A 4 Step Formula to Remove Anxiety
Have you ever woken up in the early hours of the morning because you have to go to the bathroom, or you hear a noise, or the dogs are barking? Immediately thoughts come through and once it gets your brain going you can't stop. It cascades into many different things, most of which begin to cause anxiety and then you can pretty much say goodbye to sleep.
One of the things that have been a huge misconception because I'm in the field of mindset, is that I must have this perfect mindset and nothing holds me back. That couldn't be further from the truth. The reason why I am ‘the mindset guy’ is because I've worked on it for years. I'm at a point where I'm extremely self-aware and that I've found is key!
Anxiety likes to knock on my door on occasion too, so I'm going to share with you a four-step strategy to remove yourself from anxiousness and negative thoughts.
These are strategies that'll help you when you feel the anxiety creeping in. Don't use these in the middle of a panic attack, there are tons of breathing exercises available for this.
Wright Them Down
The first thing is awareness. You are having anxious thoughts inside of your head. Pause and notice as the observer what's going on so, in other words, you need to remove yourself from your own head.
It's like the quote that I love to use, "If you don't take yourself out of the jar you can't read the label on the outside."
These thoughts are too abstract and so you need to get them out and put them on paper because trying to wrangle up your thoughts and trying to figure out what's going on and how to work through them is like trying to punch somebody in the dark. You are not going to see that person. You might take four or five swings and on the 100th swing you might hit him/ her, but then they're gone again.
That's kind of like figuring out the thoughts in your head, so write down the question:
WHAT AM I HAVING ANXIOUS THOUGHTS ABOUT?
And then just brain-dump. Lay it all out!
What you are doing by writing it down is getting it out of your head. You are basically in that room trying to punch somebody in the dark, but you have now flipped the lights on. That alone, 90% of the time, will make you feel so much better because it's not abstract anymore, it's tangible.
What's The Worst Thing That Can Happen?
The reason why it's important to ask yourself this question is that when you don't put it on paper and you're dealing with it, abstractly, your brain makes up these fears that are completely illogical and ridiculous. Your brain goes to the worst possible outcome.
By putting down the worst thing that could happen you can see it and go, "That's ridiculous, that's never going to happen," because 99, 9% of the time, it's never as bad as your brain makes it out.
You have identified it and once again flip the lights on so that you can see what's going on in your head.
What's The Best Thing That Can Happen?
By asking this question you contrast the worst that can happen and start to look at things positively and begin to create a medium ground which is more tangible.
What Is My Next Step To Make Be Feel Better Right Now?
What action can you take to make you feel better now? Write it down.
It might be as simple as making a phone call to someone, have the conversation you’ve been meaning to have for a long time, go for a run, call your business partner, whatever it is write it down.
You might realize that you can't do anything about it right now as it is still the early hours of the morning but when you wake up you've got the notes to get started right away. Writing them down makes you feel better. It's no longer this fuzz in your head.
You have an action plan; you know exactly what needs to be done because you're not trying to punch that person in the dark, you have switched on the light.
So, what do you do about it right now? Ask yourself again what the next best steps would be to make you feel better.
You have now created space for yourself to get back into the present moment.
This means that either you can put your head on the pillow and enjoy the moment of falling asleep and being at peace with yourself or you can do what I usually do before I go to sleep, take a moment to meditate and focus on what you are grateful for. If you come from a place of gratitude, of love, equanimity and peace you are going to be in a better place to put your plan into action.
So know that when you're feeling anxious thoughts, there is a strategy to get out of it. These are the four steps. The four questions to ask yourself. Next time you feel stressed, worried, fearful, anxious, any of those negative feelings, I want you to use this. I guarantee it to make you feel better.
Check out new episodes of The Mindset Mentor podcast every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday.
Inside Account Executive @ Nutanix - New England/Upstate NY Public Sector
3 年Journaling is really powerful when it pertains to anxiety. Great stuff Rob.