4 Easy Steps to Navigate Tough Times

With so much happening around the world, it's not uncommon to feel overwhelmed or helpless.

I should know. As someone with a genetic predisposition to feel more intensely than the average human, I understand what it feels like to absorb the "emotional weight" of other's suffering and have worked with trained professionals to navigate through deep seated feelings.

My counterparts and clients, however, are a different story. They've shared how stressed they've become and it is evident some weren't equipped to handle it effectively.

So with that, I wanted to share a few steps you can take to through negative events as practical as possible. Here are a few heart-centered, easy to execute action steps you can take today.

STEP #1: BREATHE

Take 10 deep, paced breaths and count to 20 each time. I'll even do it with you.

Ready? INHALE deeply and count 1, 2, 3, 4. Now HOLD your breath and count 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12. Slowly and with control, EXHALE - 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20. Repeat this 10 times or so.

By taking a step back to breathe deeply, I was able to pull myself to a more present, centered, functional state despite having big emotions.

You see, when I first heard about the devastating atrocities taking place overseas, tears began to reach the edge of my eyes. While vulnerability is strength, there is a time and place to process such things.

Experiencing this level of intensity while listening to my clients "verbally puke" makes for a not so functional meeting, so using this technique helped me continue to support them.

One thing you can say to anchor yourself in the present is, "my head and heart are right where my feet are planted." While it doesn't take away feelings, it helps manage them.

They helped me to lower the amount of adrenaline pumping through my veins so that I could think more clearly despite the overbearing thunderstorms roaming internally. 10 deep, paced breaths with a present-anchoring phrase usually did the trick.

STEP #2 - REMEMBER WHAT YOU CAN CONTROL

There are only two things you have the ability to fully control. With enough practice, intention, and training, those two things are your ACTIONS and your ATTITUDE.

There are some who may argue that controlling their actions or emotions is difficult, and they are right. Sometimes it truly is difficult, but it isn't impossible.

Author Brandon Sanderson once wrote, "A man's emotions are what define him, and control is the hallmark of true strength. To lack feeling is to be dead, but to act on every feeling is to be a child."

Our feelings are guided by what we focus on - so focus on what the positive probabilities rather than pessimistic possibilities.

For instance, it is okay to feel frustrated, angry, helpless, confused, and sadness. These are normal feelings, especially in times like these. Perhaps try to search for a silver lining?

It is okay to take a second, to step away in order give yourself a cathartic release. Crying does not make you weak. Once you have moved through the tidal wave of negative sensations, set a "I'm done processing this" boundary for yourself. Go back to doing what moves your life forward.

STEP #3 - ACCEPT WHAT YOU CANNOT CONTROL

... and release any weight of responsibility you may feel obligated to carry.

I'm not saying to forget about what it is that's troubling you. Believe me when I say I want to and am will to do whatever I can to move hardship towards resolution.

What I'm saying is that you should be mindful of how much attention you are giving to the problem because what you focus on will determines how you feel.

You cannot control what other people do. One may have the ability to influence another person's decisions through protest, petition, or one-one conversations, but you and I have no ability to act for them.

You cannot control natural phenomenons like how one's body responds to a virus, storms, wars, or the death of a loved one. You can however, do other things to make a positive difference - like exercise, take vitamins, or donate to organizations.

You cannot control the passage of time, but you can choose how you'd like to spend it.

By reminding yourself of what you can and cannot control, it creates a healthy distance for you to be more effective should you choose to respond.

STEP #4 - LIVE WITH INTENTION

Whether you choose to ground yourself in gratitude, protest with purpose, or continue doing your job, one way to honor those who we cannot directly help or influence is to take care of the responsibilities laid before us.

You go on living with heightened intention, moving forward as best as you can.

If we aren't taking care of ourselves or in a good state, then our ability to make a positive impact diminishes drastically. If we do not manage our wealth, then we are limited with how much we can give.

You may want to throw a life jacket out to the suffering, but first make sure that you're wearing yours too.

-------

Thank you for taking the time to read what I shared. If you liked this article, you might also like my LinkedIn training course or my website AmberLethem.com