33 Ways to Well-Being

Well Well Well

Based on fifteen years work as an employee assistance counsellor and 25 years teaching counselling psychology at the University of Manitoba here is a 33 point guide to better wellbeing at work:

1. We must find wellbeing inside of work and not wait until we are outside of work at the end of our day or in retirement.

2. Hope is a misguided future perspective taking us away from where we can really make a difference, right here – right now.

3. There is no stress in the present moment so strive to be where you are.

4. Self-esteem is an evaluative trap that snares you like cheese snares a mouse with the snap of the trap. Accept yourself, don't evaluate yourself.

5. Life comes before work and work/life balance is not static it is a dynamic balance.

6. Wellbeing is only a concept until we engage in well doing.

7. Ignorance is more important than knowledge in fostering and enhancing wellbeing. We begin by not knowing.

8. People don’t actually hear most interpersonal feedback unless they feel safe and safety is the only way to overcome most of our problems.

9. Genuine caring trumps professional competence in almost every relationship.

10. Achieving happiness is a shallow and insignificant approach to living.

11. Structure trumps willpower in promoting and fostering wellbeing.

12. Powerful questions we ask our self are the ideal WD40 for a brain clogged by an amygdala seizure.

13. Wellbeing is strong stuff. We must know, live and leverage our strengths in the service of others.

14. It take energy directed towards wellbeing to get energy and when you are depleted this is a real hindrance to experiencing wellbeing

15. Relaxation is the anaemic aspirin of stress management and can actually cause stress.

16. What lessens your stress today could be a major contributor of stress tomorrow.

17. There are no algorithmic certainties of wellbeing, only heuristic probabilities of success.

18. In life and work you are going to fumble, fail, and fall. You are human. It is not about avoiding falling down it is about how you pick yourself back up again. Recite the following statement: I am not okay, you are not okay and that is okay.

19. Placebos are examples of caring made tangible.

20. Employee wellbeing is not a soft skill just as accounting is not a hard skill. Wellbeing embraces fluid skills when the fixed parts of our life are in need of repair.

21. Reality is overrated, living through positive illusion, not delusion, is powerful and practical.

22. Well Being is more than a personal endeavour it is a social phenomenon.

23. Only you are responsible for your own wellbeing but others are accountable for your wellbeing just as you are accountable for their wellbeing.

24. No one can upset you once 90 seconds have passed.

25. Compliance is the anemic by-product of power.

26. We do not resist change, we resist coercion and the gravity of the familiar is what holds us in place.

27. If life throws you a lemon — duck, determine where it came from, think about what you can do about it and only then contemplate making lemonade.

28. Positive thinking must be changed into a more authentic constructive thinking. Lots of bad things do happen and positive thinking may be a gloss over the rich, albeit ruggedness, of human experience.

29. Bad is at least twice as salient as good in most situations so we must tip the scales of good for good.

30. Most of what we know really isn’t so.

31. Contradiction is only troublesome if you are locked into rigid thinking and a fixed mindset.

32. Wellness tips like these without personal evaluation and experimentation can create a misguided tyranny of tips leading towards more stress. Follow the Buddha’s wisdom, be a lamp unto yourself.

33. Take a long shot. Charlie Chaplin said, “life is a tragedy in close up and a comedy in long shot.” How long does it take you to get a long shot?