don’t allow others to tell you who you are. Be confident in who you are. Be you.

9.Perception is everything. Always be aware of your surroundings.

10.Your character will always protect you. Regardless of the situation, your character will always have a paper trail.

11.Don’t get trapped into the cul-de-sac of stupidity.

12.Gossip is deadly. You have the power of life and death in your tongue. Your words and your mouth are powerful.

13.Have a spirit of generosity. Give, be generous and find ways to bless and give to others.

14.Be transparent, upfront, and honest. Honesty is the best policy. You can be honest and loving but with truth.

15.Never assume. Always ask questions and get information from the horse’s mouth. You do not want to base your feelings off an assumption.

16.Lead by example. Let people see you as a practitioner of your leading, not just hearing it.

17.Don’t allow people to take advantage of your kindness.

18.Don’t enable people to the point of crippling them. Helping + tough love = courage to be better.

19.Stand up for yourself. Don’t allow people to walk all over you. You can be civil, direct, and professional while standing your ground.

20.Work hard and play hard. Learn a work life balance. As hard as you work, enjoy your time away from your work.

21.Do what you love, regardless of what people think.

22.What happens in the dark will always be brought to light. Always stay above reproach, above board. Things always seem to work themselves out in the end.

23.Lean into fears and weaknesses. You grow in this space. Don’t allow complacency and fear to handcuff you.

24.Your past does not dictate your future. Your past is your past and it has brought you to the place you are now.

25.If you can’t believe something in the moment or you just aren’t “feeling it”, find people around you that can believe it for you or stand in the gap when you are weak.

26.Find your passion and go after it. Be passionate about something that’s impactful and life changing.

27.Bleed well, meaning… when you are hurting, upset, frustrated… find ways to cope and manage your emotions so that you do not bleed all over others.

28.Instant gratification is dangerous. Things take time. Slow and steady wins the race.

29.Learn to Celebrate others, always. Cheer others on! Celebrate others promotions and work.

30.Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Asking questions is not weakness. Weakness is the inability to ask for help.

31.Passiveness can hurt you. Passive aggressive is even worse.

32.Sometimes the squeaky wheel does get the attention. Always be persistent.

33.Build relationships- not just for today but for the future. Remember it’s not a race, it’s a long distant run.

34.Contextualize always. People need to hear and see things in different ways.

35.Never judge anyone. Don’t point out a speck in someone else’s eye when you have a telephone pole in your own eye.

36.You are inevitably responsible for yourself and your own actions. Take responsibility for you.

37.Appreciate the people around you. Life is hard. Life is short. Let others around you know you love them and care for them.

38.Be thankful and have gratitude. Things could always be worse. Count your blessings.

39.Forgive often. Forgiveness is for you more than it is for the other person.

40.Enjoy a nice glass of wine or 3. If you don’t like wine, that’s fine! Don’t judge the ones of us that do!