30th Birthday Reflection Challenge

I recently read an inspiring post by West Point classmate and friend, Sam Ellis, on his reflections of growth on his 30th birthday. Sam summarized his thoughts after running the mileage commensurate with the years since his birth (30 miles). I am excited to hear his future reflections at 75+!

I took on this challenge albeit substituting the running portion for a bike ride. I will spare you the excuses of not being physically ready to endure 30 miles on my two feet, possibly a goal to set for 31. These reflections draw from experiences in the military and "civilian life"

1.     Cultivate meaningful relationships. During COVID I’ve had the opportunity to speak with many individuals transitioning from the military, I tell them very candidly that I would not be sitting in the seat I am today, if not for individuals who volunteered their time to me. My American Corporate Partners (ACP) Mentor, Mary Christian, and countless others both inside and outside the walls of J&J have been invaluable to my journey. This journey does not end, and is illuminated by reflection two.

2.     Be Velcro. Understanding what you might bring in terms of value will broaden your opportunities to impact others. I anticipate the sage advice from a mentor of mine will help others create common bonds and meaningful relationships that endure. It does not hurt to leverage personal commonalities such as military service, hobbies, or interests.

“Consider yourself the side of the Velcro with hooks, and the person/entity you are talking to is the side that is fuzzy, how do you stick? The more hooks the stronger the bond.

3.     Collaborate and Graduate. An adage familiar with those at the United States Military Academy. While I may have found a battle buddy to support me preparing for a physics exam, I found opportunities to return the favor by supporting them in other classes or assignments. Find others who augment you well, challenge you, and support you. Surround yourself with those who can unlock your full potential. Meanwhile, be sure to lend the hand to those to your left and right where you can support. The best analogy for this (Thank you Shane Finlay), is the barrel of monkey game where you can create a vertical chain of hands connecting to hands. The give-and-take in life is precious, and I firmly believe if you strive to give and reach out more than you take, better outcomes will follow.

In some cases you will be the hand extended for someone else to hold you as you climb, while you should never turn a blind eye to the opportunities to be the hand for others and elevate them beyond you.

4.     Eat humble pie. Continuous learning and resources are more accessible than ever. I encourage you to not be too proud to learn and explore new horizons. There are top notch educational programs and resources, for vets, The DoD Skillbridge Program, American Corporate Partners, and Breakline stand out among the rest, while LinkedIn Learning, Coursera, and other platforms offer free education.

5.     It’s those in the arena with you that matter. We all have trials and tribulations on this growth journey that is life, but either as a source of motivation or wisdom, I tend to frequently revisit Teddy Roosevelt’s “man in the arena” speech. Failure and mistakes are learning lessons in themselves and that is the excitement of the journey. Step inside the arena, and learn from both the good and bad.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena

Would love to see others accept this challenge and share your thoughts. Feel free to reach out to me to connect if this was useful and meaningful.

With your shield or upon it.